Doesn't want our child more but wants full custody?

[oneanddonee]

We've got a schedule in place for our 4 year old son. Exh sees him every other weekend. I keep Wednesday evenings open for him for the weekend he doesn't have him but he rarely takes this opportunity up due to his work commitments.

He recently got married and his new wife is very hands on with our son and that's good to hear however he has recently proposed our son lives with him and goes to primary school in their town and grows up there (40 mins away) I don't believe this is suitable as he's only turned 4 less than a week ago and has only known a life living with me. (We left when he was 2)

I offered meeting in the middle (imho) by offering more weekend time as he wants to see his dad more too but hading over full physical care to his dad feels like a change too big for a child this young. Even if our son loves time at his dad's.

Could I take this to mediation? Nursery have also told me our son would love more time with his dad and it's effecting his behaviour too. I'm not sure how to go about this. Please help.

I wouldn't even entertain anything outside of the court order op. Your son loves the version of the father he's receiving. Its perfectly ok for kids to miss the abusive non resident parent.. that's all they know. I personally would stick to the court order. Don't offer more. You went to court for a reason. When your son is 11, you can review again

I would be very concerned that your ex is manipulating your son to the point that this has happened. Goodness knows what is going on when he is there with his Dad.

Absolutely stick to your guns. If he wants to fight for him you'd be getting letters from his solicitor. Does he want to fight for him so much that he wants to pay CM and solicitor fees..? I wonder.

I think you need to seek professional support and advice
Crying in bathroom is extreme , what was he expressing? He is too young to be saying oh i wish i saw my dad more.... and why would he cry at nursery?
Ask for referral to family therapy.
It might involve dad as well but to put child at centre
and crying for his dad does not mean you are doing anything wrong

Plenty children have dads working away and woukd not be crying in bathroom over it...if he sees dad regularly a quick you will see dad in two weeks should be enough

Children normally get more obsessed by for the parent that is less available.

You are his safe heaven and ALWAYS available, that’s why he doesn’t cry for you at nursery, he doesn’t need to, he knows you always appear at the end of the day.

You can take it to mediation to start with, as long as he is not controlling, otherwise us pointless. But bear in mind that Disney dads are only great in small so, if he is one beware.

The stepmum might be great but you never know how will she become once she has her own child. That’s a lottery.