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Parenting

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Dp tough love or no love with ds?

1 reply

mamamia89 · 07/01/2024 22:37

My dp and i have very opposite parenting styles. Im more gentle parenting and he's more one chance only and there's instant consequences. For example our ds 7 is really difficult atm. We're currently waiting for him to be assessed for adhd. My ds tantrums really bad, he screams, shouts, back chats, throws himself on the floor, throws things. But theres always a trigger for these outbursts. I think he struggles to regulate his emotions. Which is one of the reasons i believe it's adhd. When he's having one of his (many) moments, i will try to talk to him and calm him down and get him to explain why he's feeling this way, im very patient. Dp will hear him 'tantrum' and immediately put him in his room slamming his door shut and tells him to not come back out. He shows no affection towards ds and ds seems to easily annoy dp. But then like i said, im more patient and can tolerate his behaviour a lot more. Am i looking to much into it? Does it sound like tough love or no love?

OP posts:
Kaybee93 · 07/01/2024 22:50

It sounds like you’re doing the right thing and DH is dealing with things in the way he thinks are right. Have you read “The complete guide to therapeutic parenting by Jane Mitchell and Sarah naish or Parenting from the inside out by Daniel J Siegel. I’ve listened to them on audiobook and it’s actually really helped me think more about how and why I react the way I do to DS1 and DS2. There’s also this guy called Gabor Mate who talks about ADHD etc. I’m not saying it to shove information at you, I just mean they have YouTube shorts etc and some of them have great tips that make you think.

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