Best means of second language acquisition for older children

[Binteee]

My DC are 9 and 7. I am a native English speaker. DH is as well, but his parents are native speakers of another language. Unfortunately, they mostly spoke English to DH so, while he can understand pretty well, he can’t speak the language, so hasn’t spoken their language with our children. We asked the grandparents to speak their language to our DC, but they never followed through.

I am pretty strong (though not native) in a second language that I have exposed my children to a bit, but have never really focused on teaching it to them.

We were with some friends today whose DC are the same ages as ours and they are fluent in the father’s language in addition to English. My DC were lamenting the fact they are not bilingual and I feel the same way!

Is there any realistic way to start getting our DC to a high level of a second language at these ages without DH or I being fluent in one ourselves? Would this entail language classes and camps? Are there any other options?

I speak French to the kids, DH speaks Swedish to them. I speak English to DH.
It takes effort to stick with one language. You might start a conversation with the children in said language, but after a few minutes, it will naturally move to the main language of the house.

Ask the children if they really mean what they say about wanting to learn a language. It is not easy, are they game? You will need classes or weekend clubs, it is exposure and communication. Start with Duolingo first, to see engagement without spending anything , Then make it a game. With post-it , label the whole house, from the milk in the fridge, to the charger. Make it fun. Pretend you don't understand English, or speak with a silly accent.

On Netflix, select that language.

It takes time, as in 500 hours, time. But give it a go!

Thanks for your reply. Both my DC were very into Duolingo for a while of their own accord, but of course one chose French and the other Spanish. I think they’d both truly like to know another language, but I don’t know how hard they’d be willing to work. Most of their school friends are at least bilingual and they think it’s very cool.

Unfortunately my second language is Arabic, which causes a number of challenges. I’d have to teach them a separate alphabet first, there is the question of which dialect to teach (I’ve lived in multiple middle eastern countries so know a few reasonably well and they are very very different), plus it’s rare we’d be able to practice on holiday.

DH’s language is also a different alphabet and a low density language so definitely not much possibility of exposure except with grandparents, who seem unwilling to cooperate for whatever reason.

Perhaps we could do Spanish — no separate alphabet and my husband and I both studied it a bit so we can get by. But we definitely couldn’t hold full conversations in it.

I’ve also seen some local French lessons for kids, but I’d be no help with that.

Parent of bilingual DC who has done a lot of reading as the English speaking parent. I desperately wanted my DC to have their DF’s language and we have tried to follow the research.

If you wanted natural acquisition of language, you’ve missed the boat really and it started with DH’s parents not sharing their language with him. That is a real, real shame given the fact that you are clearly a multilingual and multicultural household.

As a teacher- your best way of your DC achieving some fluency would be to pick a language and they will just have to learn in the traditional way. Duolingo as regular practice and a tutor to work through some workbooks with them. Move into independent GCSES and other qualifications as they progress.

Unfortunately you and DH wouldn’t be able to ‘support’. You don’t speak another language fluently. Obviously a bit of the basics will help as you might be able to see what they are doing with the tutor- but parents who don’t speak the language fluently ‘getting by’ and trying to help the DC results in errors.

If they did Spanish or French or whatever- or even picked up Arabic or DH’s language- it would have to be something that you facilitate through tuition, holidays, exchanges, cinema, experiences…. rather than something you help them in. It would be like how other kids learn instruments to a high level.

it can done, of course it can. But you need outside help.

Language teacher here The only sure fire,way to do this is to live in a place where another language is widely used and where bilingualism is encouraged or is indeed the 1st language,We,lived in Holland where English and Dutch
predominate I spoke
those with My dad (a Dutchman) and Swedish and English with my mum(a,Swede)
Although Dad spoke some Swedish I only spoke,Swedish with Mum Children fixate on the sounds coming from the same source and will become confused if you keep switching languages (until of course they grow up) Grandparents should o ly speak their language with them and nothing else
.

@Razorcroft I 100% agree that it’s too bad about DH’s parents. DH’s mother wasn’t confident in English so basically practiced on DH and thought that would be better for him, although the research obviously doesn’t support this method! Due to this, despite DH being a native English speaker, he still has some very odd/incorrect turns of phrase that he learned from his mother that I have to correct for him since he works in a very formal, professional job. Obviously since the grandparents didn’t even speak in their language to DH it’s no surprise they didn’t with our DC despite us begging them. They also blame DH for not knowing their language — so they’re pretty nonsensical in general.

I also actually studied second language acquisition in university so I know about the various theories about natural language acquisition and know we’ve pretty much missed the boat on that! I wish we could’ve afforded a bilingual nanny, had a local bilingual nursery, etc. but alas those were not options for us.

@Muddle2000 Unfortunately I don’t think moving abroad to learn another language is in the cards for us. And grandparents refused to speak their language to our DC so that ship has sailed!

Send one child to the parents-in-law, over the Summer break.
Next year, send the other child.

Do not send both kids are the same time, they will speak English to each other and ignore the elders.