AIBU to think the nurse should have managed this differently?

[SadDustBunny]

Took my 2yo to get routine vaccines and well baby visit. And goodness I know she’s still young but the nurse wanted to remove her nappy to weigh and measure her height while naked. I told her she can take instructions to stand on a scale and be weighed measured now as she does it at home but the nurse insisted. I didn’t say anything but it felt like DD was getting a bit old for this.

I’m not planning to file a formal complaint or anything it just felt uncomfortable for me and DD looked like she was actually feeling a bit self conscious.

It’s quite normal to be weighed without a nappy, plus she has to check children for signs of abuse.

Neither of my children were weighed naked at their 2.5 Yr HV check. They stood on a scale like a grown up would. Neither was wearing a nappy at that age though, but in at least one of the appointments the HV hadn't realised that at the weighing stage so clearly it didn't matter either way.

Do you mean your little one stands on the scale to be weighed at home, OP?

Why?

I didn’t make her do it or anything but she caught me weighing myself and started doing it for fun. She takes instructions well so I know if simply asked she could do it easily.

@BlueIgIoo

Thank you. That is a bit of a relief. I don’t really think I would feel comfortable with her being stripped down at every doctors appointment from this point on unless there is a medical issue that calls for such a task.

This is normal if she is under 2 (I think?) - is she actually 2 or nearly 2?. I remember asking the HV when we’d stop stripping the child to weigh them, she said it’s from 2 years old. I assumed the weight charts account for a wet nappy over the age of 2 (or it matters less as a few hundred grams of wee is less of a % of their weight?) but not for under 2s.

I think you’re worrying unnecessarily, weighing is not compulsory at any of these checks anyway so you can always decline if it bothers you that much, or weigh her yourself at home.

It was 2 weeks after her second birthday but she was a preemie by 6 weeks if that matters. But she has hit all of her milestones based on her day of birth not gestational age.

I don’t remember any of mine being weighed naked once up and about.

Beside the point, I know, but as I was trying to remember how this went down for my DC, I recalled that in my area the HV service was so understaffed that DS wasn’t offered his 2 year check until he was 3.5. And then they asked all the questions you’d ask for a 2 year old, so the whole thing was totally pointless and confusing. But nobody made him take his clothes off at least.

They have set ages for these things. I think pre 2 its naked, 2-3 with underwear, and 3+ with clothes.

My youngest needs regular weighing due to medical issues (and struggles to put on weight). When she turned 3, they first started weighing her with clothes and then marveled at how she'd put on half a kilo in month 🙄

Nappies can be heavy. It makes sense to remove them.

Under 2s get weighed naked and 2 and above in underwear but not a nappy so if not potty trained it would have to be naked.

If your two year old genuinely felt uncomfortable about being naked, perhaps look at why she would feel shame about her body at this age.

It’s not normal for a child this young to feel ‘uncomfortable’ about being naked.

They shouldn’t really register it either way if you’re there and it’s part of a normal, everyday procedure such as a health check.

Most two year olds (not all) are still having their nappies changed at nursery by staff members. They certainly don’t feel ‘uncomfortable’ about it. It’s just another, normal part of their day.
I think you’re projecting your own issues here.

I really don't think a 2 year old felt self conscious being naked.

I am sorry but this is madness. Your two year old should have no knowledge of body shame or indeed weighing herself. Perhaps think about what you may be subliminally teaching your child about her body.

Why are you weighing yourself in front of your child at home? Then letting her look at her own weight ? Sorry that's weird and no wonder she's self conscious about her body at 2 yeas old!

No 2 year old I have ever known has been uneasy about being naked. Quite the opposite usually 😉

Agree with above. If your child is self conscious at 2 that is a huge concern. What actually happened is you're annoyed this 'young' nurse ignored your suggestion and pretending your child was somehow bothered adds gravitas to your annoyance. Just stop it

I really don't think it's that big a big deal to let your young DC stand on the scales at home as long as the parent isn't making a big deal of it!

I've weighed DD when buying car seats for example. Because she's quite light for her age, when she reached the age bracket for a high backed booster she hadn't yet reached the minimum weight.

If nothing else stop weighing yourself in front of your child, no child does this for fun.
Separate your own issues from child
or fully expect them to have body image issues from a young age.