So I have 2 girls. One is 2 and a half and the other is 4. I feel like I try my best to be a good dad to them. I play with them, am genuinely happy when I’m around them, try to show them how much I love them, still discipline when needed etc. but it has been a constant display from them that they don’t want me. My 4 year old will throw a 30-45 minute tantrum and cry out of agony if my wife has to leave for a bit and she has to stay with me. Whenever I ask to put them to bed they freak out and say they don’t want me and cry. I hadn’t seen my daughter the entire day today, and when I went to go pick her up this evening from my mother in law’s house the first thing she says is “I don’t want you. I want mom.” My 2 year old woke up crying tonight, and I went to go lie down next to her and put my arm around her. It persisted for a good 15 minutes until my wife had to come in and lie next to her. Then instant quietness. When I get home from work, none of them care or come up to me. When my wife gets home, they jump up, scream for joy and go running to the door. When all of this started happening when they were much younger I figured it would be something they would eventually grow out of, but as my 4 year old is almost turning 5 I feel like this is abnormal and just hurtful. I just don’t get what I’m doing wrong or why they find me so repulsive. Is this just to be expected and I’m blowing this out of proportion?
Just extra background: I have been present and in the picture since day 1 with both girls. I do have a job that requires me to work overnights several days out of the month, but otherwise I’m there at normal times of the day. I have many days off during the week and at least 2 weekends off a month in which I try to plan family stuff to do.