Chores for kids

[thebadmanuk]

Hi, I am a man on mumsnet - sorry...
I just wondered what anyone would consider reasonable chores for kids to do in the home day to day.

I am a step dad and my step kids (12 and 16) have been asked to give the cats a scoop of dry cat food once each a day, one of them provide fresh water, the other change the cat litter - then between them they load/unload the dishwasher.

Is this unreasonable? To me it takes 10 minutes max per day, it's helping the family unit as a team. Yet they have to be constantly reminded, or recently aren't bothering to do it at all.

Interested in others thoughts...thank you.

Is the cat their pet? If no, then I wouldn’t expect them to be clearly up cat shit.

It’s normal or teenagers to have chores. It’s normal for them to whinge about it.

This looks like a pretty light load: definitely reasonable for their ages. Their reactions are also totally normal I'm afraid. Teenagers do not like doing chores.

That's not much at all. My 12 year old sweeps the floors (in the main living area, not the whole house) every day, empties the dishwasher every day and does the dishes 3 times a week, and scrubs the wet room floor once a week.

What's the consequence if they don't bother to do it? Mine loses her pocket money if she doesn't do her jobs (exceptions made for illness or if she has an unusually large homework load)

This seems very light on chores for teenagers. When we were teens my siblings and I had daily chores like take turns at clearing/setting the table for dinner, making our beds, etc. and then had 1-2 other weekly chores assigned each e.g. vacuum upstairs or downstairs, emptying bins, dusting, ironing, mopping. It was how we earned our 'pocket money'

That's not much at all for kids of that age to do.

My GC are 12 and 9. They hoover their own rooms, load pt empty the dishwasher, and set the table for dinner.

I believe that if children have chores to do but don't do them, they should have privileges taken away - no iPad/tv/computer/pocket money, whatever it might be

I never did "chores" when I was a kid, but I was a pretty rotten kid lol. I personally think looking after the cat is a good way to give the kids responsibility for sure and yeah dishwasher is a good idea. Not unreasonable at all.

Doing the litter tray is unreasonable in my opinion. It's my most hated chore in the house so I definitely wouldn't expect my kids to do it.

11 year old has to feed the dog everyday, make their bed every day, tidy her room everyday, change her bedsheets once a week, hang washing out if and when needed also folds and puts into baskets if there's some already out this might be once a week if I'm busy doing other things, she hoovers occasionally. she doesn't have set jobs apart from her room, her bed and the dog but she is asked daily to help do something around the house.

Depends how they feel about thecat. A pet they wanted/asked for? Totally reasonable. One they aren't fussed about and had no choice over? Perhaps not.

I do think kids should be doing chores at that age, for lots of reasons. But those chores are probably best if things relating to them and personal responsibility. So loading the dishwasher - yup, they eat food off plates so dishwasher is reasonable. Their own laundry, some vacuuming, a turn at communal areas like kitchen/bathroom, sure. Cat I think depends on whose cat it is. Litter tray does also sound like an unpleasant job....

Those chores are fine

You are not alone in having to remind them it drives me up the wall - it’s ridiculous isn’t it?

sometimes I’m nice about it and sometimes I shout about it because it’s just constant!!

Update - yes the cat is the 16 yo's pet. When I say change the cat litter, it's not like they have to pick poo out of it, we use a bag thing, you just undo it without having to touch the poo/wee, simply needs putting in the outside bin, put a new bag in the tray, and pour in some litter.

I guess the bigger issue here is that my wife doesn't apply things the same as me.

I am a firm believer in come in from school, spend 10 minutes doing the jobs, then you can go off and do what you want, your jobs are done.
My wife is the polar opposite, fun etc is most important, come in, do what you want but then jobs don't get done - the thing is there is never a consequence.
Things don't get done, I say something and I'm told "it'll be done tomorrow", but they aren't...we can go 3 days maybe without the cat litter getting changed, the dishwasher getting sorted, it's disgusting, but why should I do it if the kids don't and their mum doesn't?

Not so long ago I was told 'scraping plates is not a nice job for children to do'.
There seems to be an argument for everything, for them not to have to do the jobs they are asked to do.

I think that is the next problem. As their step-dad I am unable to do anything, my wife simply doesn't agree with me and won't back me up with this. So I either keep quiet, or WW3 breaks out...