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Parenting

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AIBU - I’m exhausted!

4 replies

Mumma221 · 27/01/2024 13:50

AIBU here?! My husband has unfortauntely been made redundant and I am now the only earner. I have a good salary, but have to seriously put in the hours (I tend to start at 8am and finish around 9-10pm). We have a two year old and I’m 7 months pregnant.

im absolutely exhausted. While my husband is busy; we’re renovating our house, so much of the childcare still falls on me. He has the ‘freedom’ to just leave the house or go to the gym; where as I’m either tied to my desk or chasing after the toddler. He’s doing everything he can to find another job and make an income so I always feel bad for getting at him, but it’s now been confirmed that I’ll only be able to take 3 months maternity leave because that’s all that’s paid and we can’t afford to not have my income - that’s devastated me. I feel emotional every day as I’d hoped to be able to take longer as maternity leave - it’s the elephant in the room.

I’ve spoken to him about it and tbh, it makes me feel awful bringing it up because I don’t want to put pressure on him (the redundancy was a shock) but equally I’m so exhausted and feel like I can’t really cope - how do I tackle this without being insensitive?! I want him to be happy, but it doesn’t feel as though he wants the same for me (he’s happy to just watch me struggle, there’s been comments like ‘what’s wrong with you’) - HELP!

OP posts:
idontlikealdi · 27/01/2024 14:09

He's not working, he needs to the childcare. The renovation works can be done when the kids are in bed.

Hmmmmaybe · 27/01/2024 14:10

Why isn’t he doing the childcare?

HamSandwichKiller · 27/01/2024 14:18

8am to 9pm isn't sustainable in the long term, let alone factoring in your pregnancy. You need to look at your priorities as a couple. Unless the DIY is focused on getting the house in a saleable condition so you can make money that needs to drop down the list now.

Your DH needs to take on all childcare responsibilities and all household responsibilities too. You should absolutely still help out where you can but the main work should sit with him.

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Quartz2208 · 27/01/2024 14:21

why Does he have the freedom and the childcare all fall to you. If you are working hard to get money he needs to step up

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