Sick visitors and newborn

[Headaching]

I gave birth 2 days ago, and we got home yesterday evening. SIL video called and sounded really rough and said she has a sore throat so won't be coming anytime soon to visit. Later on in the evening she mentioned it's tonsillitis and she has antibiotics for it now

This morning SIL and MIL have decided that she will be fine by tomorrow and they are coming to see the baby because she's sure the symptoms are getting a little better. MIL lives with her, and they sleep in the same bed as SIL has works being done in her bedroom.

Husband sent a text message saying not to visit until next week now as we are not risking anything. I don't know if it's just me being precious or what, I am shocked they'd even think about visiting when SIL is sick. They now have the hump with us and aren't speaking to us anymore :/

I know colds etc are everywhere, we have a 3 year old who has the sniffles and it's unavoidable with school etc but to knowingly visit like that doesn't make any sense to me. Have you ever been in that situation?

Personally I wouldn’t visit someone’s house with a newborn if I knew I wasn’t very well- that being said I gave birth a week ago and we’ve had both the sickness bug and a cold in the house with Dc1 and DH. Luckily dc2 hasn’t picked anything up yet! I totally agree with you not allowing visitors if they’re not well though, as if you can avoid little one catching it then you’re obviously going to!

Oh absolutely yes babies get sick but given the choice most parents would prefer they got to the end of week 1 without a cold!
There's a difference as well between a person passing something on they don't know about and deliberately coming round having just been prescribed antibiotics!

My daughter was born during covid and I loved being able to be just a family of 3 through the first week of being at home. I think if I was to have a second I would have no visitors for the first day or so then very few visitors for the first week. Then start venturing back into the real world after day 7 as am very vulnerable to getting acutely unwell during the first few post partum days. Could you switch the focus and say you are pushing back any visits to the following week and ignore the illness

Say NO! I hate such inconsiderate people. It's up to you to speak up for your baby, too bad if they're offended.

You’re not being precious. How silly of them to get the hump about this, I would leave the ball in their court and let them contact you to rearrange. Don’t chase after them.

They’re being ridiculous. I’m glad your DH is on the same page as you though.

I’m usually v chill about this kind of stuff but that would be a big fat no from me.

If they turn up get your husband go send them on their way!

This ^

Hell no! RSV in particular is rife at the moment, childrens wards are full of very sick babies with it!

Your baby is so new, no vaccines and generally vunerable in terms of immunity. They need to stay away!

If you feel your resolve weakening, remember you'd rather they be in a mood than see your baby in hosptial with tubes and machines because they gave baby whatever they have.

I agree with you completely.

It's a hugely exciting time and it's lovely that they're so keen to meet the new addition to the family but baby will still be there in a week!

I get that germs are everywhere right now but it makes TOTAL sense that you want this minimised. You absolutely do not need to introduce unnecessary germs to a newborn baby. I think that's quite a disrespectful and selfish situation to put the family in. I wouldn't suggest visiting a newborn if I had tonsillitis. They're definitely not putting baby first.

Hope you're recovering well from the birth anyway OP, congratulations

I can't believe that they are selfish enough to ask to still come.

I had a baby last week and at least 3 people have txd me to say they would love to visit but have been unwell so will visit in a week or two when they are better. As it is my toddler is also currently poorly but really hoping DD2 will manage to avoid it.

SIL should stay away until at least the antibiotics are finished x

Omg no way would I allow visitors who were sick to see a newborn nor would I visit anyone if it was sick who had a newborn. Dc2 has RSV as a baby and was very ill at 5 weeks old. It's an awful illness and nobody should risk passing it to a baby.

They are being very selfish. I am thinking about you catching it, feeling unwell and impacting on these early days with baby.

Thank you for the replies. I was thinking the same thing, I wouldn't be able to visit someone with a newborn knowing i've got something! My brother is sick too and he has said he won't be visiting. Nothing to be offended about!