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Original poster

Getting Rid of the Dummy

14 replies

hja62 · 03/10/2023 21:01

DD is 19 months old and I want to try and get rid of the dummy. She only gets it at night going to bed, and occasionally on long car journeys and generally doesn't ask for it at any other times. But as soon as she gets into her PJs at night she asks for it and if she wakes during the night and can't find it she will cry "dodi" until one of us gets up to help her find it. So she has strong sleep associations with it.

I have read the usual stories about the "dummy fairy" or leaving it for Santa but I'm not sure is she old enough to understand this? Or maybe she is and I'm not giving her enough credit.

Or do we just go cold Turkey and ride out the screaming for a few nights??

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SErunner · 03/10/2023 21:49

I think you basically have to go cold turkey to get rid. If she's only using it for sleep though I wouldn't rush to get rid of it. Just bung loads in the cot with her so you don't have to get up in the night - our daughter has 6!

EpitomeofEpiphany · 03/10/2023 21:56

I didn't like the idea of fairy dummy, I find it confusing and a bit weird. Although you are welcome to think my approach was weird too, but it worked for us!... I told my little one who was about 24 months that he's a big boy now and big boys don't have dummys so you have to put it in the bin. Then since you're a big boy you'll get a big boy present. Then gave him a new toy.

Since he put the dummy in the bin himself he knew it was gone. He already knew what a bin was so no need to explain that. He did cry for it for a day or two but after that he was fine.

LunaDreams · 05/10/2023 14:03

We took our sons dummy away just before his 2nd birthday. I felt he was too young to understand concept of dummy fairy etc so we went semi-cold turkey...we initially just gave it to him for his daytime nap for a week, and he didn't have it at night. Then we took it away from the day time nap so he didn't have it all.

I was shocked at how quickly he got used to not having it. They're quick to forget these things when they're this young. It's been helpful as he has now learnt to settle to sleep himself without it.

Good luck OP!

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Cinders15 · 05/10/2023 14:15

We said that it would be good for another little boy or girl to have it, so she did a little letter and gave it to Santa to pass on to the next boy or girl

Totalwasteofpaper · 05/10/2023 14:18

We are in the same boat. She is too young for a dummy fairy etc.
We have managed to successfully get rid of it for naps but nights we just couldn't do.
we got to night 4 of totally broken sleep and cracked. We resolved to try again later

Fluffycloudsblusky · 05/10/2023 14:24

DC 1 we have it to the dummy fairy. He got a gift in exchange. Went fine. Few difficult nights. But he was 2 I think.
DC2 we gave it to the ducks at Center parks. He seemed ok at the time. But then we went back a year later and he threw stones at the ducks because he was so angry they had his dummy.

not really sure which method was better. Depends on child’s temperament and level of depends on the dummy I guess

Original poster
hja62 · 05/10/2023 20:37

SErunner · 03/10/2023 21:49

I think you basically have to go cold turkey to get rid. If she's only using it for sleep though I wouldn't rush to get rid of it. Just bung loads in the cot with her so you don't have to get up in the night - our daughter has 6!

She has about 4 in the cot and by the morning they're all thrown out onto the floor whatever she is doing in the night!!

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Original poster
hja62 · 05/10/2023 20:38

EpitomeofEpiphany · 03/10/2023 21:56

I didn't like the idea of fairy dummy, I find it confusing and a bit weird. Although you are welcome to think my approach was weird too, but it worked for us!... I told my little one who was about 24 months that he's a big boy now and big boys don't have dummys so you have to put it in the bin. Then since you're a big boy you'll get a big boy present. Then gave him a new toy.

Since he put the dummy in the bin himself he knew it was gone. He already knew what a bin was so no need to explain that. He did cry for it for a day or two but after that he was fine.

This sounds really promising!!! My fear is she'd go into the bin after it the next day!

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Original poster
hja62 · 05/10/2023 20:38

LunaDreams · 05/10/2023 14:03

We took our sons dummy away just before his 2nd birthday. I felt he was too young to understand concept of dummy fairy etc so we went semi-cold turkey...we initially just gave it to him for his daytime nap for a week, and he didn't have it at night. Then we took it away from the day time nap so he didn't have it all.

I was shocked at how quickly he got used to not having it. They're quick to forget these things when they're this young. It's been helpful as he has now learnt to settle to sleep himself without it.

Good luck OP!

Thanks so much for sharing!! I hope our experience is as positive as yours! Sounds like going cold Turkey is the best option....

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Original poster
hja62 · 05/10/2023 20:39

Cinders15 · 05/10/2023 14:15

We said that it would be good for another little boy or girl to have it, so she did a little letter and gave it to Santa to pass on to the next boy or girl

This is such a lovely idea! How old were your DC when you did this? I feel like DD might be a bit young to understand still.

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Original poster
hja62 · 05/10/2023 20:40

Totalwasteofpaper · 05/10/2023 14:18

We are in the same boat. She is too young for a dummy fairy etc.
We have managed to successfully get rid of it for naps but nights we just couldn't do.
we got to night 4 of totally broken sleep and cracked. We resolved to try again later

I'm pretty sure this is exactly what is going to happen here....!

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Original poster
hja62 · 05/10/2023 20:40

Fluffycloudsblusky · 05/10/2023 14:24

DC 1 we have it to the dummy fairy. He got a gift in exchange. Went fine. Few difficult nights. But he was 2 I think.
DC2 we gave it to the ducks at Center parks. He seemed ok at the time. But then we went back a year later and he threw stones at the ducks because he was so angry they had his dummy.

not really sure which method was better. Depends on child’s temperament and level of depends on the dummy I guess

I got such a laugh out of this !!! Brilliant.

OP posts:
rootsandwings89 · 05/10/2023 20:42

I could have written this post myself OP! Our DS is now 19 months too, he doesn't have his dummy during the day but he does during his naps and when he sleeps at night. He sometimes cries when it's taken off him (or swapped for a biscuit) after his afternoon nap but is easily distracted. But I dread going cold turkey at nighttime. My DD is 6, she was never bothered about a dummy so we've never had this problem before!

Wineocloc · 05/10/2023 20:43

You’ll need to go cold turkey and just get rid of it. I kept it until about 3 for dd(only for night time) as they had no probs putting it back in themselves. Dummy fairy came and took it away and there were no tears as she felt like a big kid. She hasn’t got any problems with her teeth, she only had it at night and it usually fell out anyway.

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