Exausted with one year old

[Lolly127]

First time mum to a one year old girl . I am still bone tired since I’ve had her . She is a terrible sleeper and for some reason even though I’m exausted I can’t go to sleep as early as I used too ! I now have bed time anxiety , I used to nicely fall asleep at 9 and be up 6/7 and work a full week .
i can’t nod off till 11 30 and now I’m constantly paranoid I’ll be bone tired forever and never feel good again . Baby is a bit of a monkey , but she’s has a night cough since December and is up most of the evening . They have said viral and nothing on her chest so it’s one of those things . I am not enjoying being a mum if I’m honest . I feel that tired . I used to be very organised and now I feel chaotic and unorganised . Every day is a battle and I’m just not enjoying my days . I’m usually quite fun although I do have anxiety and this isn’t a new thing . It’s been with me a very long time and I’m extremely open about it . I do feel like I’m dipping as I’m worried I’m not enjoying my mum role , I’m too tired to give everything 100 percent . The house has gone to shit and my partner is doing a lot . This makes me feel lazy but I’m just knakered . I’m back to work 3x per week and do like being back in work place but this is just relentless. Don’t feel like me atall , feel like I’ve let myself go and my house and judr my life

The easy question is what's your partner doing in all this? He should be doing half the nights.

1 is hard, they're very much still a demanding baby but getting toddler demands. Into everything. Sleep can still be very bad. Adjusting to being back at work with the illnesses and pick ups and drop offs to squeeze into your days. Its tough, please cut yourself some slack.

A year on I felt much better at work, they can "help" as you do bits in the house, will sit for 30 mins with some playdoh rather than lose interest after 2 minutes, don't have to have eyes on them all the time. It's still tiring - can't remember last time I cooked something I wanted rather than whatever is quick, nutritious and will dirty as few pans as possible. And I still crash post bedtime, but it's better.