Toddler wanting more food

[reabies]

My DS is 18m, and generally eats well. I feel like he mostly gets a balanced diet of about the right amount of food.

Recently he's been screaming for more food in the morning and evening, on nursery days. His food intake looks like this on nursery days:

7.15am - cup of milk and a bit of his dad's toast
8.30am - breakfast (at nursery) usually weetabix
10am - snack (usually fruit)
11.30am - lunch
2pm - snack (usually savoury, crackers/breadsticks etc)
4.30pm - dinner
6.15pm - cup of milk or snack at home. E.g. Toast and philly, fruit, baby crisps/biscuits, boiled egg

Last night I made him some toast when we got home, and he literally screamed MORE even though he'd had his dinner at nursery. I was stuck because I didn't want to say no for the sake of it, if he was hungry there's no reason not to give him more food. But, I also am really worried about over-feeding him, especially when I've not had oversight of what he's eaten all day, except whether he had 'none, some or all' which is the info we get from nursery.

At 18m is he still responsive enough to his body that if he's asking for more he genuinely wants more and is hungry? Or is he now at the age where because he knows he can ask for more I need to be more aware of how much he is eating?

On days when he's with us I worry about this less because I know what he's eaten all day and whether another piece of toast or a yoghurt before bed is reasonable. Just to add we always brush teeth between any snacks and bedtime.

My son had 'tea' at nursery then came home and had another meal from 9 months. He to this day has never missed a meal.

He is 6ft with a six pack now at 17

I think as long as its healthy crack on if he's hungry they are growing unlike us!

I'd give him more. Maybe nursery portions are smaller than home or maybe he's having a growth spurt (in which case sometimes it feels impossible to fill them up)!

My 2.5 yo had 3 bowls of Shreddies when she got home from nursery last night. She's tall with a good appetite. I don't think nursery portions are very large, plus she doesn't sit still. I take the view if she's hungry she eats. Her body knows what it needs.

My toddler has a full dinner after he gets home from nursery and sometimes eats more than my partner. He's not fat and he stops eating when he's full. Nursery dinner is really early and often quite small.

If he’s screaming for more food it sounds like he needs it. Toddlers can eat enormous amounts when they’re growing. I’d give him the food and not worry about it.

My toddler eats like Henry VIII and is still on the bottom of the weight chart.

Oh gosh so much feedback already and so many kids eating after nursery! That makes me feel much better! I have just emailed them to get a picture of a lunch/dinner portion so I have more awareness, but glad to hear if he's asking for more it's pretty normal and he's fine to have more.

Going to have to get some more food in 😅 I have definitely been relying on the food provided at nursery to cover his needs! Thanks everyone

Kids that little still self regulate. Toast, cereal, fruit and breadsticks plus two proper meals – one of which will be more if a nursery light tea – doesn’t sound like enough. Could you try porridge or something substantial for breakfast on nursery days and something substantial for his after-nursery snack: Greek yoghurt, beans on toast, etc.

I find with my dcs they always eat more during a growth spurt, it varies. I would listen to your son and give him more, it sounds like you're feeding him lots of healthy food too! My youngest has dinner then supper usually bananas/toast! He is a healthy weight, very tall and strong, rarely gets sick! Honestly a good eater is so much easier than a poor one, you're lucky!

Oh and I second some more filling foods eg bananas, porridge, cheese, greek yoghurt with honey etc

Give him protein instead of empty carbs or at the very least with them.

It sounds like an awfully big gap between his proper breakfast (although just Weetabix doesn't sound much) and his dinner the night before. He is probably starting the day in deficit and never catching up!

I'd be giving a proper meal when he gets in at night - at least beans on toast and fruit, if not more.

Probably bulk up in the morning too - porridge, or something eggy or cheese on toast etc.

IME kids that age are very good at stopping when they're full. I'd just keep offering healthy food. He might be coming up to a growth spurt, they can eat truly ridiculous portions then!

Our nursery do two hot meals at noon and 4pm, then we have dinner as a family at 6:30 or so - sometimes the kids barely touch theirs, others they're asking for seconds.

I also agree with schools giving tiny portions, they also don't get long to eat either.

Ideas ..
Feed you son extra vegetables at the end of the day at 6:15 pm with the egg - cooked with your own dinner.
Breakfast could be porridge with Dad which might start the day with a more substanial meal.
When your son calls for more listen to him and include more whole foods in snacks and pay attention to what he eats for lunch. Is it a nutrient rich meal and does he finish it?
Sometimes kids are distracted and eat less than you think.

Thanks everyone, I would say up until now he's been satisfied with nursery meals and the snack at home has been enough of a top up - the screaming started this week so potentially a growth spurt. But please don't think he's been going hungry or eating 'empty carbs' his whole life.

Appreciate suggestions for extra snacks - as mentioned I'd been relying on nursery and so didn't necessarily have go-to stuff around on the days he's there. DH and I do Gousto so our food is pretty much portioned out in the fridge and we don't have loads of extra stuff in - like baked beans for example, but we do always have bread, milk, cheese, eggs.

Anyway, now's the time to get organised and have more on hand for him of an evening, so will be getting some ideas and heading to shops today. Thanks again for all the advice!

From what you have in already, cheesey scrambled eggs is a good one, i used to sneak in finely chopped spinach and tomatoes.
Beans, porridge and bananas are easy to keep in aswell.

And some yoghurt, you can get those smaller pots of greek yoghurt as well which once opened keeps 3 days (sometimes longer).

My DS has a big bowl of porridge in the morning at home followed by breakfast at nursery.

Eats all his lunch, tea and snacks throughout the day. Usually has seconds.

Always has another light meal when he gets home, a sandwich, cereal, porridge, nut butter on toast.

He's 3 and a skinny little thing.

I would say give him more.

Mine always had porridge before bed while at nursery :)

Sounds like a growth spurt alright. I'm guessing that next week he'll look chunky and the waistbands on some clothes will be tight, then a couple of weeks later you'll notice the waistbands are fine but you can see his ankles! Mine were chunky babies but slimmed out as they grew up - during the growth spurt prep they'd basically be spherical potatoes.

One-off mine never ate much at nursery lunchtime - he was always distracted and chattering and a slow eater anyway. I think they had their set time for lunch, and cleared away even if some hadn't fully finished (because of dawdling...). We always just had our dinner together at around 6 and kids had some of that - tea at nursery was usually around 4pm so had a little break in between food. If DH was working and back later he just warmed his up.

You’re giving him loads of snacks and not enough actual food

Definitely needs more OP.

When my son was that age he'd have a proper breakfast at home, such as eggs and beans on toast or porridge, then breakfast at nursery, lunch and tea, then eat a cooked meal with us when he got home. Usually has some fruit and yogurt or some toast before bed too.

He is 5 now, still eats like he is hollow and is very tall and skinny. He honesty eats more than I do and and I love taking him to to beefeater for a breakfast where kids eat free. Definitely get my monies worth!

as long as the food is filing and nutritious, keep giving him it.

It might be hard for op to give another breakfast before nursery drop off. We drop off at eight after a forty minute commute, and our morning world be really hard with breakfast too. He does always have 150ml oatmilk before going out though

Otherwise we're similar to op except take an organix bar to pickup and he eats it on way home (supervised of course.)

We also give him dinner with us at six thirty ish. We do HelloFresh as I found it easier and more baby friendly - I just leave out or reduce the super salty things like stick and soy sauce . Last night he had a huge portion of peanut stir-fry.

He also has oatmilk again after his bath and story.

This is quite unfair based on the information provided above. You have no idea what the content of his meals are, and snacks can also be 'proper food' he's hardly necking lollies and crisps. A boiled egg is a good source of protein. Fruit may be sugary but also full of vitamins and fibre.

Thank you to those who weighed in helpfully sharing their own anecdotes of their kids eating more or made useful suggestions. Until you speak to people and share experiences it's not always easy to go on instinct alone. My own family has some unhealthy relationships with food that I am striving to avoid replicating and sometimes leave me second guessing.