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Managing sons friends behaviour and its impact on my son

2 replies

skydiverjolo · 13/12/2023 10:15

My sons friend has difficulty controlling his feelings and appears to be insecure, so much so that he often thinks my son and his friends are laughing at him and lashes out. Several times he has hit my son (as well as his friends - scaring one boy) Recently he lashed out and grabbed my son and started shaking him. I told him off. After i told his mum that my son needed space from this boy. Initially she acknowledged that he is immature and thinks everyone laughs at him. My son has tried to limit contact with the boy but they are in a one form school (they are 9) this boy follows him around and won't leave him alone. Last week he leaned over the desk and said to him "you know what happened last time you laughed at me" now to me that's a threat. My husband spoke with the parents and they replied that they taught him to stick up for himself as my son is actually laughing at him (my son has a good relationship with his friends and their parents have said there are no issues so i don't believe this to be true) The lashing out has been going on for over a year on and off. This boy is the eldest of three boys and they all hit each other regularly, and other children, that behaviour is sometimes challenged in a half hearted way. My sons other friends feel the same as my son (they've both been on the receiving end) and try to distance themselves but as its a one form school its difficult, as yet, his friends parents are reluctant to say anything but acknowledge they don't want to be friends with the child. The other boys are arranging birthday parties and not inviting him, which upsets him. He cant see this is due to his behaviour, his parents are in denial. I was good friends with the mum but she says she won't be friends if they aren't. I'm worried that he will continue to behave that way, which will make my son and his friends stay away from him and the situation will get worse at school. My son is generally happy at school with his friends, they have more in common and are generally confident and don't have any issues. I have asked the school for a meeting. Thanks

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
barkingmel · 13/12/2023 10:19

You need to discuss this with the school and teachers. Your meeting should help a lot.

Tempnamechng · 13/12/2023 11:55

It's best to sort things like this out at school, so I'm glad you have a meeting with the teacher. Your son's friend's parents are hearing the story from their child's perspective, so of course they will defend him. They probably be told to keep away from each other.

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