I am really torn what to do.
Ex and I broke up 1 year ago. He has moved in with someone he used to date. He has been horrible dad to our DCs. He doesn't turn up on time, if at all, with variety of excuses like I'm sick, I forgot, I have to work. On top of that the gf seems to have an issue each time he is due to see DC so he either cuts visits short or adds to list of excuses as to why he cannot come. No childcare over any time off including the whole of summer holiday but used up his holiday to spend time with gf. He has been drinking lots and supposedly taking drugs ( I say supposedly as I haven't caught him redhanded but symptoms are there). He has also proven that DC are nowhere on his priority list so I'm very fearful of what he is going to do with them when he isn't having DC at my house. We have agreed when we split up that we will only introduce serious partners to DC after minimum of 1 year of proper dating. Few months back he was pushing to take DC to her house but I have put my foot down as DC were struggling as it was. Now he wants to leave gf as he thinks he made a mistake, keeps saying he will move out as he is fed up on missing on the DCs lives. However despite several chats over the last few weeks, nothing has changed. He has not moved out, he is not doing better or more for DC.
I am so sick of him affecting DC lives and let's be honest, affecting mine too as I never know whether he is coming and what time so I cannot move on as always have to be on hand. I have tried talking to him many times but don't get honesty but do get many empty promises of how he will do better and of course nothing changes. I have had enough and thinking of going mediation and then court for child arrangement orders but fearful as it will ruin our relationship. Despite him being a shit dad etc, we are able to be in the same room and wondering if that's better for DC than going via court? Can anyone advise? Thanks