Breastfeeding past 6 months questions

[LeMoax]

Hey I have a 3 month old DS who is bf exclusively. Breastfeeding luckily has gone smoothly
from the start. Latched well , no weight issues etc.

I come from a family of formula feeders so feel I’ve got nobody to ask. Even though Breastfeeding has gone well, I’m now at the 3 month mark and finding the burden of it all being on me tough. He feeds every 3 hrs , which I know isn’t even a lot compared to some mums. My problem is I don’t like the idea of anyone else apart from my partner feeding him (?hormones), and I feel I’ve got this far with breastfeeding now. Husband does help with giving expressed bottles now and again.

I never had any idea of when I would stop as I didn’t really expect it to go so smoothly until this point.

my question is - what can I expect if I continue past 6 months? Do the feeds drop off dramatically when start weaning? Or will it be same as it is currently? Sorry I’m clueless. Thank you

It will drop off slowly, especially when you first start weaning as they don’t eat much. There will be times when they’re teething and ill and will only want milk again and no food. Some babies suddenly stop feeding but others need gentle encouragement to eventually stop feeding all together if you decide to stop before they do.

My first was mostly ff and she was given 1 bottle which was not from me or DH. Just because you bottle feed doesn’t mean everyone gets to give it a go.

They become much faster and effective at breast feeding. I didn’t notice much of a drop off once weaning, but I did become more disciplined about timings so that they were hungry for food. It’s lovely, some of my best memories. I stopped at 1 year as was going back to work.

I breastfed one child to 2 and the other to 3.

I found it does drop off a little after weaning, but like a pp I also had to put some discipline in place around timings to ensure they were eating food (which is easier when they are a little older than it is when they are only 3 months). It also helps if they will take a bottle/ cup from others- one child would take a bottle, and the other a sippy cup. As they get closer to one, as it was a one off I would leave them with cows milk rather than expressed milk which took the pressure off a little in terms of having to express, and increased the freedom I could have.

The hardest bit for me was 12-18 months and returning to work. They coped without breast milk in the day, but made up for it in the night! I was on my knees with exhaustion, and cracking night weaning was the key. Once they were over 18 months and feeds dropped to basically morning and bedtime, no night feeding etc. then it was no hassle.

I would say extended feeding does require a little commitment and for me still required a little personal sacrifice of freedom, but I felt it worth it. Also remember - it doesn't have to be all it nothing. They will be eating food, you can add in formula etc. Whatever suits you.

I didn't talk about feeding with others. I found people had weird reactions around extended feeding, so kept it to myself. But I have found subsequently that it is probably more common than you think, but similarly people don't talk about it.

Good luck with whatever you choose

Thank you - this is all really helpful. Sorry to be basic but can I ask what do you mean when you say discipline around timings in practice? @DanceToTheMusicInMyHead @Whattodo2024

For me the discipline in timings means I do a feed as soon as he wakes in the morning (sometime between 6-7am), and an hour later give him breakfast (7-8am). I’ll feed him after his first nap and then an hour later he has lunch, feed after 2nd nap at least an hour before his dinner and then a bedtime feed.

For us, having this structure means he’s hungry enough for meals. I do feed in the night if he wakes but that is pretty rare.

He also only takes a few minutes to feed, it’s way less time consuming than it was when he was tiny.

I didn’t introduce any kind of structure until we’d been weaning a few weeks I should add.

So in the morning when they wake I’d take them straight down for porridge first, then they’d get a breast feed after. So food first, boob after. Otherwise mine would happily live on breast milk. I also breast fed them after naps rather than before, so they lost the breast feed to sleep association.

OP I wanted to Hf to 6 months but by that point I found it actually easier to keep going than to stop. I eventually stopped at about 20 months. I does drop off when they start weaning but slowly. I wouldn’t worry much about structure unless you find baby isn’t much interested in food for a long time as always full on milk.

If you like a schedule I think you might find it easier once he starts weaning. I have absolutely no idea how often my 7mo feeds on a given day, I come from a EBF family so I have always fed on demand and followed an “if in doubt whack a tit out” approach and I can really struggled to navigate a solids routine with weaning because of that. With my eldest I went away for a weekend at about 10 months and came home to a routine. Eg I had 3 times a day I’d give him milk and the rest of the time it was solids or cuddles only (3 meals and snacks as wanted). As for stopping BF I had a “don’t offer don’t refuse approach” and he weaned at 12.5mo. Agree with PP about them wanting more milk when poorly.

I wouldn't say either of my children ate much food at all til 9 months so just be aware at 6 months solids can mean tiny, tiny amounts.

My boy is 2 and he has pretty much been breastfed whenever he wants and it's convenient for me. Ie not in the middle of asda or on a walk but at home, fine.
Recently I've started saying no and redirecting him and his feeds have reduced dramatically.

The main thing to remember is that milk has far more calories than weaning food (eg pureed pear) so if you do want to drop breastfeeding, make sure you give formula.
I would think though that the faff of bottles would be prohibitive to me, breastfeeding especially now you're in the swing of it.
You might find he doesn't feed a lot some days, other days it's more, won't feed if you're at a playgroup but will if you're at home and bored.

Breastfeeding is amazing when an older baby is sick/teething and refuse anything else. My boy was sick for about a week in the summer. Ate nothing, but one small ice lolly on day 3 and a tiny bit of yogurt/jelly/juice every second day or so. But he breastfed and so his hydration, nutrition and antibodies were not a concern for us.

My son is 13 months and ebf. Like you, I had a very simple journey. He didn't start eating much of drinking water until 9 months and since then feeds have reduced. He feeds to sleep for his two naps per day, feeds to sleep for bed and in the night. Always has a feed around 5am but food for the rest of the time. I've just started to introduce a snack which has led him to need less milk, though if he's teething an unwell, he chooses to bf more than eat food.

In contrast, I was unable to bf my eldest and she was ff. So much more faff formula feeding than breastfeeding! They get more efficient and quicker at breastfeeding and won't always want it on tap. My son cluster fed until 4 months old and then we had longer stints between feeds. 3 months is still very little. If I were you, I'd stick with it until 7 months and then see how you feel.

My baby is 8 months and I would say she started having less milk once we started on two meals a day. Now she knows she's getting breakfast, she will rarely have milk in the morning.

I always offer as soon as she wakes up and before breakfast but she seems to have just decided it isn't for her in the mornings anymore. (I have spoken to HV about this and they have no concerns as she feeds during the night - something I need to wean her off!) I usually express and either use the milk on her Weetabix or pop it in the freezer.

Just bear in mind that if you choose to stop around 6 months, they can't have cows milk as a drink until 12 months, so baby will need to move to formula.

I wouldn't say it got easier after weaning but it did get easier between 3 and 6 months. She went from feeding every 90 minutes to doing some 3-4h chunks during the day and it was more predictable. So we got up I had breakfast then she had a feed. She went for a nap and had a feed and so on.

We switched to formula at 10 months it was easier in some ways but probably on balance harder overall. My daughter didn't respond to weaning until 13 months so she was still very much a milk fed baby at 13 months.

I did try to get combifeeding working at 8 months for my wellbeing and I very much think that I wouldn't have had to stop breastfeeding for my health if I had managed to get combifeeding. If I said switch the expressed bottles to formula bottles would you feel relieved or sad? If it's relief do it!

Discipline in timings - for me that meant moving from the "if in doubt whap a tit out" approach (love that description!) to more structured timings. So for us that might be when wake up/before breakfast, after lunch/before afternoon nap, after nap/before tea and before bed. So less on demand- gave me more a sense of control. And that also changed over time- different timings and approach at 8/9 months to 18 months. Usually feeding more when poorly though.

Stopping feeding was led by me. For DC1 I was pregnant, and with DC2, after 3 years I was done. With both I did it around birthdays - talked about how when you turn 3 you will be such a big boy, won't need milk anymore. Gradually talking about it in lead up and then cold turkey on their birthday. Worked like a treat with both.

I fed my first till she was 2 and a half - it got much, much easier after she was 4 months old. Hang in there for another month and it suddenly gets way easier. The baby's mouth grows larger so doesn't pinch the nipple. Feeds are also way quicker after about a year old - a few minutes of big gulps and that's basically it each time.

I never bothered with timed breastfeeding routines though. Just fed on demand wherever we were. I joined the Facebook group "can I breastfeed in it" for ideas on wearing wrap tops, or buttoned shirts etc so my boobs were accessible.

Fwiw I was also the first member of extended family who bf for so long but no one commented. I live in London and got maybe two funny looks in total in the whole 2.5y.

It's actually way easier than bottles when you're out and about because there's no sterilising or anything to carry. The only thing to consider is what to wear. You can feed anywhere - on the bus, in a cafe, park bench. So many times I just had to perch on someone's garden wall. You can even do it with the baby in a sling/carrier.

Ps I'm a big fan of mixed feeding though, like a pp said above, do consider quitting expressing and just have one formula bottle a day for your dh to give.

I'm doing that now with ds (1 month old) - dh gives a bottle of formula so I can have 1-1 time with my dd each evening for her bedtime.

Imo it's way more sustainable to mixed feed. I'm a strong believer that 2+ years of mixed feeding is more beneficial than 3-6 months of EBF then quitting (which seems to be the norm in the uk)

Edit - by more beneficial, I mean both for the baby and for the mum's quality of life!

The feeds drop to less and less because at some point they don’t ‘need’ them in the same way anymore, it’s more about comfort and supplementing nutrition (I think even toddlers get way more vitamins and nutrients from your breastmilk then they would just food). An older baby could be in nursery all day and just have one feed a day and you’d still have milk.

For me, feeds dropped but gradually, or for a while there would be a similar amount of feeding, but with different timing. So if DH got up with DC and give them breakfast etc while I lied in, they might go 4-5 hours without milk, but then want it every hour or two in the afternoon. It did also mean I could fit feeds in when it was convenient, so I could give them a snack on the way home and feed a little later, instead of having to find somewhere to stop and sit down to feed.

By about 7 months I was on a set 4 times a day schedule. First thing, mid-morning, mid-afternoon and last thing.

At 11 months I swapped the mid-morning one for a snack, at 12 months the mid-afternoon for cow's milk and then cow's milk again for the first and last things ones at 13 and 14 months.

We had gone through all the palaver of getting DC1 to take a bottle so I could go to a hen do when he was about 4 months. It was an absolute pain, I hated pumping, it took weeks of trying before he was interested. I couldn't be arsed at all with DC2 and never even tried. BF was much easier and it did drop off loads as soon as we started weaning.

My baby is 7 months, and I always thought I’d start moving to combi feeding at 6 months, but it’s so easy that I’m sticking with breastfeeding for the majority! He has formula every other night when my husband does bed time (expressing is too much like hard work now!), and I sometimes give him a bottle when I’m out (he can be really distracted when breastfeeding out of the house), but otherwise it’s boobs 😆 he’s in the early stages of weaning so the feeds are still pretty regular, but much much shorter than at the beginning. I remember the 45 minute feeds on the sofa, but those days are long over now.

My daughter is almost 8 months and we are down to 4 breastfeeds a day along with food. She also does a full feed in around 15 minutes

babies adapt. At 8 months I was out for 4h working. I fed before I left, and then again when I got home. My boobs were bursting to start with but both they, and baby adapted their schedules.
Fed til 20 months including going back to work 13h a day.
It all adapts.

I fed both mine to 9 months. Started mixed feeding from 6 months, slowly... finally I just BF morning and before bed- and it all just stopped naturally and without any fuss. I found BF so much easier when going out, travelling, holidays- always there, no need to all the bottles, sterilising, etc.

Thank you everyone - this has been reassuring and definitely makes me think I’ll continue until 8 months or so and then reassess again. Thank you x