So I just want to see what other people's opinions are on this. Apologies for how long this will be, haha!
My ex-husband and father to 2 of my children has been asking since September what the plans are for Xmas this year (last year he should have had them xmas eve into xmas day but chose not to and took them xmas day into boxing day then dropped them home). For context, our relationship is very changeable. I try and stay amicable. However, this can be hard due to his nature, sarcastic remarks, or just being plain rude to me, depending on his mood and then how I react (its not always easy to remain nonchalant/unbothered by him). Everytime he mentioned it I'd say the same "it's your turn to have them on Xmas eve into Xmas morning and then I'll have them for Xmas Dinner" we would then arrange different days etc throughout the holidays as previous years. So this went on right up until about 3/4 weeks ago when he asked me again, and I said the same thing and his reply was "no, I've booked to take them away from 23rd to the 29th of Dec" he plans to take them somewhere that's an 8hour round trip. I proceeded to ask him why he has bothered asking me the plans if this is the case. I asked him about when i'm supposed to see the kids over xmas, and he suggested driving them down on xmas day and then back up. When I told him I thought that was ridiculous, he asked me if i was happy not to see them on xmas Day ... at that point, i told him i wasn't happy and that if I had done that to him, he would be kicking up hell. To suggest i dont want to see my children on xmas day is beyound a joke. I personally think that it is ridiculous to suggest a 10yr od and 7yr old would want to do that/or be happy to do that on xmas day.
AIBU to think what he has done is just an absolute d*ck move here. Would you expect your kids to do an 8-hour round trip on xmas Day or think that's fair?
I have spoken to a few friends and family about this, and each person has said similar things about how they wouldn't allow this to happen and definitely would not be happy. I also felt the reason he continued to ask is because he wants me to tell him "no" so he can tell my children that he has all these wonderful things planned and I've stopped them doing this (wouldn't be the first time he has said things like that to them). Any advice or feedback would be very helpful.