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Parenting

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Original poster

Am I normal to find this stage hard?

13 replies

mmmmummmyyy · 09/11/2023 20:03

DS is 2 in the next few weeks. He says some words not much (I’ve already spoke to HV who said he’s not behind, he’s just the lower end of the scale for normal for his age) so I can imagine his frustration and tantrums stem a lot from , he can’t always communicate what he wants

Hes currently in nursery 4 days a week whichll be 3 soon as I can finally drop a day at work, so sometimes evenings he just seems overstimulated after 8-4 at nursery playing and learning all day

I get allllll of the tantrums. My mum has him 1 day a week, and she’d be honest with me, she constantly says how he doesn’t even whinge for her at all. When I leave him with DH now and then, same thing, not even a whinge. And nursery say he’s fantastic he’s a live wire but he does not kick off for them really.

And I know the safe space thing. I’m the parent he spends most of his time with so it’s natural he’s comfy expressing his emotions to me and taking frustrations out on me.

I just feel a bit of a failure :( some days it’s like walking on egg shells if I don’t do something fast enough he kicks off on me. Some days it’s not like this

hes my best friend and we have such a special bond and I adore him. Will the tantrums get a bit less as he communicates more????

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Thenewnewme · 09/11/2023 20:06

How many words does he have? Does he put words together, for example ‘more biscuit’.

There is the 2 year check
https://portsmouth.tricare.mil/Portals/130/24%20month%20asq.pdf

I could consider doing some signing with him.

https://portsmouth.tricare.mil/Portals/130/24%20month%20asq.pdf

Isthisexpected · 09/11/2023 20:11

If I've understood this right you only spend two days with him so I wonder if it might help to have more time to connect without the stimulation of going places and doing things. Perhaps one of those days if you don't already you just spend at home doing toddler led play?

Isthisexpected · 09/11/2023 20:11

So sorry I didn't actually answer the question. It's normal to find any stage hard because it's all in context!

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2 year olds Families General parenting

Original poster

mmmmummmyyy · 09/11/2023 20:12

hi we go out every weekend somewhere even if it’s soft play or the park , low key , we make sure we do something each day :) as well as home play

OP posts:

Original poster

mmmmummmyyy · 09/11/2023 20:14

Apologies I read that as why don’t you go out aha! He doesn’t really tantrum while we’re out

He is quite active so we like to get him outdoors :) we usually do this am before mid day nap or pm after mid day nap , the other half of the day is home play

OP posts:

HappierTimesAhead · 09/11/2023 20:14

I could have written this! My son was a bit delayed with his speaking and it was so hard. It felt like he took everything out on me! His language developed at 3.5 and things got much better. Keep the faith, it will improve but it is so tough!

LovesFood1987 · 09/11/2023 20:15

It is a hard age and you're doing amazingly well.

I don't understand anyone who says kids don't get easier... They Def do! My 5yo is a breeze compared to when he was 2!

HappierTimesAhead · 09/11/2023 20:17

LovesFood1987 · 09/11/2023 20:15

It is a hard age and you're doing amazingly well.

I don't understand anyone who says kids don't get easier... They Def do! My 5yo is a breeze compared to when he was 2!

I would echo this!

sillyme563 · 09/11/2023 20:25

I could have written this thread. My toddler gives me all the tantrums and nursery, family, etc all get these sweet toothy grins all day long. It's infuriating.

ColleenDonaghy · 09/11/2023 20:29

Agree it's normal and also difficult.

My eldest is 5, always been an angel at nursery/preschool/school. It all comes out at home, big emotional meltdowns. We've learned to just let them happen, she's tired and doesn't have a handle on it yet.

3yo is more confident and, well, brings her whole self to nursery, shall we say Nicer to deal with the moments behind closed doors than have to have The Chat every day at pick up!

PurpleBugz · 09/11/2023 21:26

You say yourself he seems overstimulated so I'd reduce the weekend outings tbh. He's getting that from nursery you can have lazy days and it won't be bad for him.

Many start signing with him it can't hurt.

But also it's normal don't stress out over it.

Equally it may be meltdowns not tantrums. My 7 yo is autistic and the meltdowns never stopped. I knew he was autistic from very young but HV fobbed me off. I've seen many other parents experiencing similar. Don't want to insult HV but I don't trust them to pick up on autism based on my experience of them

MsChatterbox · 09/11/2023 21:49

My son was really difficult at 2. I was constantly feeling like a failure. He's now a joy (most of the time) at 6. My daughter is 3 and not hit a hard stage. I think the ones that say 2 is easy had children like my daughter!

gentlemum · 09/11/2023 21:58

It doesn't sound the tantrums are related to not being able to communicate as it's not in other situations (at nursery, with your mum) where his communication skills are presumably the same. My 19 month old is similar that he's quite calm and easily pleased when he is with my mum and I'm at work and when I go to pick him up he goes nuts, very manic and lots of tantrums! My mum always comments 'he's not like this with me' 😂 it's so normal, he will grow out of the tantrums.

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