7 month old overtired and confusing me

[Sarahpoet]

Hello Everyone,
I have a 7 month old who lately has been majorly confusing me. She’s been overtired on and off for a month. We only just caught up (maybe needed a few more days) with her sleep then we were pushed back easily from going to France and then her schedule had too long a break before bed, or a late bedtime a few times which were just inevitable at the time. She mostly sleeps in the sling with me, some naps have been in the pram but when overtired sling is better and I linked her sleep cycles by giving her some milk a month ago, now just shushing her back to sleep.

I am 100% devoted to trying to get her to be balanced with her schedule. She was 6 months and at the time she was sleeping much better 1.5 hrs in the morning then another hour or 45 mins and again another 30/45 mins in the third nap. Wake windows were about two hours each I believe I was just following the huckleberry app. she woke at 6, first nap 7.45/8, second nap at about 11.30/12. This went on for a couple of weeks and then one day all of the sudden she stopped wanting her nap at that time and it didn’t matter if I was trying early or later something wasn’t working. Took me a couple of weeks of stress - then she napped well after an hour and a half awake in the morning stretch
Nap 7.30-9.30
Nap 12- 12.40
Nap 3- 3.30
(That was a good day!)
one day around that her nap was much later at 8.30 maybe threw her off - it’s possible lack of exact consistency every single day due to the France trip we had.
That day was one of the better days but then when I put her to nap again at 7.15 or 7.30 the next few days she only had a 30 minute nap (which leads me to believe the long nap was from being overtired and catching up)

Now she is 7 months and I feel like that last month was a struggle (honestly I went on mumsnet before read about getting a sleep coach even though I preferred to sort it myself, my partner didn’t think I needed one, but when your worried about your babies development and brain from lack of sleep you would do anything just to get her to have better sleep!)

I have carried on without any help just reading multiple articles about wake windows and over and under tiredness. Honestly I’m still confused.

She wasn’t sleeping too badly in France in the night but lately she is waking multiple times in the night every night at the moment she has a false start? So wakes after 45 mins or so I’ll put her back to bed and then sometimes she will wake a second time and then she will stay asleep and a couple of mornings at she woke at 3/4/5 in the morning. Last night she just woke at 8.30/12am/4.30 am wasn’t too bad but she is still looking and behaving overtired. yesterdays naps were 8.30-9 (tried offering an early nap at 7.30 but she didn’t want it so it became 8.30 and then a short nap?) then 10.45-11.45 average time at the moment second nap normally goes well then third nap my partner took her out 1.15 before bed (told him max one hour but he let her sleep more and then of course that pushed bedtime :( to 6.30! That’s the second time her last nap was quite long with him as well.

ok lastly I’ll talk about bedtime it is meant to be 6pm. It became early as I made bedtime earlier and have done ever since she’s showed signs of overtiredness. So made bedtime 4.30/5or 5.30 as I would make up for what she didn’t nap on some days. Some days in this period she would just have a catnap at all three naps.

this morning it isn’t matter if I offered an earlier nap at 7for 7.15? She still resisted until 8 behaved the same way resisting and then settled for 40 mins. I don’t feel confident with that at all. I’m defeated now I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Maybe the late bedtime last night made her more tired and she is just not able to settle well for that nap. They say shorten wake windows when they are overtired which is what I am doing….?

currently her wake windows are 1.5 hrs or Two hours in the morning

6 am wake
1st nap 7.30- 8 or 8.30-9 nap (tried different things)
Second nap 11.30-12.30
third nap 2.45-3.15 or 3-3.30
A couple of third naps have been 1 hr long

I hope this can make some sense to you all out there. I am currently exclusively pumping STILL with the desire to bring her back to breast. She was latching on again a month ago and we were making progress!!! Then this bloody overtiredness has created disinterest she sometimes will still go on top of me but she won’t suckle just play and smile. She hasn’t been herself enough looking tired and sometimes not wanting her solids :( do not good. Honestly it’s been tough she had a tounge tie and it messed my breastfeeding journey. I have to supplement more atm as I miss pumping sessions due to prioritising her naps if needed just to get in top of it! The balance has gone! Once upon a time it worked well. she dropped in the percentile lines as well in her first month but she is steadily growing on the 9th line(she dropped a few major lines) so as you can imagine anything preventing her from eating or drinking her milk is just too painful.

maybe the solution is to lengthen her wake windows? But the thing is - how do you do that when they are overtired. I guess I’ll keep an eye after a few days of early bedtimes and see if she catches up.

I hope this makes sense once again sorry it’s lengthy I am so so tired I’ve been awake putting her to sleep but also I have to pump to maintain my supply lately I’m doing 6 hour breaks because I’m dead and need to get back on track with her. Please help!

Thank you so much 🙏

Hi OP. Sorry you're having such a stressful time of it at the minute. I would say sometimes you can look into things too much which can makes things more confusing!

First off I always recommend Lydney hookway on IG for any information on sleep, she's saved my sanity many times.

Secondly - what it is that makes you think she's overtired? Sometimes babies go through fussy phaes unrelated to being tired. There's so much development going on at 7 months! I think my DD was the same.

If I were you, I'd take a few days of trying not to worry (harder than it sounds I know). If she refuses a nap, try again in 15mins. Bed time might need to be later. DD went through a phase of napping for 30mins or so at 5ish and so bed time was 830/9pm. Its now about 730/8 now she's almost 9 months.

Naps are so tricky aren't they, and affect so much. It's a break and a rest for us so it's so hard when they don't go to plan. Ds transitioned to 2 naps at 7 months. It was tough whilst it happened and his sleep went to pot. But maybe she's starting the transition. It might be some days she still has 3 naps but others she has 2. She might need an early bed time on the days she has 2 naps for a while. Try some different things and see how it goes. You may see her naps lengthen when she goes to two as well. DS would have a lovely 2 hour morning nap it was bliss.
4:30/5 sounds much to early for a bedtime. I would call an 'early' bedtime 6:15/6:30.
7 months is also prime age for teething. Could her fussiness be because of this?
Re her not wanting solids, at 7 months I wouldn't put this down to being tired. It's normal for babies of 7 months to not really be interested. I'd say DS only really got into his food consistently from around 10 months.

I also wondered if, actually, she needs longer wake windows. 2-3.5 hours is typical at 7 months, so your current schedule is on the short side for wake windows (which would be completely fine if it was working well for her). A short last wake window, in particular, leads to rubbish night sleep for a lot of babies, as they just aren't tired enough – most people would say you want the last wake window to be the longest. (Full disclosure, neither of mine read that bit of the guidance; they both preferred pretty equal wake windows across the day.)

To get longer wake windows, you either need to drop a nap or shorten the overnight sleep. At seven months, it might be your choice which, although I think most go down to two naps by 8 or 9 months, so any new routine might last longer if you try the two naps approach. A 2-3-4 schedule (2 hours from wake to first nap, 3 between first and second, 4 between second and bed) is popular.

I would try not to worry too much about the total amount of sleep she's getting – 13-15 hours is typical for the age, and even with two naps or a shorter nighttime sleep, she'll still be getting that. I'd also try not to get too set on the exact timings, baby sleep is just such a moving target. She'll probably gradually want to nap a little less, or stay up a little later, and so on as her sleep needs drop, and then as she moves towards one nap.

And yes, consider if she's teething, and don't worry too much about the solids – most babies her age are still very much in the experimenting with flavours and textures phase.