19mo not talking. Tell me your late talker experiences please!

[Countheways]

Hi there,

I’m concerned about my 19 month old son’s speech development and would love to hear from others that have been through similar.

He can only say a handful of words and even then he will only use them very inconsistently. He seems to be doing ok in other all areas of development, he’s very independent and definitely understands what you say to him and can follow instructions, but I just can’t get him talking. He has a very chatty older sister who was an early talker, and everyone tells me he doesn’t talk because she does the talking for him!

I have a call booked with Speech and Language UK in the new year so I’m going through the correct channels, it would just be great to hear from other people whose children were the same and were just late developers as right now my mind is full of what ifs!

A hearing referral is my next port of call with the HV. He does seem like he’s ignoring me sometimes but he’s just so busy I just feel like he hasn’t got the time to seek my approval 🤣

My daughter communicated mainly with pointing until she was two. We had a hearing test booked for her but cancelled it because she suddenly began talking in complete sentences.
It was all in there, she just wasn't ready (and she had a big brother to do the talking)

My eldest didn't utter a word until 2.5 when he started talking in full sentences out of nowhere. It was bizarre. A few weeks after this everyone was commenting on what a brilliant talker he was. He's now 11 and has reverted to pre-teen grunting 80% of the time 🤣

My son started talking at 3 when I took him to nursery. Prior to this he was having speech therapy which didn't really help him. He's 14 now and since the age of 3 he does not stop talking x

My little one didn't say anything until he was two apart from the word "shoes".

Shortly after he turned two the words started coming thick and fast and now he will not be quiet. He's almost five and has an amazing vocabulary even if he does get muddled up with what the words mean sometimes.

I know it's scary, I was up to ninety about it but most likely, your wee one will be fine.

DS was sent for a hearing check at 2 due to delayed speech (said about 5 words I think!) But understanding was good, and physically dragged you around instead to tell you what he wanted.
By 2y5m he was doubling his words and at nearly 3 could say a 3-4 word sentence.

This is exactly what my son does; lots of shaking and nodding his head, pointing at what he wants, and bringing me things 🤣 I always know what he wants! Hopefully his talking will come on soon x

One was similar, didn't say anything but yes, no, momma and dadda at 2.

Then three weeks later full paragraphs came. It was like he was keeping it all in.

As long as the understanding is there, try not to worry, the words will come.

If he's a second child, sometimes the first speaks for them. They're often later talkers.

My 38 month old (3 yrs 2 months) barely says anything.. Mamma, Dada, incorrectly pronounces his Brother's name, Nanna, rrrr means granny/granddad, paa shh is pancakes, buh is butter, juh is jam, he basically says the first letter for every word... You get the picture. He understands everything we say to him though and does jigsaws meant for 4/5 year olds, so we aren't fretting. They say as long as they are aware, can understand, etc then the speech will come. Huh huh (ho ho) is Santa.

Maybe we should be more concerned, I really don't know?! First child was a late speaker too but was saying full words at this age. He's in the top group for reading at school and speaks very well using complex language and is definitely ahead of most of his peers, this is probably why I'm relaxed enough.

I hope the SALT will be able to reassure you.

Just to throw in that one of my DDs did not really speak much till over 2 years....... but once she started there was no stopping her!!

DS1 barely said a word until he was over 2yo.

By the time he was 3 he was chatting away like nobody's business. Had some issues with pronouncing a couple of sounds but got over them. Hasn't shut up since (is now 17!).

Remember at this stage, sounds (like moo, or uh-oh) count as "words" for the purpose of counting them as well. I'm sure that the 18 month milestone is just one word, not ten, and definitely not putting words together (my children did this at over two IIRC).

Using gestures to communicate like pointing and pulling you around is also really positive.

I would also look at gestalt language processing if a child isn't progressing in language as expected as this has only recently started to be talked about but is an alternative pathway that language can develop, and if your child is a GLP then "normal" tips to develop language might not be as helpful as gestalt-processor specific tips. (I'm not seeing signs of this in your post but it doesn't hurt to be aware.)

Thank you so much - this is really reassuring. He knows a couple of animals noises so that adds to his count 🤣 My major concern is how inconsistent he is with his words. I know that he knows the words but he’s just so headstrong that he’ll only use them when he wants to. It’s like he’s not bothered about proving himself or gaining anyone’s approval if that makes sense?

My son said his first ever word (baa baa to a picture of a sheep) at 23 months. He didn't say mum or dad to closer to 25 months.
He's now 4 and you can't shut him up!

Well of course That sounds exactly like a normal toddler! Why would he want to prove himself or gain approval?

I think he sounds like he's doing absolutely fine

My daughter was/is the exact opposite! Loves to gain praise by showing you how clever she is. It’s taking me a while to get used to him being the complete opposite 🤣

This has made me a little teary and I don’t know why! Time for bed maybe 🤣

I remember being worried about my first son at a similar age. I wrote down a list of words that he did say and the HV didn't seem overly bothered that he wasn't talking much. I found the list again a few years ago and laughed. He's 20 now and at Cambridge. Still a quiet lad. He's very much an observer and a deep thinker and I now know he was probably just the same as a baby. He was taking everything in. A few weeks after the time I was worried about the limited talking he just started saying quite complicated stuff. I'm convinced it's because he KNEW he couldn't do it properly yet so was waiting till he knew he could.

Boys do usually talk less and later, all dependent on their personality of course. Mine was like this and he's still not much of a talker now at 15yo. Speech is not a milestone. It can be factored in for a diagnosis sometimes but otherwise it's just not a development marker. It will come and go too. At first they learn speech patterns, then words and sounds, dropping some to focus on another. Sometimes speech goes out the window because they're focusing on climbing, or social stuff, or animal sounds. My 18mo was speaking in sentences a few months ago. Then she decided to only say "mama" and everyone was mama. She points to a baby and says "mama!" I swear just trying to get a reaction. That's her personality. Then everything was "poo poo". She thinks she's really funny! Now she's focusing on "s" sounds, I think she's just trying to understand plurality. If you do some research into speech development it can be fun to watch them move through the phases. It's different for every child but the pattern first, words second is always true. They start learning it in the womb actually. Speech issues are pretty easy to work with if needed, and can usually correct themselves when they start school. I have a DD with ASD and she spoke in utter nonsense until she started school and you'd never know now. She's 14 and has a huge vocabulary because she reads a lot. I'm glad I just let it play out, so she's never been aware or self conscious about it. I wouldn't worry! It doesn't sound like yours has any issues, it is very normal for words to come and go.

Ds1 is 7, almost 8.., didn't really speak until he was 3... now literally never stops talking.. even in his sleep..

My younger DS is 2 years and 3 months old. I am like a dog with a bone with his development as our older son is autistic and has severe learning disability and non-verbal at 10. So I am watching him like a hawk despite knowing rationally all children are different and, if our younger son did have developmental delays or disability then there is only so much I could do about it anyway.

Back to the point, because our older son has these disabilities we were flagged to have the two year check at just over two years with our younger DS. Often they are closer to 2.5 or even later. When the HV visited just after 2, he had maybe 20 words but I was more confident he was understanding and also trying to communicate in other ways. My older son did have odd words he then regressed and lost but he never had the understanding his younger brother did. He has also come on hugely in the last three months, he's still not using sentences or even many multiple word phrases but the vocabulary keeps coming and it's responsive. If your child is responding to communication and engaging with you then just keep doing what you're doing, and there has been great advice here, I'm sure it will come.

I forgot to say the first time our paediatrician said when we said we were concerned about my daughter's speech regression was "shall we arrange a hearing test". We had a hearing test when she was 7 months after her being delayed responding to sounds at 4-5 months. By the time the hearing test came around we had no concerns however