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Parenting

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Primary - one child hatea my DS

6 replies

NotAgain77 · 30/01/2024 19:13

Long story hopefully short. I am wanting to know if anyone has seen this kind of thing before, has any advice on how to handle it or what to ask of school.

My ds is 8. He was very good friends with a boy in his class. The friendship 'ended' suddenly with the other boy screaming at ds that he hated him and was sick of him. I witnessed this, there was no big incident beforehand. The mum started blanking me.

We have asked our ds to find other friends and keep his distance. But it's hard as they have mutual friends.

The boy has told others in their class that he doesn't like my DS. The boy joined in with some older children (known to pick on a lot of kids) in saying mean things to my ds. Sometimes the other child behaves like my ds is his friend but he then suddenly flips over tiny things (schools words) and then spends time ranting my ds, involving other children to be on his side, telling others that my ds is mean. Mum of boy has been in to school to accuse my ds of bullying. School explained her child's behaviours.

Thing is it has been 6 months and it is still happening. Today my ds and the boy were in a big group playing. They have rules for a game. The boy breaks the battle rules and another child calls him out (it's all laughing and joking). The boy breaks the rules again, this time to my ds. My ds calls him out on it and the boy gets incredibly angry kicks some of the equipment (small but made of metal) at my son. My son is hurt and cries. A friend comes to help. Boy hangs around saying tell on me, I don't care.

My questions are -
Has anyone has experience where a child really hates yours?
What is this? And what can I do?
What can I expect school to do?

This is exhausting.

OP posts:
Littlegoth · 30/01/2024 19:19

I would ask how the school are applying their safeguarding policy to protect my son from bullying. If I didn’t get a good answer I would be involving the governors. It’s been going on long enough and needs stopping now. I’m an ex teacher so know all about pressures in school, blah blah blah.

NotAgain77 · 30/01/2024 20:05

Thanks for replying @Littlegoth

Can I ask how this equates to bullying? The school seem to think it's just a matter of the child not liking my ds.

OP posts:
Littlegoth · 30/01/2024 20:33

Involving other children and encouraging them to gang up on your DS is bullying. Kicking items at your son and injuring him is bullying him. This sustained campaign of nasty behaviour towards your child is bullying. What have school put in place to stop this happening and safeguard your son’s emotional and physical wellbeing? It’s not acceptable to just say ‘oh well child A doesn’t like child B’ and use that to excuse child A’s malicious behaviour.

Littlegoth · 30/01/2024 20:38

It doesn’t surprise me that school say it’s not bullying. It definitely is. Calling it bullying means they have to do something to resolve it as they should have a bullying policy.

Caffeineneedednow · 31/01/2024 07:28

Littlegoth · 30/01/2024 20:33

Involving other children and encouraging them to gang up on your DS is bullying. Kicking items at your son and injuring him is bullying him. This sustained campaign of nasty behaviour towards your child is bullying. What have school put in place to stop this happening and safeguard your son’s emotional and physical wellbeing? It’s not acceptable to just say ‘oh well child A doesn’t like child B’ and use that to excuse child A’s malicious behaviour.

This

It is 100% bullying and you need to ask the school what they are doing to stop it

NotAgain77 · 31/01/2024 18:13

We emailed school. They did not reply. My ds was pulled out of class to be told that he should play separately from the child and that the child has been spoken to. The other child described his behaviour as competitive and said he would stop it.

I don't think this is good enough.

OP posts:
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