I'm literally at my wits end at the moment.
Dd5 has always been a poor sleeper.
As a baby she rarely napped and woke up nearly 10/15 times a night.
Since her father and i split up and I moved to our own home she started to sleep a bit better. However she goes through periods of extreme clingyness... she has to be near me or in my bed.
Until about a month ago she'd fall asleep in her room then wake up and got into my bed. It disturbed me every night and I was mostly not sleeping past 3am then going to work and doing a full day's work.
I bought a little fold out mattress and said on condition she fell asleep in her room when she comes in she goes straight to sleep on that.
It worked for a few nights..
Then she started refusing to sleep in her room and wanting to fall asleep in my bed. Close to 2 hours we were back and forth then I'd give up and let her fall asleep in my room on the mattress.
Now her latest thing is hating me having an evening and wanting me to be upstairs with her whilst she falls asleep. If I go downstairs she follows me.
I'm not having an evening at all, I can't even bloody have dinner. Its making me so resentful.
I've tried putting her to sleep at 7, 8,9pm it doesn't make a difference.
DD is hugely attached to me. For the past 4 years it's just been us. Soon she will start staying every other weekend at her father's and I expect her to regress even more so and become even more so. She's hugely upset at the prospect of staying over at her (abusive) father's house away from me. I'm worried about it tbh as he lacks patience and will lose his rag with her.
I don't know what else to do.
Anyone have any tips?
I've tried everything, lights off, night light, white noise, lullabies on the Alexa, a Toniebox, reading stories, relaxing baths, massages before bed, creep out method.. absolutely none of it works.
DD was conceived in an abusive relationship. I had counselling after I left my ex and the counsellor told me babies experience trauma from within the womb.. I can't say for sure but her sleep was always affected by shouting and screaming, arguments, slamming of doors,breaking of furniture etc.. i don't know if this has contributed to it.