Struggling

[Ld1924]

I have an almost 9 month old, and I dont know why I'm just really struggling with it all, and everytime I try to talk to someone they brush me off as being silly. Don't get me wrong I absolutely adore my LO, but I just feel like I'm completely useless for him, We're in the midst of weaning, and we've deduced that he's got a Milk allergy or atleast an intolerance (have spoken to doctors but they say he's too young for a blood test, and to avoid milk) I asked about his formula and they weren't exactly helpful, I just feel stupid that I didn't connect the dots before, I had previously taken him to the doctors about eczema and they didn't even mention food allergies.

I dont have many friends, or many mum friends, and the ones I do, I just feel like I'm asking question after questions, and everytime I try to bring up feeling like this they say I'm overthinking it all. I dont know how to snap out of this, everyone that I know with 9 month olds seems to be doing just fine.

I dont know whether its the fact I return to work this week, but I'm literally second guessing everything I do with him, and I'm just stressing, even about things that aren't baby related, and I've probably cried more this week than I have in the last year. I just want to be the best for him, but I just don't know how to be a mum. And I just feel bad for the LO.

The fact you’re so concerned about getting it right shows what a great mum you are!

Nobody knows what to do with their first baby it’s trial and error. I still question everything with dc1 even now when older as each year brings new challenges! You’re doing fine and why would you think your baby had a milk allergy unless you’re a doctor

Have you changed his formula? If it's a milk allergy/intolerance that would definitely help his skin. Mine has an intolerance but I knew it really early but only because I myself don't drink cows milk. I'm the same as you, no mom friends and feeling like I'm just annoying people when I'm asking questions. You've got this, you're obviously a great mom to be so worried about it at all.

I asked his Doctor about changing it cause I was explaining it was worse when I gave him in a food product, both cottage pie and cheesy pie, both milk containing both gave him a reaction (scratching at his face, it was like he suddenly has hayfever, watery eyes, ezcema flared) his reaction wasn't so bad with formula, but his poos haven't been right. I looked at all the packages earlier, and formula was 3% cheesy pie 10% and cottage pie was a little lower. I'm literally grasping at straws, and it could be something other than milk, but its the only common denominator in what I've tried him with. Tried him with only meals that didn't contain milk, and he doesn't have the same reaction.

Ask GP for dairy free formula or buy some yourself and see how he is. I don't know which ones are dairy free that you can buy yourself, mine has sma soya but doctors were really funny about boys having it, but as I knew it was working for him I kept him on it. And the paediatric doctor said when he was 1yr old that as he was obviously thriving to keep him on the toddler soya. It's awkward weaning dairy free but not impossible. Sounds like you buy the dinky dinners which I did too. There are a good few that don't have cheese and milk in, you will spend lots of time reading packaging but it will definitely be worth it for your son 😊

Op, my ds is 15 and I'm still doing that. Second guessing which way is best to revise, which 6th form would suit him best, which a'levels.

It does get easier but I promise you everyone has the same issues because dcs are all different and there is no manual.

You're doing fine. You're paying attention and adapting as you go. You and your LO will be fine.

I would ask for some advice from your Health Visitor.