Advice about 9 year old daughter please

[lou2023123]

Hi
I have a 9 year old daughter that i need advice/reassurance please. She’s my only daughter and looking for others for advice.

She seems to be worrying about friendships at school, the girls in her year are always arguing and having disputes. (Telling her to go away, you are a looser, we don’t like you)
She has one close friend but when the group plays together the badness happens. Something happens everyday and she comes home all quiet, fed up and deflated.

Out of school she has a few clubs/interests thats she loves and is very confident.
I have spoken with the head teacher who is “keeping an eye” but it’s still happening. He said she may have mild neurodivergence and could get tested but may not be worth it as it’s just a bit of paper.
Im worrying as all the negativity is having an impact on her and maybe thats why she is feeling down and is now finding it hard to “play” with the others? I don’t know which path to take? I don’t think she has what the head teacher says i think her confidence at school has been knocked. Thanks in advance

Get her tested. Things often fall apart for neurodivergent girls when they hit secondary age so getting a diagnosis and EHCP will help ensure her needs are met. It’s not just a piece of paper.

ND really starts to show in girls around that age. Has happened with both my kids, one diagnosed with autism.

It can take a really long time to get a diagnosis- I'd get the ball rolling ASAP so things can be in place at high school, if your dd wants or needs input.

We had to go private as our LA doesn't even cover dyspraxia and I suspected m6 son was dyspraxic like me (I was diagnosed as a mature student by my uni). Interestingly, one of my son's teachers was a school SENCO and she never suspected, because she never even heard of dyspraxia. Read up on various neuro diversities. If you go privately (a few hundred pounds) make sure the consultancy has someone on their books with expertise or at least an interest in that particular neuro diversity. My son and I had to do a barrage of tests over 3 hours. I understand tests are different for different conditions.