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Parenting

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Original poster

What age do children make friends

10 replies

Uklady23 · 08/02/2024 20:43

So my eldest started reception in September. It's a good local school, he seems happy enough going in & during parents evening the teachers said he is very social with all the class.

My worry is I have over heared mums arranging going on play dates etc.. I just concerned my child doesn't have anybody in particular they talk about. Child is 5 if that helps. What age have you found they start actually making friends.. thanks

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BugsyDrakeTableScape · 08/02/2024 20:55

They're all different. I've got girls and they all started mentioning particular names of friends about age 3. Eldest has had a firm best friend since age 3 (still the same person 7 years on) but the others have fitted between people for a few years. I don't think they start focussing on particular friends until year 1 (age 6 ish). But if your DS is happy and social then you're winning - he'll find his people

BugsyDrakeTableScape · 08/02/2024 20:56

And at this age playdates are totally parent led so maybe ask if there is anyone they would like a playdate with and facilitate it if you're concerned?

ColdButSunny · 08/02/2024 20:57

At this age play dates are usually organised between mums who know each other rather than requested by the child.

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mynameiscalypso · 08/02/2024 20:59

My DS is the same age. He seems to have one person that he plays with most (although I only know because the teacher told me). He'd be equally happy having anyone from his class round for a play date though. I haven't got round to organising one yet...

Liontame · 08/02/2024 21:02

Mine were much the same through reception. I asked the teacher if there was anyone in particular they play with mostly and arranged play dates with them. Then in year 1 they started playing with someone they'd never played with before, and they are now their ‘best’ friend.

Noicant · 08/02/2024 21:08

Mines in pre-school but from what I’ve seen of my own DD is that she likes who she likes, whether they are at a playdate doesn’t make any difference. She’ll play with whoever is there but when it comes to who she actually wants to hangout with thats up to her.

She’s similar, she’s a bit of a social butterfly but she has a few friends that she really loves and she’s disappointed if they aren’t at a meetup but it doesn’t make a difference in terms of who she will choose to play with at school.

I was quite worried about this at one point myself but she gets on with most and we live in a very transient place so making friendships quickly is an important skill. in yr 1 or 2 you will get a better picture of who their friends are and just make an effort to invite them around.

But yeah playdates are very much parent led at this age I’m not sure it will have an impact later.

If it really bothers you try to arrange something with the kids he mentions most.

LilBus · 08/02/2024 21:10

Yeah you need to be taking the lead

Heckythump1 · 08/02/2024 21:10

My littlest is 3.5 and at school nursery, she's had a core little group of 4 friends that she plays with every time and has done since September when she turned 3 :) it's very cute!

Overthebow · 08/02/2024 21:13

My dd started having actual friends at around 2.5 years. She’s 3.5 now and asks for play dates with her friends and has distinct groups of friends at nursery, dancing and within my friends group’s children.

Puddingpieplum · 08/02/2024 21:14

My DD had 2 best friends at 3, and still has them now, we've done loads of play dates and even a few sleepovers. My DS is 4 and has "guys he hangs out with" but never wants to see them outside of school. All dc are different, but if you want him to have playdates you need to make that happen, he won't have the ability to do so in Reception.

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