Advice on how to get some sleep as an exclusively breastfeeding mum

[CAMU1]

My newborn is 3 weeks old, and the lack of sleep is really taking its toll. I know being sleep deprived is part of being a parent, but it’s getting to a point of constant headaches and dizziness due to lack of sleep.

I’m unable to nap during the day and ‘sleep when baby sleeps’ as she will only have contact naps. My partner is out of the house for work between 7am and 6pm, and I’m alone for the day - unfortunately I don’t have additional support/spare hands to cuddle baby while I go for a nap, so nighttime is my only sleep time.

I’d like some advice on how to fit in extra sleep - I know I must be doing something wrong, so here is a ‘typical evening’

6pm - husband comes home from work, we eat tea
7pm - feed baby (exclusively breastfed and not pumping as recommended by midwife, due to feeding issues when born. She takes about an hour to feed, she’s quite slow)
8pm - husband takes baby while I go for a shower and get ready for bed
9pm - watch tv/spend time with husband
10pm - change, feed, burp
12am - change, feed, burp
3am - change, feed, burp
6am - change, feed, burp
After this feed she is ‘awake’ so won’t go back to sleep in her cot. That’s when the day ‘starts’

My breastfed baby is now 13 months and still up around the times you’ve said so I’d say that’s pretty good for a 3 week old.
I used to go to bed at 7 though when baby went down as that was always the longest stretch. Yeah you don’t see dh for a few weeks but it’s not forever. I still go to bed at 9ish now as a year down the line the constantly broken sleep is hard!

It's early days for you but I only fed to sleep at night and the bedtime feed then fed upon waking in the day so I was settling DC in the cot for naps, that way I could have a nap or do other things. It's easier to get them used to it when they're tiny and sleeping more and falling asleep easier. Before they become more alert and won't settle for a few pats and shushes. This was DC2 btw I was trying to improve upon my DC1 experience where I didn't have a clue

Cosleeping following the safe sleep seven, and check out UK Cosleepers on Facebook for safety advice to get your setup right. Learn to feed side lying. If you're really nervous get an Owlet sock which work well for cosleeping.

Plus don't change nappy after every night feed, only if baby has pooed.

You lose your evenings for a while and go to bed at 7. I used to get DH to give the baby a bottle of formula at 9/10 to give me an extra long chunk of sleep but if you’ve had feeding issues or want to do EBF I guess that might not be an option.

Co sleeping.
Feeding lying sideways. You might even roll away in the day time for a quite lunch.
Baby carrier for cot act naps so you can do stuff while she sleeps.
I did not get out of bed for nappies at night! OH did those.

Does she actually need need burping? (I appreciate that the answer could be a definite yes) If not, try co sleeping safely and let your self have some rest.
Sleep deprivation is utterly grim- keep up the good work.

Those days are awful but it does end!

I second what pp said about co sleeping and early bedtime.

I'd also say that feeling rested is not entirely about sleep. Are you drinking enough, getting in some fresh air, having a walk in the day, eating fairly healthy food? It's easy to get dehydrated, survive on biscuits and get glued to the sofa but that'll make exhaustion worse.

If you can find other mum friends, it can also break up the monotony and loneliness a bit.