Is starting a PGCE with a 1 year old wise? How did you cope going back to work after maternity?

[Kitkatgoosie]

I'm starting a PGCE Secondary course in September to become an English teacher. This was my plan before baby and I told myself I would do it when she's 1 years old in September 2024 (she's currently 7 months) to continue my career path and build a good life with two incomes for her.

However, my partner is considering starting a job in the police (he left a police employment opportunity when we moved locations) so he will be busy, I'm not sure if it's wise for both of us to be immensely busy and stressed when she's only just turned 1 and will still need us a lot.

I've also really struggled with postpartum anxiety and find it extremely difficult to be away from baby girl. The most time I spent away from her was 2 hours in A&E and I left before getting my results because I couldn't stand to be away any longer. I don't even leave her with her dad, she's EBF and I don't manage to pump milk that would make up a feed, so often it's been the anxiety of her being hungry when I'm gone. As I think about doing my teacher training I am ambitious for it but the thought of leaving baby with anyone but me or my partner is terrifying and is breaking my heart. I just want to spend every day with her and I don't know how I'll concentrate on anything but the thought of her and if she's okay and how I miss her.

Basically I'm scared that if I do a PGCE, as it's so intense and time consuming, that I 1) won't get to give my baby the attention she needs and deserves or spend the time with her I want to, or 2) I'll hate the experience and be so stressed out that I have a breakdown or don't perform as I should.

Does anyone have any advice? If you went back to work after maternity, how did you cope?

I trained for a PGCE when my dc were 3, 5 and 7. Had a full time nanny as they were at different schools/nurseries and I honestly wouldn't have managed without her. I've been teaching for 10 years now.

First placement was a 30 min drive away, second placement closer, around 15 min drive. Planning is really intense - I think mine was 3 or 4 sides of A4 typed, per lesson, finding the resources and getting them copied, marking and feedback etc., then weekly reflection meetings with my mentor. I remember getting back from school and doing dinner, bath, story and bed. I regularly fell asleep reading bedtime stories with the dc. Essay deadlines were a nightmare.

I also remember having to work the odd all-nighter, but also working well past midnight in at the first three years after PGCE, before I went part time. Would average maybe 4 hours of sleep a night. It really put pressure on relationships at home.

I really enjoy it now, but I have a big bank of lessons that only need tweaking, and I've been in my school for long enough to feel settled and established with the culture and the systems.

I would wait until your dd is older, or maybe look at part time training courses.