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Stopping breastfeeding with baby with a temper

4 replies

DGGR · 01/10/2023 10:11

I want to stop breastfeeding.

I've done it before cold turkey at 18m due to emergency health issues & me needing a cocktail of meds I couldn't breastfeed with.

Luckily at the time he was only having a small feed at bed and waking so I didn't even need to express (I was too ill to anyway).

DS2 is just coming up to 1... I'd only wanted to feed until 1 because I'm delaying botox treatment for nerve damage in my face and would like to be able to have it done to manage the pain I get with it.

My periods have also come back every 1-2 months which knocks my supply right out for a good 2 weeks, which has been really challenging with a busy walking 11m old so we've resorted to bed sharing and feeding lots overnight to keep my supply up.

He will take a bottle but doesn't like his allergy formula very much (we've tried lots) and I just can't be bothered to pump anymore, they're too busy (and I tried a hands free one which was awful).
He won't take a dummy, which is also part of the problem as every time he's teething he bites and has an awful latch so my nipples are in agony.

He's also got a temper. I'm not worried developmentally as he's hit all his milestones and will laugh back if you laugh and is very sociable. But he's 90th percentile weight and height and very strong. So when he doesn't get what he really wants- usually an issue with boob especially if tired and hungry- he lashes out (obviously not knowing what he's really doing) and pushes and screams so loud he's quite difficult to manage.

When he was born all the consultants mentioned he was feisty (in NICU for breathing difficulties) and I might have trouble with him. I don't know whether that's got into my head, as I was pretty worried at the comments in my post partum state. But he just had his first day in daycare and she said he had got... Angry... With a puzzled look on her face. Like it was unusual.

Thankfully it's short and sharp, he'll have a paddy and 5 seconds later is smiling again although I think for other carers ie husband/daycare it goes on a bit longer.

He's obviously going through some separation anxiety at the moment too.

Basically what I'm asking is...
Have you got any tips for weaning off breastfeeding? (we're also in the middle of the milk ladder which is going well so I'm hoping I can eventually give regular formula/milk which I think he'll enjoy more. His main allergy is egg) I know it's going to be an issue for him and hell be very upset.

And also does anyone else have a baby with a temper? It seems unusual 🤔

Thanks for reading my ramble!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Caspianberg · 01/10/2023 10:17

With Ds also around 18 months, when I wanted to stop.
Firstly I stopped all days feeds bar first and last thing. I introduced a beaker with soft spout of regular milk around 3pm after nap.
Then after around a week Stopped morning. By dh taking him straight downstairs and giving him some cherrios and banana as snack. Cup milk
Evening I stopped by dh also taking over a few days of reading two books and settling to bed without me. Water in bedroom.

Geneticsbunny · 01/10/2023 10:48

It might be helpful to reframe feisty as passionate, determined and independent so that you can help your child see it as a positive thing which will help her/him get where they need in life. I am saying this as a mum of a passionate child who has learned to roll with it rather than fighting it.
If she/ he recovers quickly from being upset then I would just go cold turkey and they will quickly learn that milk is off the cards. I reckon you might have a few days of rage and then they will learn.

User69611 · 01/10/2023 12:38

Will probably get slammed for this but I put apple cider vinegar on my nipples for a day or two (baby was 17mo so a bit older), soon got that they tasted funny and no longer asked for it almost immediately. But had about 3 hellish nights of crying/grieving it, then she was fine. (Cutting down gradually just didn’t work. This weirdly felt kinder to me than saying no as it was like the milk just had gone bad rather than me personally denying her her main comfort!).

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gotomomo · 01/10/2023 12:43

I cut down (replacing with food, (cows) milk in a cup and watered down apple juice) then cut all daytime feeds before finally cutting overnight feeds when (now ex) h took over dealing with them for the first few days. Worked fine but were closer to 18 months no allergies

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