Advice needed regarding naps :(

[Atmywitsend7]

I'm a ftm to a six month old and I've got myself in a shitty routine. She just will not nap in the house (at least not for me anyway) I have to take her out in the pram come rain or shine. I'm currently writing this having walked around in the rain for an hour and I'm now sat in the garden with an umbrella because the minute I take her in she will snap awake. I tried my hardest this morning, she currently has hand foot and mouth so sleep is shit at the minute as it is and she awoke screaming at four and refused to go back down. Ordinarily that is the only time I can get her back down. But not today, she screamed from 4 in the morning until 9 when I eventually relented and took her out in the pram 😞 I just don't know how to break this pattern. It's all stemmed from me needing to leave the house for my own mental health (I suffered terrible pnd). I tried this morning -

rocking her in my arms.
Putting white noise on and letting her settle herself.
Singing to her
Stroking and patting
Rocking the pram in the house.
Feeding to sleep (she is ff)

She was having none of it and the minute I started walking away from the house she fell asleep. I suppose I could of turned around at that point but I had already resigned to getting myself a coffee and doing the food shop. I am exhausted.

If anyone can give any words of wisdom I would really appreciate it, even if that is just ride it out and eventually it will just click for her and she will magically nap in her cot, but as it stands this is a 3 time a day thing for me and I'm over it now ☹️

Thank you for reading my rant.

Tommee tippee soother? Or a rocket and attach it to the crib. Soothers have helped us settle baby between feeds. We have sometimes popped him in the pram in the house with the rocket going. Hope you find a solution. I'm only a couple of weeks in, so still learning and got it all to come. x

I'm sorry, this sounds really tough!

When my DD was going through a similar stage, I had some success putting her in an ergobaby. It still means you need to be up and about, but at least you've got your hands free and eventually you might be able to sit down once your LO has dropped off.

Wishing you lots of luck x

Thank you so much for your replies, I think what I needed really was just a bit of a hand hold!

I got fed up sat in the rain and true to form she has sprung back into action.

I was eyeing up the rocket the other day but thought it was too good to be true but I think I will just go for it. Anything is worth a try! I might buy an ergobaby while I'm at it.

I'm just so annoyed with myself because I feel like all of these shit habits (this isn't the only one :/) are of my own making when I was just doing anything to get through the day and now I don't know how to break them.

DS went through a similar stage around the same age. I can't remember when it stopped but he did kinda just grow out of it. I didn't do anything really. Not for a lack of trying though! I made a post myself about him only napping for 20 minutes in his crib
I used to set his pram up inside and just walk up and down the hallway. Once he was asleep I'd go have a cuppa in the living room. Every time he's ill now I have to go back to putting him in the pushchair and walking up and down the hallway and he's 15 months now.

I would love it if I could even just walk around the hall way tbh. The pram isn't what bothers me as such, it's the being outside in awful weather that's getting me down.

I swear it's the fresh air that she prefers. I've even come to the conclusion that she has pavement preferences as I can now predict which section of the path she is more likely to fall asleep on...

It's a skill I never thought would be of use to me haha

At 6 months my daughter was like this too. 2-3 h every day rain or shine. During one storm I tried walking in the garage but she knew! She was a summer born so this was all through winter. Around 9 months I managed start getting her to sleep in the house. The once she was 2 she went back to only napping in the pram but I could get her back into the house without waking her which I could never do when she was small.

I leaned into the walks and took a flask of coffee, some snacks and podcasts on with wireless headphones. I bought a decent umbrella that covered me and her and could be put up and down with a click of a button. I found the nicer estates with £1m+ properties were nicer to walk around as they had wider and flatter pavements and less muck on the footpath to walk around.

I also did a fair amount of leaning into the walks, but the rockit definitely helped with DD2 – we still had to take her out to get her to sleep, but it meant we could bring her in the house, set it going and (usually) keep her asleep.

Also, as she's six months now and doesn't need to be in the same room as you when she's sleeping, is there a place in the garden where you can put the buggy and still see/hear her from the house? With both of mine, I used to pop the buggy near the back door so I could see and hear them through the glass and then sit at the kitchen table.

Solidarity OP! I could have basically written this post. I have a 6 month old that doesn’t nap in the cot. I occasionally had some luck in feeding him to sleep and transferring him into the cot, but he would have rubbish short naps and be grouchy all day.
So I’ve given up and I walk him around at least twice a day, and it’s a pain in the arse, but I have mum friends that complain about having to be home for cot naps all day, so you really can’t win! I can get him to nap in the sling (rocking/pitch black/white noise) and I ebf so can feed to sleep so I’m not out 3 times a day, but I’m either stuck under a baby or endlessly walking.
I don’t really have any advice, but I’m focusing on gentle sleep training for the nights and I don’t want to mess up his naps yet so haven’t tried cot naps yet. The easiest nap of the nap is the first one, so maybe that’s a good place to start.

I got a Rokit on Fb marketplace and it does work on occasion. I still have to walk around to get him down but I can sometimes pop into a quiet cafe and sit down for a bit whilst the rokit is on.
Ive also had periods of beating myself up for all these bad habits, but recently a friend snapped me out of it. You have to do what works for you and your baby, and that’s different for all babies! They do all end up growing out of lots of these behaviours. Sod’s Law they may only want to nap in the cot come summer and we’ll long for pram naps again!

I have a 9 and a 4 yo, so am mercifully out of this stage, but I just wanted to reassure you that this is within the realms of normal, and whilst it's highly frustrating for you both - it's OK, don't beat yourself up.
She will grow out of this and one day it will be a distant memory. ❤️

I developed a real anxiety about naps with my eldest, like proper obsessive PNA, until I spoke to my HV and she really reassured me about sleep, naps, some kids being just shit sleepers.

I wore mine in slings and carriers for much of their baby years, which didn't help tbf, and fed to sleep for nearly all naps and night wakings. OK it wasn't ideal but we all do what we need to get through the day.
I also had dogs so used to walk them at nap time (even in rain) and basically built a routine where they were rarely in a cot for a nap, and then when I needed them to, of course they couldn't!

Gradually I tried different things and at some point they would fall asleep on the walk and I could get home, leave them outside in the pram while I went in to have a cuppa.
Sone days I could sit in the doorway with a drink while baby stayed in the pram. On the days when they'd wake up, I would try to offer another nap later on.

Could you move from 3 to 2 naps yet? Don't worry about the sleep/nap guide amounts as much as how your baby behaves when she is awake, some babies just don't need as much sleep as others, annoyingly!

Thank you all so much for your replies it's nice to know it isn't just me that has had this issue (I mean realistically I know that already but it definitely feels lonely as mum friends are in short supply where I am and I seem to just be walking around alone the majority of the time)

Pod casts are already my saviour at the moment so any suggestions for new ones would be amazing. My current selections are the rest is history and crushed but occasionally go back to the xfm Ricky Gervais ones...

I'm going to invest in better rain wear, a rocket and find some new routes to take. I will keep trying to get naps indoors but that's going to have to wait until I have some better sleep and more patience! That's not today so hopefully the weather improves...

Slings are a game changer if you haven’t tried. Easier to transition from outdoors to indoors because you and your body warmth are a constant.

Also safe bed sharing can be great for naps as well as overnight.

No habits last forever, do what works and be kind to yourself!

Im the same if i can get the down in her cot she has rubbish short naps!!

I actually use an app called footpath for planning marathon training long runs I used to find something on the map that took my fancy or I hadn’t been to and it’ll plot a route I’m seriously considering it for nap time walks too!!

Also audible is my saviour as well as podcasts- I’m catching up on all the books I haven’t got round to reading 🤣

People's lives/consumer

Women's hour
You and yours
Sliced bread - tests is products are really worth it
Life changing - love this people who's lives changed in an instant really inspiring

Money & number - I learn so much!

Money box
Martin Lewis podcast
More or Less

True crime
Bad people - psychologist and comedian look at crimes that "bad people" have done really interesting I would put this as my favourite of the lot!
I'm not a monster

Comedy
Fair cop
Anything on radio 4 in the 6.30pm slot

I listen to these on BBC sounds

Can you park her buggy outside, within view, in your back garden and let her nap outside? Lots of people do this! I would walk for about 10 mins til they drop off, return home and leave buggy in the garden and get on with a few bits inside

I can't seem to figure out how to reply to individual comments 🤦🏻‍♀️

Thank you for your podcast suggestions! I'm about to start bad people now.

I have left her parked up before but unfortunately my rain cover fogs up that much I have to be near her so I can either hear or make out vague movements. Perhaps that's something else I should invest in.. that definitely works on better weather days though.

I think I was just having a sleep deprived flap this morning. I am pretending that she has woken up at the usual time and have started the day again.

If my rain cover was fogging up I'd move it a little so that air was getting in but she was still kept dry

None of them are bad habits, they're just what your baby needs.
DD went through a really bad phase around 6 months and struggled to nap. I would walk around for ages with her in a buggy because she'd started refusing to nap anywhere else.
It was tough so I'm with you and I was in tears most days when I'd try a carrier nap or car nap and she'd scream the whole time.

Now she's 2.5 and she sleep through the night, still a nap refuser but that's just her.

Her brother is 13 months and currently sleeping on me in the carrier.

It will get better even though it doesn't feel like it.

She's still so young at 6 months so none of what you do is a bad habit. The bad weather isn't great for being outside, would she nap in the car?

If you can adjust the raincover a bit for better ventilation, that sounds worth trying. Possibly put it on slightly 'badly' or skew so there's a bit more airflow? Depending how brave you're feeling, you could also try using a hole punch to put a few strategic ventilation holes in the raincover to help with the fogging up. I remember being startled as a new mum just how many ventilation holes ours had, but it did still keep them dry and very rarely fogged up.

Why had I not thought of that 😳 I feel like an idiot lol. I think I was just so worried about waking her I convinced myself I had to be out in the rain because I cant get her in the house without waking.

Thank you. This is definitely worth a try. Even if I have to start her off in the driveway and then I can just leave her out there. I don't drive unfortunately so pram it is until I can get her to nap in her cot.