Where can I get help?

[DueyCheatemAndHow]

I've posted a lot over the years and everyone has been lovely. But I need proper direct help. Our children are just turned 5 and almost 3 and honestly I dread the days. I'm at the end of my rope. Who can help me?

Thank you.

Anyone?

What sort of help do you need?

Sorry you’re having a bad time. Are you still in touch/can you get in touch with the health visiting team as the first port of call as you have a preschooler? And/or anyone helpful at 5yo’s school who can liaise with services for you? Hope you manage to get some help and support.

Children's centres/family hubs are a great place to start. Early Help teams often work from them. Your Health visitor will know of lots of support.

Have you heard of Homestart? They are volunteers who will spend time with you and offer support in many different ways. I've had friends with Homestart workers who came and occupied their children so they could tidy/nap whatever.

Thanks so much for the suggestions.

It's not so much an extra pair of hands (tho I'd never turn it down!) I need someone who can watch how we are as a family and give DH and I some help about how we manage our children because we clearly are clueless.

Maybe contact the Early Help team at your local council. Ask them if they can work with you, or refer you to parenting classes.

Can your 5 year old’s school help ?

Hello I am sorry to hear that things are so difficult at the moment.
If I remember correctly your DH is a high earning lawyer? If this is correct it gives you a few more options - from your update, it sounds like one option would be a parenting coach? I am a lawyer & several of the speakers at our firm’s wellbeing/ family talks are parenting experts who offer this service and it would mean someone could observe what is going on and help you both develop more effective strategies? If issues are more severe then you could consider some kind of systemic family therapy? This may be available under your DH private health insurance, they may be able to assist with recommendations.
Has your DS started school, how is he doing, have school suggested any help he might need? Does your youngest get 15 free hours yet, or if not can you pay for nursery anyway and use that time to do whatever gives you a bit more capacity to deal with things when you do have them?
Best of luck, hope you can find a way forward.