Baby not getting any easier.. what to do in evenings?!

[testy1997]

I've posted before about my fussy little girl. She's now 5 months and it's just constant grizzle grizzle grizzle. She's fine for about two minutes and then just fussing. She feeds well, sleeps well and is stimulated but I honestly just want to go back to work with how hard work she is. Is there anything I can do to help? Or just at least make evenings less chaotic? 5pm onwards is just a nightmare. She won't even go to anyone but her dad so any offers of help are quickly rescinded after about 5 mins

I remember my DD went through a grizzly stage around the same age, but it passes. They are growing and changing every day, as soon as you think you’ve got the routine nailed, they enter a new phase to keep us on our toes. It is tiring OP, but try to remind yourself you will never get the opportunity to spend this much time with your DD again.. work will always be there waiting for us. Enjoy the quality time whilst you can 💐

I don't understand what's wrong, is she crying in the evenings?

@RedRobyn2021 she wakes from her last nap just miserable and grizzles until bedtime. No one can hold her enough or entertain her enough so she just cries and fusses. I have a toddler and it is difficult with her as all she hears after nursery is crying..

do her naps need adjusting a bit? skip the last nap or something and put her down earlier? my SIL would put her kids to bed at 6pm when they were tiny as they'd just be grumpy all evening otherwise

Honestly, DH and I used to mime that bit from the Deerhunter where he puts the thing on his head to play Russian Roulette every evening. We called it being 'in country'. It was hellish. It passed.

My DD was like this. What have you tried? Bouncy chair and tv? Jumperoo? Extra long bath? Disco light?

It’ll pass. 4-6 months was hell with DC1 and is still pretty variable with DC2 who is 4.5 months. I’ve seen ‘angry potato’ used to describe babies who aren’t newborns but still can’t sit/crawl etc and I think it’d pretty accurate.

The witching ‘hour’ was 5-10pm for us. She just fed constantly whilst I watched TV. It changed a lot once she was properly in to finger food so hang in there!

We used to take it in turns to walk DC in pram or sling. Less claustrophobic than crying indoors, sometimes soothed them and at least the rest of the household got a break.

@Elttek I have considered an early bedtime but then am
Worried about an early wake! Not sure what is the lesser of two evils tbh!

What time and how long are naps?

@minipie 9-10 / 12.30-2 / 4-4.30. Bedtime is 7

I think grouchyitis is fairly common at this age. I know all 3 of mine had their worst moments in the early evening.

Hopefully it’ll pass soon.

Is she teething? Have you tried giving her some calpol to see if that helps? My DS teeths so bad but calpol usually helps.

She may be over sleeping tbh none of our 4 even our twins now 2 were good with naps and still aren't. Once I figured child 1 hated naps and this wasn't sleeping nights it then worked the same for child 2 and then our twins. None napped unless ill and they still sleep now what they did then 6pm for the twins - 7am and our sons n who is now 3 he did do 7:30pm- 6:15am from 3 months and almost still does the same other than wakes about 8am now

Would you give her a longer evening nap? Wake her at 5pm? Otherwise I'd say 6:30 bedtime.

Does she sleep all night from 7pm?

Do you wake her or does she wake naturally? My DS was horrendous if woken. Adjusted naps and earlier bedtime… he gets up between 6/7 and I’d say that’s normal for his age. He slept later at 5 months though. Is she sleeping through?

@Arthursmom I have to wake her from most naps! But I don't know how to adjust things as would like her to have same bedtime as my toddler!

@bowiesmum yes she sleeps through! But if I adjust the evening nap and let her go longer it will be a late bedtime I fear

@testy1997 in the kindest way possible, she’s angry because she isn’t getting enough sleep. She thinks she’s down for the night at 4 and then you’re waking her up 30 minutes later. I’d be angry too. The toddler and 5 month old are at very different stages and it’s unlikely they’ll have the same bedtime consistently for the next year or so at least. It’s amazing she is sleeping through! If you want to hold fast to the bedtime then I’d stop waking her from the first two naps which might naturally push back the afternoon nap and negate the need for the evening nap. Drop the evening nap unless you’re going to let her have the time she needs or at least 90 mins. Never wake a sleeping baby…

@Arthursmom do you think two naps at this age would be ok? She's only 5 months

Have you tried it?

I'm a sleep consultant and most babies on my plan will waKe a 5pm and go back down for 7

I personally wouldn’t wake her up from naps at that age - even if it means she has a later bedtime. You might get some better quality time with your toddler in the evening.

But mainly just sending you sympathies and hoping it gets better soon. I will have a new baby and a toddler soon and am very apprehensive.

I would let the middle nap be longer and try to power through without the afternoon nap (though she will probably fall asleep for a 10 min snooze if you go anywhere like school run) then early bedtime