3 year old won’t walk and is not listening to me.

[Paigeele]

We recently moved in with my parents and my siblings also live here. Since living here my 3 year old decides he doesn’t listen to my instructions anymore and ignores me completely and repeatedly asks anyone else in the room to which they give in to what he wants. How do I handle this situation? He just repeats and repeats to each person until he gets what he wants, for example he’s had 7 yogurts today he doesn’t even like yogurt that much it’s just because I said no and he wanted to see how many he could get through others I’m assuming. Also he is in preschool now and he makes me carry him to and from school, I’m 5 foot and slim build so it’s very difficult for me to be carrying him now and every other child in his school even the younger ones walk into and out of school but he throws the biggest tantrum if I tell him he’s too heavy and will have to walk. I’m really struggling how to handle this behavior. And also I’m not sure if I’m expecting more on this topic but he will throw his rubbish on the floor and when I ask him to put it in the bin he will refuse and honestly I have no idea how to tackle this? What does everyone do with a child who throws his rubbish and refuses to pick it up? What comes after that?

So you need to talk to the other adults in the house and get them to back you up. If your child asks anyone else for anything, the answer should always be "if Mummy says it's ok".

On the other behaviour, maybe the child is feeling a bit unsettled by the change in living situation and acting up/regressing a bit?

Hi, I have tried this but their response is “well it’s only a yogurt it’s not hurting him” and “he’s only a baby your expecting too much” Im not too strict but routine and things like once I’ve brushed his teeth( which is a huge fight) he only drinks water after that but my mum thinks there’s nothing wrong when he purposely asks her for chocolate milk, cup of tea etc knowing she will say yes and then I have to fight him to brush his teeth once again. Just little things like that. I’m just thinking I stick it out a couple of months and when we’re back in a house get strict back into it and he’ll only have me to listen to then? I feel pretty stuck atm.

If the other adults won't respect your parenting choices then you can't really do much until you can live somewhere else.

On the wanting to be carried thing, that can vary by child and there probably isn't a set age where they can definitely walk everywhere. I think my youngest still went in the push chair regularly aged 4 because he would refuse to walk and I'm 5ft and 7.5 stone so I couldn't carry him around for long.

Wrap him up warm after preschool. Tell him you’re not carrying him. Move him somewhere relatively safe and ideally where you can sit down for a while. Wait till he stops tantrumming and gets up and decides to walk. It might take a while. Only intervene if he starts running towards the road or something like that. At 3 if you’ve got a bit of walk to do to get to preschool I think it’s fine to use a pushchair, or those tricycles with handles for parents to push are great if you can get one. I’d drop hints to my parents about getting a 2nd hand one for xmas in your situation but I know that may or may not go down well depending on your relationship and family finances.

Take back control with the chocolate milk after teeth brushing. Take it off him and put it in the fridge for later. Appeal to authority can help. Say. Mum! The dentist/his dr told me it’s really important for them not to have more food/drink especially sugar after they’ve brushed their teeth. I don’t want him to get cavities and be in pain. Show your son the hey duggee tooth brushing song or similar so he understands too.