Age appropriate viewing

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Hi everybody.

I'm not especially bothered about my 6 year old son seeing things which are a bit above his age grade on YouTube but it is driving my partner wild.

By default YouTube content has limits which top out in areas like actual harm (rather than baddies fighting goodies in a trailer for a film for instance) and porn and that sort of thing. So I'm fairly comfortable he isn't going to be able to actually see anything that's really truly harmful.

I know from being in the house with someone who takes the opposite view that my standpoint isn't universally accepted and I'm familiar with all the arguments against it. As far as I'm concerned I feel having drummed it into him that everything he sees on YouTube isn't real and made on computers that he knows he's watching fake stuff.

My partner will allow him to watch higher rated films if pre-approved. i.e. if we know what's in it then we may let him watch a 12-rated film (some of the Harry Potter films are 12-rated).

I have two questions if I've not bored people to death already:

1. Does exposure to computer generated monsters (animated spiders for instance) and shark attacks and that sort of thing pose a real risk to children or are there benefits to broadening their horizons by allowing them to see new things they've not seen before to keep them learning and increasing vocabulary, knowledge of the world etc?
2. Is there a way to set up home theatre equipment so it is guaranteed they can only view safe content if they come in from school and grab the remote and have free reign to browse while we're doing housework and not directly helicoptering? We were able to put a PIN on Amazon Prime but can't seem to do anything about YouTube. We would like him to be able to use the TV but not to be able to look up monster movie trailers. With Amazon Prime he is ridiculous, he opens it and browses through pictures of films but can't access any of them because you have to put in a PIN to be able to play the film. Anybody got a safe setup that allows freedom but has limits? What equipment / services do you have?

There is ‘YouTube kids’ specifically for this reason

Isn’t that exactly what YouTube kids is? Although I hate it for the mindless dopamine scrolling. And on Amazon Prime etc you can create a kids profile that weeds out any inappropriate content. I spent ages wondering if Disney Plus had removed The Bear last week but nope I was on the kids profile and it didn’t even show it existed as any searches only show results that are rated appropriate for kids.

But you know your own child and I think you can’t get out of policing it completely because it’s so individual. I know 6YOs who are fine with the gory stuff you get in nature documentaries but were scared during the Paw Patrol movie.

And by cartoon monsters, spiders and sharks what do you even mean? Baby shark is aimed at toddlers, I doubt a 6YO would want to watch it and it’s definitely garbage but it’s not going to be harmful. Something like the film Monsters Inc probably fine too. That giant Spider in the Harry Potter film though, even I think that’s scary!

With the YouTube kids our Roku 'set top box' thing does not maintain the settings. So if he logs out of YouTube kids then it disappears from the App. Next time you open it the app wants to be logged in with a normal adult profile or it just shows the 'guest' screen with non-personalised stuff.

So what gear do other people use which makes it possible to enforce YouTube kids?

Have you considered using net nanny?

This is a very backward attitude - iPads and tv can be just as educational as books

This is on the TV in the lounge... not a desktop / laptop

Isn’t YouTube kids an entirely separate app to normal YouTube? We only have it on an ipad though, not on the TV. Does he need YouTube on the TV though? I don’t know what you subscribe too but we have Amazon, Netflix and Disney and there’s already more kids content then they could ever possibly watch. Each one is set up with a kids profile, you can make it their name and set a character icon, so they know which one to select then they can choose from there. Netflix is pretty intuitive. My 6YO can’t get to grips with Disney so would ask if she wants a specific movie from there, which I’d want her to do anyway.

He's completed books. I know every parent thinks their kid is smart but he's way ahead of everybody else at school. This is part of the problem, he's constantly seeking new information and gets bored if you try to limit his viewing when he knows he could be looking at an unlimited view if logged into a regular profile so he starts messing around logging out of YouTube kids and opening different apps.

What do you mean he’s ‘completed books’? Doesn’t everyone finish a book then start a new one?

Re his TV viewing though it actually sounds like it’s more a behavioural issue which is something else entirely. And it’s hard to lock things down completely because even some stuff that isn’t rated isn’t ideal viewing a 6YO eg a lot of the storylines on soaps.

When you’re not free to closely supervise then I’d say he can watch whatever he wants from Kids Netflix and if you catch him watching anything else then the TV goes off. If you really don’t trust him then you could also let him choose something then take the remote with you. If there are already concentration issues then the mindless scrolling of YouTube is probably the last thing he needs so I’d seek to limit that. If he’s interested in ‘sharks’ or whatever then that’s probably something you should research and watch together to make sure he ends up with an appropriate nature programme and not Sharknado 2.

But also it’s easier to lock down an ipad than the family TV- only youtube kids with a passcode set to change the settings (it defaults to timestables which I’m sure he knows as a bright 6YO), delete safari, only a kids profile on netflix, app store requires your approval etc etc

Don't use YouTube unless it's under supervision. Children's content on iPlayer is better quality and more age appropriate. I'm with your partner.

Sharknado is one of his favourites. He isn't able to see the whole film but on YouTube he has looked up clips of it. It's precisely the gnashing of teeth and high pace action that he's into. He got to Sharknado from one of his other passions which is tornados. Also likes earthquakes and tsunamis.

I think we have tried pretty much all of the solutions you've listed but he works out ways around the barriers such as fetching a remote control from another room and carrying on as if we hadn't taken the remote.

He's got a kindle with a kids profile on it and we've pre-approved particular films which are on there but he gets likes being able to scroll and choose.

We don't do iPlayer, we have no TV license.

I think at the moment I'm just going to have to see if I can find an alternative to Roku which allows PIN to lock out apps.

Sign your child up to their own kids google account and link it to a your own Google account via Google Family Link. From here you can set age and time limits for YouTube (and all other apps) when you sign in to youtube with the kids account.

You just have to be hyper vigilant over what they are watching. It's hard because they will seek it out, eg YouTube over YouTube kids. That has been our experience. It becomes forbidden fruit. My son loves gaming play through. But you have to know about each channel 👀🙄👀 and assess if it's age appropriate. Some are benign and healthy, like Zebra Gamer, others are not, like Beck Bro Jack, due to swearing and the games played being adult in tone. It's super difficult. I will not miss this aspect of parenting when DCs are older!

Turn the water supply off and the gas and electric too. I jest, the internet is a utility in the modern world and advising it be turned off isn't really an answer IMHO.

He is 6, he should only use it supervised by an adult.

How can he have completed books? If he likes information, there are endless books out there.

I had this issue and I told my children that they either just viewed kids YouTube or they didn't have YouTube at all. It did the trick, they have their own profiles on the app on the TV and when it does log out they either tell me and I sort it or they watch the one as a guest.

I think you just have to set really clear boundaries- either he stays on the kids stuff or it’s no screen time at all. And make sure you police it eg if you’re cooking in the kitchen and he’s in the living keep popping your head round the door to check. Sharknado is a 15 so it’s widely inappropriate that he’s viewing any of it. Hence why he needs to be on youtube kids not regular youtube.

He's completed books?
Sorry, but what does this even mean? He's read all the school reading scheme up to age 11 and every other book up to Harry Potter type content?

Re YouTube, we removed the app from the TV and put Kids YouTube on. Kids can access TV onto Netflix (child profile only), normal telly, Amazon prime (child profile) or you tube kid's. So I'd remove the YouTube app. Because he's I do think it's damaging for them to be exposed to good only knows what and you have no control over what he accesses, what should through etc. We periodically get emails at school about videos doing the rounds around self harm or dangerous behaviour.

If he can only access YouTube Mugs with a login, then log him in. It's not like he's at home alone. If you're working perhaps write down the log in details for him, just make sure the password is different to your other things

T h op it sounds like you aren't really bothered about putting limits on because he's not like other children and children as intelligent as your child should never have their curiosity hampered / you shouldn't have to supervise him properly now he's so clever and wise.

I think we have found the boomer @Landmary

what outdated and old fashioned views you keep spouting as if they have any relevance