Is weaning necessary at 7 months?

[Lotsofmessandstuff]

I have a 7 month old who hasn’t taken to weaning at all, and I’m wondering if it’s necessary. Online advice is confusing as says he doesn’t need anything other than milk until 12 months but other advice is he does.

I am finding it pretty stressful as he isn’t engaging with food at all not even playing with it and cries after just a minute or two in the high chair. I’m wondering whether it might be best just to hold off until he does actually need it or whether wait until he’s closer to 1 as I’m concerned he’s getting negative associations with food?

I think just the fact he’s having absolutely nothing. I thought I was fairly low key and a mouthful of porridge would have been good for me but not getting that. So either he needs it in which case it’s stressful as he won’t have it or he doesn’t in which case it seems pointless as he won’t have any anyway! If he was enjoying the process but not eating much then that’s OK but he hates it, so just worried he’s got negative associations somehow.

We used feeding dummies like this with dd, alongside a combination of finger food and purees. She loved it. Her favourite thing to go inside was cherry tomatoes but we also put blackberries, cut grapes, anything juicy really.

We didn't use this exact one, I can't find the brand we used, but it's the same idea.

Could be worth a try just to bring the fun back into it, you sound like you aren't finding it fun at all!

Ps it was also good when she was teething, I used to put a single ice cube of expressed breast milk in there to suck on.

The whole thingy comes apart and goes in the steriliser, I really recommend them

How is your relationship with your HV? It might be worth getting an appointment and baby assessed to see where you stand with your child.

As I said in a previous post my daughter didn't eat until 13 months she only gained 200g from 7-13 months because of this but we were under a dietician and saw the HV and a paediatrician. For us her other concerns were greater so keeping her breastfeeding was a priority, moving her to formula at 10 months was a priority and then with time the food came once she was having less reactions to foods. Her situation will be different to yours and different to other posters.

I wouldn't necessarily worry at 7 months as it is so early into weaning but the point at which you do worry is baby specific.

Once my daughter was more robust around 9 months and had a few teeth she did better with really big food. She once stole 1/3 of a cucumber from the fridge and took all day eating it. It was only only thing she had eaten in 3 days. Another time it was a full side of an apple. At the opposite end she loved and still does food like peas, sweetcorn and chickpeas that she could pick up one by one.

We did a hybrid of baby led and purees and used to put the puree on slices of toast as an edible spoon at best she sucked it off it mostly got smeared on her face and it took a long time for her to try to eat the toast but it was there alongside something accessible

Something else to consider is the exposure to allergens as these during the first few months of weaning reduces the risks of allergies later. We sometimes had to prioritise exposure to allergens over veg purees especially as we were still early in the process of identifying her allergies

Thanks. I don’t think there’s anything else wrong, it’s more likely I’ve not approached it right which is sort of why I want to reset. I’ve booked into a course about weaning so I’ll do that (it’s next week) and try again after that. He’s not 7 months yet - rounded up a bit - so will assess next week.

The HV suggestion was less about weaning advice and more a weight check and general health check on the little fella. If they are losing or not gaining weight Vs maintaining their current line how much you should fret about weaning will vary!
HVs are also able to refer to dietitian if they do find that there are specific concerns.

My mother once said that babies have control over two things. What goes in their mouth and what they do with what comes out of their body. If you make either (aka weaning or potty training) a battle you will lose.

So sit at the table with the baby with picky food NOT at meal times. Sit at the table and chat. Pop the baby in a high chair and some toys. Sit him there and read to him. Read to him on the floor with a plate of fruit that you eat from. What happens when you go to a restaurant? Presumably he’s been sitting on laps. The more you socialise him AROUND food without worrying about the food aspect then the next stage will come easily (and yes sitting up will make it easier).

Good food habits are not about the quantity of what goes in (if you are playing the long game- I have a 7 and a 12 year old). It’s about meal times being an enjoyable experience and food is only one part of that. My 7 year old is still fussy but we make no comment about it. He sits with us, chats, eats not as much as I would like, might need some encouraging, and then chats some more and we are done. But even in the last year he has tried many many more foods than before because the focus is on him being able to sit with us than what he eats.

In the short term, losing the tongue thrust and sitting up will help but during that time period socialise him into meal times itself. So it’s not something he comes to dread because there is pressure on him. If you have a partner one of you holds him in turn at the table. And yes they wiggle and so on but you keep doing it- 5/7 mins this week, maybe up to 10 mins the week after, and in a month you might find he can sit with you for 15 mins. And he’ll be watching YOU socialise at the table and eat and it will all be slowly percolating into his developing brain.

If he's not 7 months yet, you've only been trying for a couple of weeks?

It's very early days yet. Concentrate on 1 'meal' a day at first. Same time, before milk.
Mine were happier in a bouncer chair at that age rather than a high chair. Got them used to the high chair by using it for activities like painting etc (safe as they couldn't move around covered in paint) but it made the chair fun.

I'm surprised that you can't have him sitting on your lap? Does he never sit on your lap? Sitting on my lap whilst I was eating, or at least at the table whilst others ate, helped with interest in food. Baby would be passed round whilst everyone got a turn to eat.

Mine didn't like food for a long time, and by 1 was still barely eating any and a very fussy eater. Around age 1 she was underweight and anaemic and needed high calorie formula and iron supplements from pediatrician. She only wanted to breastfeed, refused formula, and it was exhausting, If she'd taken to food better it would have been better for everyone. I'm highly sympathetic but also there can be consequences so you should persevere. (Though these consequences might be specific to breastfeeding because there's not enough iron in breastmilk to fully sustain a 1 year old without food).

Oh also I just remembered a tip to encourage eating from our dietician (didn't work for us but sounds good to try). Give a bread stick/other stick and a dip. Don't encourage them to eat. Encourage them to play, show how to dip it, smear it,make pictures, move dip around. Dietician said that some food will accidentally end up in their mouth and if they accidentally like it they'll figure out eventually to direct more towards the mouth. Don't push eating, push handling food and being around it. Sounds messy!

My daughter was same.. exclusively BF.. her first food at 9 months was cauliflower mashed up with breast milk.. just once a day.. then slowly other veg mashed with breast milk.. so she still had the breast milk taste.
But this was 1985.. l know opinions have changed.. but it's your baby.. you do what you think is right.

This is why I avoided baby led weaning and did spoon fed pouches instead . No mess - they had loads of different flavours and textures and now eat everything. Never prepared separate meals for fussy eaters.

Parker - this isn’t about BLWvs purées. It’s just about adapting to solids. I’m not sure it is helpful to turn it into an argy bargy about which method is superior. The best method is the one that suits the parent and baby.

@Seeline on my lap all the time! But I definitely need two hands to hang onto him, he’s very squirmy.

Thanks for the tips. Will update next week.

I wouldn't bother with Solid Starts, I think it is really overengineered and anxiety-inducing. Or if you do, just take it as suggestions not gospel truth.

You should keep offering in various formats, but no stress if he isn't into it. Keep breastfeeding/formula the same.

It's very very early days and I wouldn't be jumping ahead to 12 months because that's an entire lifetime away for him (literally). It's not literally true that they don't need any food at all until 12 months old, but if you start thinking of it like a deadline that he needs to have eaten food by, then it will stress you out and that's not helpful. Just go week by week at the moment.

Is he bringing objects to his mouth to chew on them like toys etc? And can he sit stable when given support e.g. in a pushchair, highchair or on your lap? If he is not doing these things, it might be worth asking GP/health visitor to have a look and check up on his milestones.

In the meantime, try in different settings, e.g. in your lap rather than in the highchair, as a sensory play experience (e.g. offer a raw carrot stick and a breadstick along with some non-edible items for him to pick up and experiment with). Try different times of day - maybe he doesn't want breakfast?

Try putting food near his nose so that he can smell it. Not necessarily something with a very strong smell, but things like mashed potato or steamed carrot or porridge or apple sauce or yoghurt all have a smell for example. Warm buttered toast, roast chicken, cauliflower, slices of ripe pear.

Does he watch you eating or reach for your food when you're eating? If so you could try giving him some of what you're having. Hold him in your lap so he's upright, and try to find a fairly large piece because babies of this age tend to hold with their whole fist and can't yet open the fist to get at what's inside, so you want to think about something they can grasp within their fist which will stick out so they can access the sticking out piece - that's why chip shapes, carrot batons, small triangles of toast work well.

If you want something reassuring to read, try "My Child Won't Eat" by Carlos Gonzales.

Some take it really well like my first I actually weaned her a few weeks early as she was just guzzling the milk and seemed ready. She loved puréed food well out a packet lol didn't like my home made stuff 😂

My second was awful with milk and weaning. She just wasn't that interested she's 4 now and still doesn't eat loads.

I waited a few extra weeks with weaning so started about 6 1/2 months. She refused anything on a spoon so puree foods were out. I ended up giving up and it was stressing me out and there was so much food being wasted. I started again about 7 1/2 months and we did baby led weaning which I really didn't want to do but that's what she wanted. She just progressively got a little better. I did not listen to the advice of my health visitor to reduce her to 2 bottles at 8-9 months old to get her to take more food. It would have been below the minimum recommended amount of milk and she still wldnt have ate any more.

Foods we tried at first were broccoli, carrots, toast then moved on to smashed avocado on toast, pasta and corn on the cob. It's surprising how they can eat proper food when they are so little it is a bit scary and the gag sometimes. Eventually she wld take yoghurt off a spoon but wanted to hold the pot herself and try to feed herself. She made an absolute mess at meal times and maybe ate some or little at times but well u got to start somewhere. By age 1 she was eating 3 meals and we went down to 2 bottles just before that and not long after 1 it was just a bedtime bottle.

In your shoes I'd stop for a couple of weeks and start again and maybe try baby led if baby still won't take from a spoon.

Thanks. He does chew on toys but apparently not food which is a bit frustrating!

He is very close to sitting independently but not quite there yet. Probably linked is why he hates the high chair, he’s constantly squirming and restless and arching his back so he hates the high chair as it prevents these activities!

Not interested in what I’m eating that I’ve noticed.

Sitting independently is not a necessary milestone, and the normal window for this is up to 9 months so it doesn't need to be :) But they do need to be able to sit with support, otherwise it's a choking hazard.

Interesting that he's not watching you eat - mine have been obsessed with this from about 4/5 months. It's quite a common thread too "Should I wean early because baby is watching me eat?" But IIRC the triad of "readiness signs" is supported sitting, interest in food, and bringing toys to mouth.

So perhaps he will be more into it when he gets that interest and currently he's interested in something else. Like all milestones, it would make sense if there was a natural variation between babies. We don't expect them to all walk or roll or sit at the same time.

Maybe. I don’t eat much in front of him so it’s difficult to know!

Have you tried finger food?

Crumpet, toast, bits of fruit?

Porridge is a bit boring

Try raspberries

Yes, thanks - not interested yet (throws on the floor!) No teeth yet so that could be why.

I would forget the high chair for now OP. Maybe turn it into a messy play activity on the floor. So sit with him with a few bits of food and let him play with it. If nothing goes in his mouth fine.
I do remember my first DD not really being into food. I did keep trying and she improved a lot by about 9/10 months.

I think a lot of the 6 months is pushing against the 3/4 month weaning of the past. If he's not sitting up independently that's on of the readiness signs.

Maybe do messy play with food, it might all change in a month or two.

Teeth should not be an issue, they don't get molars for ages anyway and those are the ones which help with chewing.

Can I gently ask why you don't eat very much around him? I had a friend a few years ago who really struggled with disordered eating, when she had her first baby she really struggled with getting him to take solids and I think the fact she rarely ate around him really didn't help. There were so many other things going on with the family in general that I'd never say it was the only issue, but babies are very social in their learning and they do like to watch people and try to copy what they do.

If it's just the way your daytime routine works out, it might be worth making a point of shuffling mealtimes so that your baby is awake and can participate, even if that just means him sitting in the highchair with a toy - he doesn't necessarily have to be eating at the same time as you.

If he's not sitting up independently that's on of the readiness signs.

It isn't, sitting supported is the readiness sign.

I know teeth shouldn’t be an issue but no1 only really started eating when she had molars. Could be similar here. As we do like to say babies haven’t read the books!