My son, Year 1 (5, almost 6) going to school with painted nails

[Potterson13]

Hi everyone.

I have a son who is in Year 1 at school. He’s a sensitive soul and not overly confident. I try my best to be his biggest fan/supporter and to teach him about equality and being kind.

I was painting my nails this evening and he expressed and interest. I was doing “christmassy” nails (red and sparkly) and he wanted me to paint his. Initially he just wanted his thumb doing light blue, to be like bluey! He then wanted the green glittery ones. I didn’t even think twice as personally I see not problem with it. It’s just paint! However when I’d done it and put him to bed I started worrying about his school friends and how it will be perceived by them.

Both myself and his dad have no issues, and don’t want to force him in one direction or another. We want him to be able to make his own decisions and be confident in them but my mummy instinct is kicking in and I’m worried. What if he gets negative comments from the other children? I don’t think I’m ready to face the prospect of him being hurt over something so innocent.

I don’t want to influence him or go down the “nail varnish is for girls” general stereotype or reinforce the “gender norms” in society as we’re already combatting the “but that’s a girl thing” or “that’s a boys job” but also want to protect him at all costs.

I know I’m probably just venting but I am curious to get opinions on this from other people in the same position or parents of children and how they would see this.

From a mummy who wants to bubble wrap their child!!

I don't think girls or boys (Y1) should wear nail polish to school.

I think you're right not to make a big deal of it. The only thing that occurs to me us that many schools have a 'no nail varnish' policy, so you might have to remove it if that's the case.
You could always repaint them for the holidays.

It’s against the uniform policy in most schools so this doesn’t have to be an issue. 🤷‍♂️ I won’t let young DC wear nail polish on fingers regardless of gender as it can be toxic and is likely to go in their mouths.

I think it's great... why stress over it he's just being creative with his appearance

At DD's school no kids are allowed to wear nail polish to school so that would be my only concern.

My DS is 5 and I paint his nails during school holidays if he wants me to. He's got an older sister (9) who likes her nails painted so I do him too if he asks. I think I first did it for him when he was about 2!

Neither of them are allowed it at school, however. I'm not sure if it's an official rule or not, but it's my rule. Holidays and long weekends only.

I wouldn't worry about what the children will think they are young enough not to really care. I would worry about the fact its probably against school policy. Take it off in the morning and redo them for over the Christmas hols.

Presumably he’s not allowed to wear nail varnish at school so this isn’t an issue you need to be concerned about.

No kids wear nail polish at any primary I know of. Wearing nail polish doesn’t change your sex. See Alice Cooper et al.

Is nail varnish even allowed at school?

But if he wants to wear it and it’s permitted, then, why not?

At home is fine but most schools don't allow nail polish for any of the children

yes nail varnish just isn’t for school full stop. But other than that let him have it if he wants just remove tomorrow morning

My 6yo ds likes to wear nail varnish sometimes. However, school don't allow nail varnish. For anyone!

I paint my year 1 boy‘s nails (with kid friendly nail polish) all the time and lots of his male friends have also had painted nails. Like pps he’s not allowed it at school.

Fwiw I’m delighted he hasn’t realised that it isn’t the norm for males to have painted nails - why shouldn’t he have some nice colours on his fingers.

No nail polish at school, it is usually against their uniform policy anyway. Loads of male celebs, past and present wear nail polish. So at any other time, yes to nail polish. If anyone says anything ask why it is for girls?

I was bullied a lot in school but also found that my unconventional style led to starting trends at school. I'd be made fun of for being the first person to do something then it would become a thing. Very annoying but it led to me having inner strength and never being afraid to be myself. It's okay to some have hills to climb even at an early age. It would be better if parents didn't raise bullies but I wouldn't discourage my child in any way to appease them either.

Thanks everyone. Naively I didn’t even think about the school not allowing nail polish!

I have googled the school policies and I can’t see any reference to nail polish. I’ll probably take it off in the morning though because I know how conscious he is and if the teacher says something it’ll upset him. He’s a worrier and likes to please so I think he’ll take a hit either way.

I guess it depends on your school, mine doesn’t ban nail varnish and I’ve definitely seen both boys and girls wearing it. That said I am in Brighton so things are less strict uniform and gender norm wise generally

I have a girl and a boy in late nursery and early primary.

Neither are allowed nail paint.

Just tell him that there’s no polish allowed in school. Easy!

Most nail varnishes contain formaldehyde aka embalming fluid why would you put that on a child?

I’ve got b/g twins in year 1. They have both worn nail Polish several times and no one has ever mentioned it, their school has no uniform though so it’s more relaxed.

Agree re uniform policy. Ours isn't on the school website either but it's one of the only uniform things where parents will get a call about.

I buy peace with the wild nail polish so this isn’t an issue. I’m careful with what I give to and put on my child and wouldn’t do anything to knowingly harm him, or myself for that matter. 🙄

Sorry this was supposed to be a reply to @StopGo not generalised to everyone!