Birthdays - three year old and one year old

[WinkyWinkola]

My DS will be three in April and my DD will be one. DD's birthday is first - 25 days before DS's.

DS has been to several b'day parties, watched others open presents, has given presents etc and is clearly anticipating his birthday with great relish.

I would like DS and DD to open their presents together probably on DD's birthday and pretend it's both their special days.

I think it's going to be torture for DS to see his sister, of whom he was so very jealous until recently, open her presents and be made a fuss of. In future years, I would keep their birthdays separate.

Is it unwise as I could be setting a precedent? I just think DS is so young and has been through a lot this past twelve months.

don't see why not? They open their presents together at Christmas, so why not for their birthdays too. Their birthdays are so close, it makes sense to have a joint party. Do whatever works best for you.

I don't think you need worry about setting a precedent, he is still very young - I doubt he will remember this time next year, plus he will be that bit older so you will be able to explain to him that he will have to wait for his birthday to open his presents.

My DD is nearly three as well, and also gets very excited by birthdays and cakes and blowing out candles!

I dont think i would tbh, i think it would feel odd on your DSs actual birthday if you had already celebrated it earlier in the month.

I also have a 2 year age gap between my 2 DDs. I always buy abit of something for the my other DD. I dont spend alot, just a few cheap bits (pens, books, stickers ect).

tbh if at all, I would move her birthday for this year, not his.

Why not have a joint party somewhere in the middle, and have special days for just them at home on the actual birthdays? IYKWIM!

On reflection, I think if he's a) all into birthdays atm and b) has been jealous, I would avoid a joint celebration.

Stick to the proper birthdays - small celebration for her (she's only one, after all, and won't have the faintest) with big brother cake and big brother present ('from' her) for him; then lovely party for him on his birthday.

Ds1 will be 3 in May, and ds2 will be 1 in April (about 3wks between them)

We've decided to have a joint party, and picked a day that is between the 2 dates.

But on each actual birthday, we will be doing something special just for them.

I'd just not make a particular fuss about your DD's birthday -- she's one, after all, and won't know what it's all about. Then do a proper birthday for your DS for his birthday. I wouldn't be trying to make him share his "special day" with her if he already has jealousy issues and has had to share everything else.

Sorry, missed the bit about past jealousy.

In that case I would go woth beolinas idea and keep the birthdays seperate

I have the same ages with birthdays exactly a month apart. DS1 has been very jealous of DS2 though getting better. On DS2's birthday a couple of weeks ago DS1 opened all his brother's presents for him, made DS2 a card which he was really excited about giving to him and generally had lots of fun. He wasn't jealous at all, he obviously enjoyed it all much more than an obvilious one year old could do. We made a fuss of DS2's first birthday for DS1's benefit whereas DS1's own first birthday was more low key. I don't think you need to worry about it.

I have the same ages with birthdays exactly a month apart. DS1 has been very jealous of DS2 though getting better. On DS2's birthday a couple of weeks ago DS1 opened all his brother's presents for him, made DS2 a card which he was really excited about giving to him and generally had lots of fun. He wasn't jealous at all, he obviously enjoyed it all much more than an obvilious one year old could do. We made a fuss of DS2's first birthday for DS1's benefit whereas DS1's own first birthday was more low key. I don't think you need to worry about it.

I have 2 years and 5 days between my 2,in Septmeber and to make matters worse my birthday is 2 days before DS.
Thankfully DS the older had his birthday first, but he still used to get a bit overexcited on DD's birthday and want to open her presents. Up until they were 5 and 7 they had joint birthday parties usually the weekend in the middle.

Since then they have had parties sometimes in October or November, because being early September it is not always easy to organize. They love having their parties late as it is something extra to look forward to.

I have three years and two weeks between my two daughters birthdays. We do let them have seperate birthdays, because on your birthday it is 'your' special day and I think it devlaues it if you move them together.

We give our girls a joint birthday party on the weekend of one birthday and we have a holiday on the weekend of the other (usually centre parcs). The girls get their presents on their birthday - but whilst on holiday the 'birthday fairy' comes to visit and brings them little gifts (usually about 3 gifts of about a pound or two each - stuff I pick up in the sales, hair clips that kind of thing) and then on each birthday, the birthday girl gives a present or two to her sister.

Though, this year you can move one of the birthadys if you wanted to. I moved my daughter's 3rd birthday because her sister was actually due on her birthday, so I moved it forward a month, and she was none the wiser. But her 4th birthday was celebrated on her actual day - she knew when her birthday was then!
hth

And it would be shame for ds not to have a day to himself...
We had 'unbirthday' presents on siblings' birthdays when we little because my little sister could not cope with other people's birthdays!