Grieving toddler?

[Dipsydoodlenoodle]

A bit of an odd one.

At home until 2 weeks ago, there was me, my DD and our dog. Very suddenly we had to get our dog put to sleep so it's just the 2 of us now. DD turned 2 years, 3 days after!

Since then she's been incredibly clingy - she's close to my parents (we live close by and they look after her when I'm at work). She's getting upset when they go home or they aren't here 24/7. Obviously I've not been the happiest so she may be feeding on that as well.

Could she be grieving in her own way? or is it likely to be another developmental leap of separation anxiety? or something else entirely?

Even babies much younger than yours pick up on stress. I wouldn't call it grieving the dog exactly but she'll be aware of your distress, and aware something has changed in the house.

I know it sounds daft, but it might help to explain to her about what has happened in simple terms - dog was old and died which means to go away, we're sad because we miss dog. Show pictures, use a toy dog to show going away etc. The sense of tension and anxiety if parents put on a brave face is often worse than explaining what is wrong.

It might also just be coinciding with a developmental phase where she would naturally be a bit unsettled and clingy.

My friend said her toddler definitely changed when their dog died. All ok now but went through an upsetting time with him for a few months after.

I would say at 2, she’ll be certainly missing your dog being in her life.

My DD is 7 & I’ve had my dog since before DD was born but she’d have been very upset at 2 even if he wasn’t there.

My DS definitely grieved for our cat who passed away when he was about the same age. It will be a big change for her to process and will take time, bless her. So sorry for your loss.

Thanks both for the quick replies. I know its not grieving as such...I just didn't know how to word what I was thinking.

I did explain to her what happened (I didn't think she'd understand, but I wanted to tell her) - unfortunately it happened at midnight otherwise I'd have taken her with me to the vets. She knows he's gone - She's seen stars and she says "NAME star" - I'm not sure where she got it from, but she keeps calling him a star. There are loads of photos around the house of him.

When I got his ashes back, I've put them in a cupboard behind glass...she didn't know 'he' was in there but a day later she pointed to the cupboard and said "NAME stuck" - she knows more than you think...and yes, as ridiculous as it is, I did open the door just in case he was stuck!

Thank you, I'm totally lost without him. I'm 'glad' others have experienced it and its not just me thinking it.

My daughter (25months) became super clingy at 2- it’s only just eased off and she will let her dad comfort her again.
no deaths or changes in our household- I put it down to developmental.

sorry for your loss the death of a pet is harder than people think.