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Original poster

expecting dc2 - should I increase dd's nursery sessions?

15 replies

Maenad · 10/03/2008 20:40

I am expecting dc2 to arrive in October, a couple of months before dd's 4th birthday. She is currently doing 3 mornings a week at nursery and having a good time. The nursery say I need to decide now if I want to increase her sessions in September.

I'm a bit torn and don't know what would be best - on the one hand I don't want to schedule her life away unnecessarily before school takes her away from me. On the other hand I am having trouble imagining life with her and a baby to look after, and wonder if I will want her to be at nursery a bit more when the baby arrives?

Do you think 3 mornings of private baby-time will be enough? Can anyone with two (and maybe a similar age-gap) help me imagine what might work for us?

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Orinoco · 10/03/2008 20:44

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Original poster

Maenad · 10/03/2008 20:53

The funding doesn't cover the fees (very expensive!), but tbh I'm not so worried about that. I don't think dd would deal brilliantly with being sent on unpredictable days depending on my needs - she's a creature of habit and likes to know where she'll be when, and I imagine that the instability of having a new baby around would only make that more important for her.

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Orinoco · 10/03/2008 21:01

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Maenad · 10/03/2008 21:11

You don't think I'll be too knackered? I know I'm being a bit of a wimp, by the way, but I think it's important to recognise my wimpy tendencies well in advance and plan for them!

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Orinoco · 10/03/2008 21:21

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Maenad · 10/03/2008 21:34

She's the most maternal child I've ever met, so I am hopeful that she will be positive about the baby. But obviously I'm not expecting it to be that simple!

thank you for being so encouraging about the transition from 2 to 1. I'm quite worried about it and concerned in case I don't have enough positive energy for dd and just end up shouting at her a lot. Really want to avoid that.

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LyraSilvertongue · 10/03/2008 21:37

How long are the mornings she goes to nursery? Is she at a school nursery or private?
DS2 is at nursery 2.5 hours a day and he loves it. It shouldn't be too much for your 4-year-old DD unless it's a very long morning.
You'll be grateful for the time you can spend one-on-one with DC2.

canofworms · 10/03/2008 21:39

I had dd3 2 months after dd2's 4th birthday and she was at nursery 5 afternoons a week. Being a nursery attached to a school we couldn't have gone for anything less.

I think it worked great in terms of having time to tidy up (or even rest!). It made settling into a routine easy as we were doing the same things every day. And there's still the rest of the day for you to spend together!

LyraSilvertongue · 10/03/2008 21:39

DS1 went to nursery two afternoons (2-6) a week when DS2 arrived. I couldn't have managed without that time as DS1 was only 2.

Orinoco · 10/03/2008 21:42

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Maenad · 10/03/2008 21:45

It's a private nursery, and she's currently doing 3 hours a day. I don't think she'd find it particularly hard to spend more time there - she does enjoy herself and isn't desperate to leave at the end of the session.

On the other hand she's not yet really very well developed in terms of socialising with other children - she still plays on her own most of the time. So I'm not convinced that the extra sessions would benefit her particularly - it would really be for my convenience I think, so I'm trying to figure out how much I'll need that extra time.

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Maenad · 10/03/2008 21:48

Orinoco, thank you. I have a big smile on my face now.

I think my instinct is telling me to stick at 3 sessions really, it's just that I'm scared.

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Orinoco · 10/03/2008 21:58

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LyraSilvertongue · 10/03/2008 22:09

I was in denial until DS2 was actually born and then it was very hard but DS1 was just under 2 when DS2 arrived. it should be a lot easier having a newborn and a 4-year-old.

tummytickler · 10/03/2008 22:28

Hi - apologies as i have not read the rest of the replies yet.
I was in a similar situation last year , although i had a smaller gap.
I opted to only up the sessions by one session but ombined them and dd goes to nursery for 2 full days (9-4) instead of 4 morning sessions.
I found this was more restful for me and the baby as we had larger chunks of time to ourselves and dd enjoyed it more aswell as i was never picking her up before the rest of her friends went to do an activity (such as a picnic, or game). It also leaves us 3 full days a eek that we can use properly as they are not broken up by toing and froing from nursery.
This worked really well for us - but dd doesnt start school until next year.
Goingg from one to two was hard and i was tired but it wasnt as bad as i was led to believe so try not to worry - you can always cut her nursery sessions later if you feel it is too much!

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