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Original poster

Would you be angry at this?

39 replies

4658Lou · 03/12/2023 22:04

I just wanted a chat and vent without my emotion getting caught up and mr sayings things I say I’m upset and anger my husband never goes out for nights out but his Christmas work night out last time he went last year he got covid from the night out as several people had it too and I was very early pregnant and o then it was passed to me and I actually ended up in hospital dehydrated and poorly so yes I was annoyed that he had come back from a night out giving the whole house covid our daughter got it too we was all ill at same time.

fast forward we now haven 5 week old and he’s gone out on a Christmas works do and come back full of cold spluttering and sneezing all the time he had 2 nights away as I said have another night see if you become ill again and if ok come back he said he was fine but as soon as he’s come back within hours sneezing and not well has had to go lay down. I’m really angry that my 5 week old now is exposed to it when I have tried to maintain a bubble and keep him as much as I can away from illness he still not old enough to have his immunisations. I’m I being unreasonable to feel angry?

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Original poster
4658Lou · 03/12/2023 22:50

@pictoosh I was just trying to minimise risk. I can see your point, no it isn’t full blown effective but it was a preventative not just going to someone house when there ill or mixing with large crowds, one grandparent is in the high category of being vulnerable So since covid outbreaks my mum is very wary now because of being high risk and with being that time of year they have limited who they around like large crowds, since covid I too have been more wary never even thought like that prior to lockdowns but with having a newborn I guess it’s just made me wary

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savoycabbage · 03/12/2023 22:55

I really think that you have to stop thinking like this. It's doesn't sound healthy to me.

People have to be in the world, going to work, nursery, sports, school, hobbies etc. My dd2 was at playgroups and all sorts from the week she was born as I wanted to make sure that my dd1 kept doing the things she was doing before her sister was born.

Cantkidakidda · 03/12/2023 23:04

Congratulations on your baby OP.

Just checking, do you mean a bubble like the ones back in 2020? As in none of you are really going anywhere? I understand why that was the case at the time but I don't think it was really a healthy way for us all to be living longer term. Babies/children need to build their immune system and that happens by normal life, going for a walk, pop in the supermarket, out for coffee, meeting with friends and family etc.

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johnd2 · 03/12/2023 23:15

Just wait until you have a 3 year old in nursery picking up a constant stream of everything and bringing it home! It's not fun!
Our eldest was basically never ill because of COVID bubbles, this year on the other hand we have been a household germ fest.

Copperoliverbear · 03/12/2023 23:46

I would be really angry like you as you have a small baby, but my sensible head would say I'm being unreasonable, although I may not admit it to anyone. X

Original poster
4658Lou · 04/12/2023 01:56

@Cantkidakidda no I don’t mean a bubble we not going anywhere we are going out. We are going for walks and going out, what I meant was we just minimise seeing lots of people or crowds x

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Original poster
4658Lou · 04/12/2023 02:01

@Copperoliverbear yeah I think that’s what happened I’m annoyed it not wanting to voice it to anyone (except a chat on here) I’m so wary but I’m not keeping us in this bubble like we did in lockdowns I’m just minimising risk we are going out but i wouldn’t see a bunch a people are sick or place myself somewhere I know there is covid or if someone is not well because I do have a nearly 5 week old, all the advice form the midwives and health visitor is to keep away from sickness? So surely minimise risk is smaller amounts of people is better than large amounts so when I say bubble I just mean a small amount of people / no crowds

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Original poster
4658Lou · 04/12/2023 07:06

I spent on my own these last few nights with baby because he went away for 2 nights on works night out so lastnight I took care of baby through day and night I’m exhausted and still recovering from a C-section it still hurts if i move around too much and because I have been moving loads since day ten of my surgery I try my best but its uncomfortable but because hubby ill now he has to retreat away not hold the baby not help that’s were the annoyance has come from that too. I read everyone’s responses thankyou for your honest opinions x

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pitefhkl · 05/12/2023 20:16

OP just working out the maths. He went out a year ago for a Christmas do but your baby is only 5weeks?

YABU. You can't avoid standard coughs and colds at this time of year.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 05/12/2023 20:49

pitefhkl · 05/12/2023 20:16

OP just working out the maths. He went out a year ago for a Christmas do but your baby is only 5weeks?

YABU. You can't avoid standard coughs and colds at this time of year.

I thought this.

Original poster
4658Lou · 05/12/2023 23:01

@pitefhkl he went out on Christmas do last year sorry I didn’t explain this but it was later on afterwards in ‘feb’ they treated as a Christmas outing as various things at Christmas nobody could do it

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Theunamedcat · 05/12/2023 23:10

Prime rsv season what is he doing licking Windows? How is he getting so many bugs on a night out

My son caught "a cold" got bronchiolitis ended up in hospital at 9 weeks so I will admit I'm a bit more fussy than other people about babies and colds even now 10 years later he still wheezes when he gets a cold (a happy wheeze according to drs) he most likely always will

Original poster
4658Lou · 06/12/2023 02:37

@Theunamedcat I know that is terrible a family member baby had it similar age to your son and was hospitalised on oxygen etc. this is why I’m apprehensive I understand peoples opinions it is not rational to think you can’t be around anyone but I did limit the risk by only keeping some amounts of people like just grandparents etc not going around larger amount of people or crowds while it’s winter snd everyone is more prone to becoming ill and I don’t go around anyone who has got a cold etc. my husband yet again is not well from a works night out I think my point was I’m very annoyed over it (not his fault he got ill) but maybe I’m irrational thinking as I’m only 5 weeks postpartum I’m also recovering from a c section I’m not healed yet and yet I have had to see to the baby all day and through night even though my wound still hurts o need alittle help still but hubby can’t because last few days he either been on works night or been in bed ill- that’s we’re my annoyance has come from

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Original poster
4658Lou · 06/12/2023 02:43

I love being with the baby and I’m gladly doing everything while he isn’t good but when your physically recovering from an operation the additional help through night especially helps I’m not having that maybe that’s why I’m feeling like that abit too. But I’m taking care of husband it’s not like I’m that angry I’m seething anger, may be the wrong word it’s more upset fear annoyance. I’m glad i came chatting here got others opinions x

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