So my 4 nearly 5 year old has always been pretty easy. But since his younger brother came along, and he started school it's like we missed the terrible twos and they're hitting age 4.
It's all pretty standard, nothing I don't see in other children on the school run. But I would like him to speak to people a bit more politely.
I'm pretty sure he's picking up on how me and DH speak to each other and copying our tone.
DH isn't verbally abusive or anything like that, but he does often talk to me like an apathetic teenager and like I'm the most annoying person in the world. I'm also quite snappy and impatient at times too. We're sleep deprived with the 1 year old and in that exhausting toddler phase as he's just started walking and is into everything. And I've just gone back to work so we're navigating all these things with not much time for ourselves, so we do tend to give each other our worst. And in front of the kids.
Now I really want to make an effort to address this, and lead by example how we would like DS1 to speak to people/us and for me and DH to be on the same page.
But he totally doesn't agree. He's adamant how he speaks to me is totally fine and he should be able to challenge me or be grumpy if he wants and won't budge on it. He makes the effort for the kids and is wonderful with them, but not with me.
It drives me insane because I just want us to both try harder with each other but he's not on board.
I've tried just working on myself but it makes no difference to how he is with me, and then it upsets me more when he's grumpy and I've made the effort not to be.
I also feel like DS1 speaks to me badly because of it at times.
Any suggestions or ideas?
Other than that we work well together but I really really don't like the situation but can't seem to do anything about it.