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Relationship with my mum & 1st time grandma

5 replies

Hello1989 · 14/02/2024 09:52

Hi All, not sure what my outcome here is i guess looking for thoughts or comments... a bit of background on me, I am an only child to two divorced parents in their 70's. Married with little one due later this year. my husband comes from very close family who are all amazing i adore my MIL and PIL.

I grew up with an alcoholic mother who until about two years ago denied she was an alcholic (im 35 now) for example when i was at school in south london i got exposed by an older man when i was 10 years old. the school called her to come get me and she was too trashed, when i walked home by myself she didnt offer me any consolation she was just drunk on the sofa with her friends. She always was drink driving with me (shes had her licence taken away from her three times and been in trouble with police, this was in my later 20's) id come home to her usually playing loud music telling me she would probably die tomorrow (for no reason other than being drunk) etc. She does a "single parent" to everyone which kills me as it just isnt what it seems. There have been too many circumstances to mention. Thoroughout life she would be nasty about my only consistent support - my dad has told me how awful he is and unless i got money from him she would say "well ill have to let your room out then" (for reference i begged my dad to send me to boarding school when i was 13 so i didnt have to endure it and when i came home on weekends this is where i had to pay) This makes her sound awful, and she was however when she is sober (as she is now for three years) she is actually a very kind person and has lots of friends that adore her. ive also supported her financially in the past but thats not the issue.

naturally i have never gone to her for anything or advice, but shes always been my mum ive supported her. She is now sober and is so excited to be a granny. I keep my boundaries with her from only seeing her once for a couple hours ever other week as thats all i can take (she also is very anxious and if your alone with her she dumps all her problems around finances and health on me) my concern is that she keep making comments about how excited she is about the baby and how much time shes going to spend helping me and what she wants to teach and show baby, truth be told i dont want her around me more than what i can take and on top of all our past we are just SUCH different people i dont really enjoy her company at all either. I have my inlaws, tons of friends and husband for "help" and the thought of me spending more time with her makes me feel so uncomfortable. How do i manage this? sorry how long this is!

OP posts:
Adhdsleeeep · 14/02/2024 09:58

I don’t have much constructive advice, OP, but don’t feel guilty about this. She traumatised you when you were young, of course you want to keep your distance.

I would stick with what you’re comfortable with and nothing more.

Galeforcewindatmywindow · 14/02/2024 10:03

Ime spelling out you are sorry you can't have a more 'normal' dm/dd relationship helps. Don't let her into your home. Ime she will bring all those bad memories with her. Keep to cafe meet ups. Maybe soft play as dc gets older... I am nc with dm now. I felt unable to be an adult around her.. Reverting back to a scolded small girl wasn't how I wanted to feel around my dc..
Also ime rubbish dm's make for rubbish dgm's.
Think long and hard about the future you want for your dc.

forrestgreen · 14/02/2024 11:03

Bump for you.
I have no experience to help sorry.

However if you were my friend telling me all this. I'd say you are absolutely right with those boundaries.
If she says again how much time you'll be spending together I'd have something prepared to say.

Eg I know you're excited to be a grandma and I know you'll love my child very much. However I have a lot of trauma from my childhood when you were drinking and I struggle when we spend an extended period of time together. So I suggest we continue working on our relationship now, spending x hours together every few weeks. But I'll need you to be positive about this, I can't just be there for you to dump your worries onto. I'm looking forward to seeing you in this new role as a grandma but it will take work and boundaries from us both.

I expect she'll have a tantrum about it, so just get your stuff and leave. Don't engage.

Sorry if it's the wrong advice.

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Riverlee · 14/02/2024 11:07

You need to put in boundaries and start implementing them now. Thank her for her offers of help, but gently change the narrative and say that if you need help, you will contact her. Don’t let her dictate what will happen going forward.

Hello1989 · 14/02/2024 14:35

thank you all for your advice! its super helpful and reassuring, its hard with the boundaries as i know im not in the wrong and i know people who are NC for simialr experiences but it still makes me feel guilty.. but your right i need to continue with the boundaries as i just know what will happen and i really want to protect this time

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