Unfriendly parents at kids party

[Boredinthehuse]

DS has just started reception and been invited to a few parties already. We went to the first one today and DS enjoyed himself and had a great time but I've left feeling quite sad and anxious. The other parents just don't seem very friendly, I tried to make small talk with a few but the conversation was just one sided. The other parents seemed chatty with each other, some have older ones in the school so may know each from previous things. I just ended up sitting a few seats away from the main group and watched the party while the parents chatted. It's really put me off taking DS to other parties. Is this normal or have I just gotten with a rude bunch? Just feel very anxious this evening and going over what I said and did to work out why no one was particularly friendly, anyone else experience this?

I feel for you. I am dreading my daughter's birthday party, and those she will be invited to.. for this exact reason. I have already been able to gage this sort of behaviour in the playground. It seems quite common in my experience. But doesn't make it any easier.
Hugs 🩷

They do sound quite rude. What were they chatting about? Couldn't you have joined in? If you physically distance yourself, you'll never get to know them.

Thanks I just understand the need to be unfriendly, we're all there for our kids to enjoy a party and they are in the same class! I'm just used to bringing DS to birthday parties of my lovely friends kids and it's just a nice experience for everyone. I think DH will probably come next time so at least we can chat to each other!

Don't understand*

After trying with a few of the parents who clearly didn't want to chat it was difficult. I was sitting down on the chairs first then overtime a few sat down together a few seats away from me and chatted. Would have feel strange to move and sit beside them after previous awkward encounters.

Don't take it personally. It happens... but it doesn't mean it will always happen either.

Some people will just see it as a time to chill on their own for a bit while the kids are entertained.

Your expectations may be off though since you're used to going to parties where you know people.

Don’t let overgrown mean girls get you down. Let your child have fun and then give them a smile and leave, you have better things to do :)

Go with your DH.

Eventually your child will develop friendships which may lead to play dates and you’ll get to know some parents. They then will be your chat buddies at parties.

Drop and go!

Don't be put off, next one you go to look around to see if there are any other parents sitting alone or looking uncomfortable and approach them. Alternatively take a book and sit and read for a couple of hours.

It's only for a year or 2 and a handful of parties a year, then you'll be able to drop and run. That started in yr 1 round my way but according to MN it's more normal in Yr2. As the parent hosting full class parties for my DD I loved it when parents would drop and run. Would much rather just deal with 20 odd kids than 20 odd kids and their parents.

I'd still go. One, you will get use to them quicker if you see them more and two, it may be different parents and some may be friendly.

It’s for your child to have fun, not you. Yes, it would be nice to meet interesting new people, but it’s not a given. Might be a more receptive crowd next time.

I find these sort of things difficult socially too - I've been to three parties with DD so far and only really started talking to any of the other parents at the most recent, and even then the conversation was very superficial - but surely you're going for your DS's sake, not yours? I go mostly expecting to just sit around, nibble some beige food and take DD to the loo when required! If he enjoyed it then it was a successful trip, no?

I make sure I always take a book with me as I find I can avoid awkwardness by looking engrossed in a book.