Deflated after 9month hv review

[Mummio92]

Feeling a bit upset after my 9mo’s review with the HV today for a few reasons:

• told he needs a GP check and HV follow up because his head measurement has jumped up 2+ centiles since birth
• length today put him in 2nd centile which makes me worry about his growth as we are average height parents
• need a call back check in a couple of months as he isn’t yet showing signs of moving (no crawling or pulling up etc) at all

Feel like there’s always something with my baby, he had viral meningitis right after birth, has had so many colds and bugs, teethes really badly, is under urology for a problem (since birth) that will require surgery in the next 12 months.

I love him with every bit of me, but also sometimes feel so unlucky that it never seems smooth for us and that I end up having to be in a constant state of worry.

Not sure what I’m looking for but maybe somebody has faced some of these difficulties and has advice to share.

Yes some children don't hit the milestones but the time to worry about babies not crawling or walking is not at 9 months when it's still totally normal for babies not to be mobile.

My DD is 11months and not crawling or pulling to stand. At our review the HV said not to worry until 15months. So at 9months you've got loads of time.

Think of it as good he gets extra checks as you don't have to worry about keeping an eye on those things as they will be checked again.

DD1 didn't move till 11 months.

DD2 was below 2nd centile - I am average and DH is tall.

Both fine.

All babies hit milestones differently. Elder ds was walking at 9 months, younger ds was no where near crawling at 9 months and it took him ages to walk. No idea about head measurements but please do not worry.

At nine months DD had a big head (still does 12 years later to be fair). One HV and a random doc in the hospital mentioned it was an issue. I ignored them as did not think it was. She's fine. If it's a really rapid growth and a definite out sized head, fluid on the brain could be a cause for concern so nothing wrong with checking with GP. But most babies it's just a big bonce.

At 9 months DD was not rolling over or anything. Then between 10-12 months she rolled, crawled, cruised and walked! She's a brilliant runner now 😊

Also, look up head circumference inaccuracy. It's actually very difficult to measure a head and get the right spot every time so head measurements can vary drastically.

Very grateful for all the replies, didn’t expect so many, it’s incredibly reassuring to hear that these issues seem to crop up frequently.

The health check just compares to average. So obviously some will / some won't do various things. And a month or two can make all the difference. My eldest had a massive head, and still does! Just like her dad. I think at 1 she was in 6/7 year old hats.
It's good that they want to see him again, because if there is anything of concern still at 12 months they'll obviously be able to intervene and help more swiftly being on the radar, but chances are you'll be pulling your hair out because he's cruising and climbing if not running about! My eldest was a talker not a walker, so sentences at 1 but not independently walking till about 14 months.

Do keep doing all that you do, and don't forget to talk to him and have 'conversations' - leave room for him to answer back. (I do see so many people out for a stroll with the buggy/in a cafe etc, mum on the phone no interaction with child)

It sounds like you've had a worrying time with your LO, but try not to worry about this!

It's good that these possible issues have been flagged up so that your LO can be checked, isn't it?

I wouldn't worry about the lack of moving. How many adults do you know that can't move? He will be fine.

He may be a little delayed after all his illnesses - if a baby is teething or coldy or seriously ill, they won't be in the right frame of mind to attempt things like rolling and crawling.

Hi OP,

first of all it’s really normal and okay to feel like this, it makes me safe sometimes to that we go through so much and my son has to deal with so much.
For context my eldest DS has special needs and had lots of medical problems from birth and a few operations, I spend a lot of time at appointments and checks or in meetings at the school too. It’s a lot to process, a lot of worry and stress, sometimes I get upset when I see other families doing the things we aren’t necessarily able to or just not having to worry about all the extra bits we do. (I don’t mean this unkindly to anyone who doesn’t have these issues and I wouldn’t change my son for the world)
My second DS was an absolute chunk at his 9 month review and yet he is my littlest now, whereas my eldest was teeny tiny and low centiles and is now off the charts tall and also has a larger than average head 🤷🏼‍♀️

as an ex early years professional please be assured that milestones are general guides, every child is different and learn things at their own pace and if they struggle support is available to you all. Don’t be put down by these things if you can, it’s hard not to worry but it sounds like your doing great x

edited to make sense

Hi OP, sorry you’ve had a tough time! Your little one sounds so sweet and it’s hard seeing them poorly with all the colds and bugs. We also got referred because of baby’s head size and I found it such a worry. The GP made me panic more and I hated having his head measured all the time. Thankfully he is fine, and like others have said it was just an abundance of caution. I just wanted to say that mine was a late roller, crawler and is yet to walk at 15 months - I really think it’s harder for them to get moving when they have a bigger head!

Just wanted to share an update for anyone who reads this and was in a similar boat.

It’s looking like all is fine regarding my baby’s larger head- he’s been checked by paeds and scanned and no concerns have been raised so it’s almost certainly genetic. Head growth has also stabilised.

He’s just turned 11 months now and very recently started crawling. I had him checked by a paediatric physio who said he’s typically developing and just doing things in his own time, likely focusing on babbling over moving. They mentioned that he is more flexible than the average baby but still within normal range, and this means he needs to be stronger in his muscles when he moves to make up for the flex in his joints.

Illnesses have calmed down & he now copes with teething much better. Is all round a very happy chappy.

Thank you to all who responded at the time of the original post. The messages were really thoughtful & reassuring.

Great news, glad to hear your little man is doing well.