How to co-sleep with toddler?

[wishIwasonholiday10]

My 15 month old is poorly and waking every hour or so during the night and will only go back to sleep on one of our chests. I often see the suggestion of co-sleeping in here and was wondering whether to try it but am not sure about safety. Mostly worried that she will roll off onto the hard wood floor and possibly knock her head on the bedside table or cot which are close to the bed. How do you stop this? She is not breastfed so might not stay close to me. Also wasn’t sure whether I need to reduce the duvets as I like sleeping with the duvet pulled around my shoulders. Would I put her under my duvet or try to wrap it around me and have her separate in her sleeping bag? These probably sound like dumb questions to people that regularly co-sleep!

just to add I know about the safe sleep guidance for babies but was more wanting to know what people do with a youngish toddler, especially one that’s a bit mobile but not able to get in and out of bed safely yet.

If you are able to, you can push your bed as close to the wall as possible and pop her on the wall side, keep the duvet off her and pillow away so she won't get tangled in the night, but that's easy to do if she's next to the wall!

I still sleep with duvet round my shoulders as I send all the rest over to my partner so it doesn't move at night.

If you cant move the bed then I would put her in the middle and just wear a long sleeve warm top to sleep in and duvet over your legs. You can sleep in a cuddle curl around her

Hope this helps x

Keep her separate in her bag with no pillows or duvet around her.

Your options for the falling out thing:

• have you on one side, a bed guard on the other
• have one parent on either side (eg top and tail)

Your options for the blanket thing:

• use a single duvet for you, a toddler blanket or sleeping bag for dc
• if two parents, a single duvet each and then toddler in the middle with their own blanket or sleeping bag
• if it's just you (one parent), share a large but thin duvet that they can easily kick off if needed, and everyone wears warm pyjamas

Or push the bed against the wall with you on the other side, as pp said

Just get a bed guard and have her on one side. Co-sleeping is incredibly safe by 15 months. She'd be fine between you as well by that age. (Not as a tiny baby.)

Oh and I cosleep with a 3 month old so it's different I suppose but I keep my duvet pretty low down in the bed and wear a hoodie. My baby has a separate cellular blanket and wears several layers so she's not too cold.

15 months is too young for a bed guard. There is a real risk of entrapment.

15 months is quite old - most 15mo are walking (in some form) and nearly all are crawling. Unless specisl needs, they can communicate even if just yelling a couple of words.

A pretty vanishing risk of entrapment if the parent is right there - the child would either extricate themselves with ease, or shout "help me mum!"

Edit - this is in reply to the post above. Maybe they meant 5mo not 15mo.

Thanks all for the helpful advice!

If it makes any difference my DD is not crawling or walking. She bum shuffles around the place during the day but can’t get into a sitting position herself so tends to roll around in her cot. She seems to seek out the edge of the cot so I’m a bit concerned she might do the same in bed. We can’t easily push the bed against the wall at the moment.

No, I did not mean 5 months. 15 months is too young for a bed guard.

18 months is the minimum recommended age, but it is better to be over 2.

Most 15 months would not be able to say “help me mum”

Wouldn't they? Mine was very average for her nursery class and could certainly say, if not exactly those three words in order, then some kind of yell to signify pain or distress. Help or ouch or just "aaagh mummy".

Your rule about bed guards seems to be a generic one for an unattended child. You forget we are talking about co sleeping here. The mum (or other parent etc) is literally inches away. Unless she is totally drunk or deaf she'd hear if her kid had got trapped, no matter which words or lack thereof he uses.

What kind of bed guard are you thinking about? The rail ones might not be ok for this age but you can get mesh ones which are fine.

Pillows are fine too, NHS says ok for pillow and duvet at one year old. But I'd be wary of a heavy/high tog duvet.

We bought this bed frame and a low mattress. It was the lowest we could find while being robust and affordable. I couldn't relax cosleeping in our high bedframe. ZINUS Trisha 18 cm Metal Platform Bed Frame | Mattress Foundation | Wood Slat Support | Double | Black https://amzn.eu/d/drZuxHm