11mo still feeds to sleep, frequent wakes

[MissHoney85]

DS is 11mo and still feeds to sleep for every nap and night. He also wakes very often. A good night is 3-4 wakes, and he often wakes much more frequently than that. I feed him to sleep for every wake, though I'm sure he can't be hungry.

DD was a similarly bad sleeper as a baby but I'm sure by 11m she had started to self settle and lost interest in breast feeding. DS is showing no signs of either yet. I feel ready to stop breastfeeding him (partly as I think it might help his sleep, but I'm also just ready to have my body back). But if I dare to not feed him to sleep he screams and I can't take it. I don't really know any other way to settle a baby - I don't know if I'm doing it wrong but things like shush-pat or the Ferber Method have never worked for either of my babies, they just scream and get more and more worked up, and I end up giving in. It's especially hard to dedicate the time to it this time around with a toddler who hates the sound of the baby crying.

I'm at a bit of a loss. Has anyone been here before? Do I just have to wait for something to click in his brain or is there something else I can try?

I’m here with you too. Although not sure I’m ready to wean but I want some sleep and not comfort feeding / being the sole person able to out baby to sleep!

Dont have any advice here I’m afraid but you’re not alone 🙃 x

I’ve not done this myself as I’m happy having a magic boob 😂 but when I’ve read different things they talk about habit stacking. So when you feed add tapping or stroking, maybe a comforter as well. Then you start to feed to sleep but stop feeding half way. But continue with the other things. Gradually reducing the feed length until you don’t feed. As I have said, it’s not something I’ve tried but it seems like in theory it should work.

I also am so sorry to say I am in the same boat as you! Mine’s a little older than yours though. I have started doing the thing a previous poster mentioned re habit stacking - so I’ve introduced a small soft toy comforter and the plan is to give to him alongside the feed every night for a week at least and then I’m going to start shortening feeds. I also can’t stand the crying so just going to try and really commit to doing things slowly and gently.

good luck!

DD is 5.5months and I have decided I am done with the feeding sleep association and cant really continue it with returning to work on the horizon and the need to start some medication in the next few months which means EBF will have to stop. I have been habbit stacking and I think it's worked DD wants the whole experince to fall asleep now so shuushing, rocking tapping and feeding i didnt really know where to go from there i was just going to try cold turkeyon the feeding but sraged reduction is a fabulous method thanks for posting. I actually have never monitored how long she feeds for so I will do a few more days of fully letting her feed and time it so have a benchmark to start cutting it. As she is 5.5months I'm hoping It's a quicker to break but she's very very associated to feeding to sleep so this is a difficult time.