Do I need a stair gate for nearly 3yo?

[LuckyFlash]

DS is almost 3. We are removing the sides of his cot bed this week so he will be able to roam around. DH is insistent that we need to out a stair gate up but I’m not sure if it’s necessary so keen to get thoughts on whether stair gates are required for this age. For context:

• we have never had one at the top of the stairs, only at the bottom as stairs are in our lounge and we wanted to stop DS going up when he was learning to walk. This gate has been gone for 6 month or so
• the only place to put a stair gate would be across his bedroom door - I don’t really feel great about trapping him in there and also don’t want to ruin the door frame (I know you can get tension ones but we’ve had one before and it still did a load of damage)
• both his room and ours are basically right at the top of the stairs. There is also a single step between his room and our room - this is the bit that worries DH
• we have a sensor light outside his room which would come on if he leaves his room at night to help him see
• he’s very confident with the stairs. I do tend to watch him still but I have no worries about him going up and down on his own
• the main worry for DH is him falling while sleepy and disorientated

am I being blasé about safety or is DH being OTT?

I think your DH is right to be honest, even just for peace of mind. My DD is 3.5 and had a stairgate on her bedroom door from when the cot bars came off. If she wants to come out she just calls to us and we open it, at least we know she can't blunder about in the dark without us knowing.

I'm in a similar boat to you and tbh my only real concern is midnight wandering while half asleep at the top of stairs. My son is only 2.5, but we put a stairgate on the door of his room. Maybe I'm being overcautious, but that's how we're going to play it in this instance.

We have kept ours. During the day it's propped open with a door finger guard and it's only closed at night just in case any of us go stubbing down the stairs in the night. My mum fractured her back last year and 12 months on still isn't back to normal mobility so we definitely going on the cautious side.
There's no gate at the bottom of the stairs and hasn't been since her first few weeks of crawling

We have one at the top of the stairs.
It's partly for safety and partly as a deterrent to getting out of bed!

Thanks all! I’ll go and tell DH he right (and to put the stair gate up haha)

How close might he be to nappy free nights? He will need bathroom access then, so bedroom door stair gates no use at that point.

I'd go with lighting and no stair gates.

I haven't had stair gates up since my twins were around 2 and a half probably slightly earlier ... they were out of cot beds at 1...
My twins navigate a similar layout in the dark to find my bed in the middle of the night

I think it’s good idea for the cot -> bed transition as limits the new found freedom and hopefully stops anytime bedtime messing around! Definitely on his bedroom door though not on the stairs and I wouldn’t leave it up for long- over 3 and there’s too big a risk of them climbing over and getting hurt and you also need to allow access to the loo.

You removed staircase just after they started crawling? That's when I've started closing mine for baby.

Definitely still keep shut for my just turned 2yr old too, tho she's been doing stairs OK for months, one of us generally right behind her, as v occasional with lapse of attention or trying something silly, or just reaching for something she's dropped on the way down and losing balance means she tumbles

Yes. Keep it

We only used the one at the bottom of the stairs for a few weeks. She showed no interest in the stairs at all. The gate was physically there for a year if we needed it but tied open

At 3.5 my youngest went into the bottom
Bunk of s bunk bed with his brother in the top., our bathroom and toilet is downstairs too so no stairgates for us!

We kept our top of stairs one until our youngest was around six. They are very close to our bedroom door and after bad dreams he used to leg it towards them to come to us in bed. I was terrified he'd misjudge the distance or doorway and go headfirst down them.

I'd have a gate for now. If he's been in a cot up to this point, you don't know if he sleepwalks yet. You don't want to find out he does when you find him at the bottom of the stairs.