Getting a reluctant boy to like crafting

[Bananasinpyjamas1988]

DS is summer born and starting school in September. He’s slightly behind at nursery (they think 3 months which I don’t think is a huge deal). He is a typical boy in that he loves trains, cars and balls but getting him to do anything involving crafting or drawing is impossible. If I ask why he doesn’t like it he says it’s too difficult. He easily gives up if he finds something hard.

Im worried that when he starts school he will be really reluctant to do anything involving writing and drawing, will find it very hard as it becomes a bigger part od the day and lose confidence. Has anyone had a similar situation and how did it turn out? Also does anyone have any tips or toys to get a reluctant boy into this type of thing?

every photo of organized activities at nursery on their app have him in the background playing with a trainset, haha.

Draw/paint with him - so you both do it. Finger painting, collage, stencils of things he likes. Colouring books......may just come in times...

My DS always hated crafts at nursery. He hated getting mucky and was just bored by it - he'd far rather be reading or doing maths or puzzles. I hate craft stuff too so I had a lot of sympathy. It was a long running joke that he'd reluctantly paint one blob and then walk off and do something else. He still doesn't like craft stuff or painting but loves writing at school (he's in Reception). His pen skills were probably a little behind his peers but he's also a summer baby and he's caught up pretty quickly.

Are you are thinking of things to improve his fine motor skills?

Any interest in Lego or construction toys to build train stations/landscapes?

Short sessions to begin with and lots of specific praise - That tunnel really makes your train set look like a real line now, I love the way you painted the bottom green to look like grass, what else can we make that happens near a train line?

For ds I found lots of room and lots of mess was the only answer!!!

I'd concentrate on developing his core strength, so balancing, jumping, lots of time in the playground. And also finger strength, playdo is good for this, doesn't need to be traditional crafts. Between those two strengths, he'll be able to hold his body to support his writing hand when he starts to learn letters at school. He doesn't need to rush.

I don't think not drawing/crafting will keep him behind. He's still very young and some children genuinely don't like this sort of stuff. Encourage drawing/scribbling outside on the ground with chubby chalks. My dd's OT said this is the best way to develop early writing skills. She also said pencil work shouldn't be started before 6, but that is another thread altogether!
ETA: Play doh is also a great way to strengthen hand muscles and improve fine motor skills. Lots of rolling out thick/thin 'snakes' between hands, rolling in a ball between palms etc. You could make trains, train tracks, traffic lights for the trains. Keep it all within his interests.

As others say you don't need to craft to improve skills. However you could make a track for his trains, a station for them to park etc. So try approach it from building something for his toys, that may be a bit of a hook.

Sticker books about his favourite things! Still fine motor control and a "gateway" to arts/crafts.

He can't be that far behind if he's able to answer and understand why questions at 3! DS can't do that at 4!

If the crafting is because you think he "should" do crafting, just let it go.

If it's to help his motor skills, find a way to link it to his interests. Hot Wheels colouring books. Every year Thomas the Tank Engine Magazine brings out one issue where there's a free paint-your-own Thomas toy to paint. Decorating and building a (very simple) cardboard "car hospital" for broken cars to be looked after went down well a few weeks ago with just-turned-4 DS.

You could be describing my DS but to be honest I never really bothered pushing crafts, although he did like to draw train tracks and roads sometimes. But mostly that was directing an adult to draw it for him tbh. He was also not at all interested in books.

He started school and somehow he loves learning the letters and sounds. He’s now also really interested in reading. It’s almost like he can see the purpose of it when he’s expressing himself with letters and numbers rather than just drawing (although he is now also much more into this - perhaps now he is more used to using a pencil and can draw things familiar to him like people).

I agree re playdoh, at his school they do something called doh disco which is all about building strength and dexterity in their hands.

Neither of my sons ever came home from nursery with a painting or picture but they picked up writing just fine. They were keen on activities that strengthen the muscles in hands and arms which helped pick up writing too. Both of them only drew when it was required by school. We aren’t a arty sort of household anyway so I don’t see it as a big deal.

If you do an advanced search on here you will find a list of activities that are good for building the muscles in arms and fingers (gross and fine motor skills) Do you and his dad write and draw much ? If he sees you writing then he might be more likely to pick up a pencil and copy.

My DS loathed any sort of crafts, no interest in Lego, or anything like that. He was absolutely fine with reading & writing, loved maths, good at sports ... never held him back in life ... recently graduated from Uni. Don't worry about it. (He had to choose a 'practical' subject for GCSE & did Food Tech).

Thanks all some very good feedback here. I think a lot of it is because of poor fine motor skills, though it’s not just that. We do lots of gross motor (which he loves) - climbing, soft play etc. Play dough he sometimes tolerates. Throwing a ball he loves. Puzzles he gets very frustrated with. Any other ideas would be most welcome! I think a lot of it is confidence - he’s not got great self esteem as has historically been a bit behind, despite DH and I praising him constantly.

Quite honestly, I'd not worry. Mine just wasn't interested despite a craft filled house, couldn't write a thing before reception. Then it just clicked - he can write, loves crafty things and is always drawing. But yours might just not like craft, and imo that's fine too. My other loves crafting but hates writing. I don't think being good at one is an indication of the other.

I used to be a reception teacher. Honestly I'd just let it go completely op or you'll put him off even more. Stick to reading, outings and toys he likes.

Gross motor skills are connected to fine motor skills so things like park trips are actually integral to his development and not just a bit of fresh air or fun (although that too obviously). Please don't dismiss the outdoorsy stuff or 'non table and chair' activities as a waste because you'd actually be surprised how connected it all is.

Does he like play dough? That's a great fine motor activity.

Just read your update- sounds like you're doing a great job op.

Just a slightly different point of view.
My oldest never painted / coloured etc. Basically never picked up a art implement unless forced.
His writing is awful.
He has dysgraphia. It is actually much harder for him to do these things than typical kids.
Occasionally he would draw in chalk or paint with water on the patio.
His lowest predicted GCSE's are in English - and are still 6s.
Writing neatly (after primary school!) isn't the only way you can succeed.

He doesn't need to be interested in crafts, I wouldn't push it.

If you're worried about his fine motor control there are loads of activities to train this online without them necessarily being writing/drawing. Have a look at these for example (I really love her approach in general).

www.occuplaytional.com/category/by-domain/fine-motor/

I wouldn't worry too much about crafting, my DD absolutely loves crafting and drawing but it's still taken 9 months of preschool before she's taken any sort of interest in writing her name (and now she's autographing everything in sight). She's 4 in March so a little bit older than your DS and this has literally only happened since Christmas - literally before Christmas not a single interest in attempting to write her own name.

Our nursery teacher said rather than the action of writing/drawing it's the building of the muscles and learning the fine motor skills that's more important, so lots of playdoh, using things to grip other items and sort them etc.

If you did want a crafting activity your DS might like however, you could try dipping his trains/cars in paint and showing how they make tracks when rolled on paper. I've done this before with DD and it went down a treat, basically I've drawn something on a sheet of paper and she's rolled a car dipped in paint over the lines to "trace" the object.

My DS has always hated art and crafts

He did a bit a school as they all do and seemed to enjoy getting stuck in there

He'd get DD to do all his art homework at secondary school

He'd do DDs maths homework in return

Lego and Meccano are great for hand eye and brain coordination.

Only one of my 3 DC enjoyed Art. All enjoyed Sport far more.

If you are worried about fine motor skills etc. then try and find things that work with his interests. I hate crafts, always have. I have one child who hates them too so I sympathise.

If he's finding fine motor skill-based activities too hard, it generally means he needs more work on his gross motor skills. Things like painting outside with a big brush and a bucket of water, pavement chalks, "writing" on the ground with a bucket of water with a hole in it...it's not uncommon for little boys to need a lot more gross motor activities before they develop the readiness for fine motor activities and pre-writing skills. Unfortunately the government wants four and five year olds writing whether they are developmentally ready or not, so lots of little boys learn to hate and fear writing before they even have a chance to learn it.

Does he have a favourite character that you can get hold of a colouring book, activity book. Lego is a wonderful toy for children especially the free play sets.

If he is working in n any medium he is getting practice. Don't worry children are spiky learners and are more likely to want to engage in a task with a friend to please teacher.

@Bananasinpyjamas1988 My DS is similar but younger. Colouring books of cars, diggers, trains. I use felt squares to make our own fuzzy felt sets of different vehicles, including some of the engine and parts etc. Cut out and draw/make our own train tracks. We make ‘cargo’ out of play doh, felt, pom-poms to then play with with all the vehicles etc. Use the themes he loves to your advantage. Also we do a guessing game where we draw things (normally vehicles) and then guess what we are drawing. Encourages him to use the pencil pens etc. Here is something we made today 😀 good luck!!