When your child NEVER gets chosen

[rollonretirementfgs]

I am so gutted for my DD11, she has never been chosen for a part in a school concert or play, or sports event. She just isn't one of those children who pushes herself to the front like some. Recent auditions for school production, dd has been so excited to get a part. Rehearsing all week. Parts were given out yesterday. All the main parts given to the same children as in the Christmas play. Dad given a chorus part AGAIN. I feel like the teachers are most interested in looking good and putting on a great production, rather than being aware of the feelings of the children. What would you do in this situation? I feel so sad for my little girl and have no explanation for why she never gets chosen?

If she wants to perform I would find her a nice inclusive out of school theatre group to join. Local Am Dram societies are usually a good place to start.

I never relied on school for opportunities in sport or acting or anything like that because they are very often short sighted and the same kids get picked for everything and I say that as a parent whose child was picked for everything. Every sports thing, drama thing, school council etc and he wasn't even bothered about any of them really and it got to the point he was never in school for a full week as constantly out of school to compete etc.

Its one of the shit parts of being a parent
, i had this with my son who tried really hard but was never picked for anything.
Just had to remind him that he really is a brilliant person. And how it was ok to be sad/dissapointed, but the fact he keeps trying made me so proud.
Reminded myself, it teaches him resillance,
And i just ensured we did lots of things he enjoyed out of school.

You sound like a lovely mum, im sure your dd will be fine 🙂

Why do you think your child always got chosen? Was it talent? Or likability? My dd is such a good girl, kind, popular, good at sports. None of the chosen kids are particularly talented in performing arts, and neither is she. But I can't work out why she doesn't get chosen?

Thank you ❤️

Is she a bit plain? Often plain, well behaved children just get sort of forgotten about.

I dont know but I think maybe because he was very good at one particular sport and the school benefitted from this and then he just became the kid who did things and they knew they could rely on him. Not that they couldn't rely on others but I think he was just the easy option if you see what I mean.

Plain??? No she isn't plain! Her school reports describe her as charming and charismatic!

I feel sorry for some kids that dont get chosen it seem the popular kids get picked all the time.
Teachers do have their favorites.

And then again, some kids are extremely talented.

My dc was one of those who got picked for anything and everything. I don't know why, but I suspect:

1. She was always very confident so perhaps stood out more as a "safe choice" - even things as simple as being able to project her voice effectively.
2. She was very good at following instructions and remembering what she had to do, so probably quite low maintenence as far as the teachers were concerned.

3.She had a good attitude - consistent, hardworking, reliably turned up for practices etc.

1. She was good at helping/teaching other kids who were less sure about what they had to do.

Not saying it's fair, just saying why I think they regularly picked her.