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Parenting

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Original poster

How old is too old for a Princess party? 😢

35 replies

GabriellaFaith · 26/09/2023 00:10

Please bear with me as an emotional and anxious mum!

My girls, currently 6 and 7 years old, LOVE Disney princesses. Every year since they were 3 we have done each of them an over the top princess party. We all absolutely love it and have so many precious happy memories. I love the magic and the excitement when they meet the princess and I spend months and months making all the details like the decorations just right.

Anyway! I had planned parties until they turn 10, with their best party to be when they turned 10 thinking that would be their last one believing in the magic etc. Something a bit extra special and with their favourite princess.

But when I was chatting to some other mums they said 8 would definitely be the last one, 9 year olds don't believe in santa or princesses etc. It's broke me!

So now I'm panicking, I need to book my eldests 8th birthday party soon and I am now wondering if I need it to be the big last special one I had planned for when she turned 10?! Also wondering if I need to go bankrupt and book Lapland this year too?! OMG!

I am so not ready for all the magic to end, and if I'm honest, I feel upset that I won't get to do all I had planned with them before they grow up. I know it sounds pathetic, but these parties mattered to me. My best memories of my own childhood are my parties and I wanted that for my girls too. I don't remember my first being born (I was very unwell in hospital at the time) and I had an emergency section for my second (under anasetic) so I feel like birthdays are especially important to celebrate and remember. They are big moments in their little lives.

Im sorry I am rambling, I am having chemo, all going to be fine, but making proper childhood magical memories feels overwhelmingly important to me right now and I'm worried I'm getting it wrong.

I am trying to be practical and realistic, if this is my last year, I am going all out 👊🤞

Please honest answers! Thanks so much! I'm impressed you read to the end! 🙈

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DresdenDoll · 26/09/2023 00:16

My 7yo has never had any interest in princesses. Of the 9 &10 yo girls I know, all would cringe at the idea of a princess party now, even those who would have liked it when they were younger.

Ariela · 26/09/2023 00:17

Ask your daughter what SHE wants. It is her birthday after all.
(FWIW my eldest simply wouldn't have enjoyed a princess party )

Original poster

GabriellaFaith · 26/09/2023 00:18

I really appreciate you taking the time to answer and the honesty. Thank you.

OP posts:

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PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 26/09/2023 00:20

I think you need to breathe. You’ve built an idea that 10 will be a mega party in your head and are now spiralling thinking it won’t occur. Try to be positive and believe you will have your kids have 16th,18th, 21sts weddings etc as well, understand that can be a spiral thinking because of the chemo however. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself make sure your child has the best birthday FOR THEM not what you have planned in your head

Original poster

GabriellaFaith · 26/09/2023 00:21

Oh she absolutely wants a Princess party, she talks about it all year! But she also wants me to do her a Princess party every year until I die 😂 So she definitely wants it this year.

I am just trying to work out if this is my last year with her believing in all the magic and if I need to cram in as much as I can as a priority over anything else!

Thank you x

OP posts:

Marblessolveeverything · 26/09/2023 00:21

I appreciate you have and had a lot which may be impacting on the value you are placing on a very specific type of celebration.

I know with your determination and enthusiasm you will make those magical memories. They just may not necessarily princess theamed.

And that is ok, because it is the memories of their dreams you want to give.

Wetblanket78 · 26/09/2023 00:22

The 6 year old you might get away with not sure about the 7 year old. Maybe a disco for her instead. Why don't you ask them what they want?

AgnesR · 26/09/2023 00:24

I would definately consider this to be the last princess party. Doesn't have to be if she wants another next year. But you can still have amazing parties in future with other themes if her interests move on!

EveryOtherNameTaken · 26/09/2023 00:26

When I was 10 I wanted to sleep in tents in the garden because I was a tomboy.

It's her party, so if she wants to Princess, let her Princess!!

DiaNaranja · 26/09/2023 00:26

My eldest is about to turn 9, and definitely past the whole princess party age I'm afraid. She's never been overly girly, but some of her friends are, and I can't imagine any of them wanting to do a princess party anymore. They seem to grow up and change alot between 7-8... mine is still adorable and sweet, but suddenly quite into fashion, trends, and anything that seems a little more "grown up" 🥺. Her sister is 7, and again, growing up fast, definitely past the princess stage, but may be because of the cross over with siblings of her sisters age, the younger ones all seem much more grown up than the older ones did at the same age. All the parents agree. Definitely still team santa and tooth fairy etc here, for as long as I can cling on to! They love it, and I'm sure will pretend to "believe" long past them realising that logically it's not real, as they just adore the magic of it all.

Original poster

GabriellaFaith · 26/09/2023 00:27

Thank you. They are both still Disney obsessed and want princess parties again. They are very sweet and always say they like the surprise but they want a Princess to come. They believe we (hubby / daddy and I) pay for the Princesses plane ticket to come as their birthday present bless them. They don't get any presents from us. The party is it. They are always so thankful, never spoilt about it. Absolutely makes my day. I'm just wondering if this will be my last ones this year😢

OP posts:

Original poster

GabriellaFaith · 26/09/2023 00:29

Thank you very much for taking the tien to reply to me. I wish you all the luck in the world with santa and the tooth fairy! I kind of assumed once one thing stopped they all did together. Felt like their childhood was about to end and pre-teen commence!

OP posts:

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 26/09/2023 00:31

You need to relax. Their other interests will be different from Disney but you’ll get as much out of seeing them enjoy it.

in some ways when they’re older it’s actually more special. My DS2 is a typical 13yo. The smile on his face when let loose at a theme park with his three besties on his birthday last year was just as good as the one on his face when he was younger and Spider-Man turned up at his party. Maybe even better as the smiles are rarer.

Sillysosij · 26/09/2023 00:33

Strangers on the internet can’t tell you what your kids want. I would have loved a princess party until I was probably 11? Even then I would secretly have wanted one. Tbh… I would still want one now!! My last birthday cake was actually a tacky princess castle cake like I always wanted when I was little and my friends gave me gifts in Disney princess paper! You know your kids best. I wouldn’t ‘go broke’ over a party either way but you know if they will still love princesses or not.

NuffSaidSam · 26/09/2023 00:39

OP, you need to take a breath!

Firstly, it's never good to 'save up the magic' for a future date, who knows what might happen. If you've got something up your sleeve use it this year. Then, if they still want princesses at 10 you can come up with a new idea. Having their birthdays until they are 10 planned out is a bit mad tbh!

Don't hold fun or great memories back for years down the line, do it now.

And don't write your kids off as if there won't be any special moments once they stop believing in fairies/princesses/Santa etc. Maybe you'll just need to think a bit more creatively? Take them to see the Northern Lights. On a sunrise hike. To the top of a mountain. To the bottom of the sea (or just scuba diving). The world is full of magic.

Lookingforasilverlining · 26/09/2023 02:22

There interests will change and they’re there on people. It’s time to let them choose do they want a princess party, laser quest, trampoline party. Whatever party they want will be magical.

WandaWonder · 26/09/2023 02:28

You need to let them have the party they want, they are their own people and not an extension on you, you need to be careful and let them be themselves

AdalineStephen · 26/09/2023 02:47

If they want a princess party now, do the princess party now. No one can tell you what they will want in 2 years. They might still want one but be embarrassed to have one at age 10 as their friends might be past it. That sort of thing comes into play as they get older. I would seize the day, personally.

MaggieBsBoat · 26/09/2023 02:54

If they want princess parties then that’s fine! It could be their last in terms of wanting them or not. Who knows. My 11 year old daughter would love it and although likes all the tween stuff is a big fan of Disney princesses, my other daughter was already on My Chemical Romance and skateboarding at 8!
Don’t make it about you. If you genuinely suspect it’s the last then sure go big or go home! But there’s no need to. Seriously. No Lapland trips or massive shindigs are more important than the memories of their mum and dad smiling and spending the day with them celebrating them!
I know this as I had no parties. You are doing just great!

Blueeyedmale · 26/09/2023 02:58

Whatever party they have now or in the future they clearly have the love of their mum who wants the best for them,that's the best kind of magic nothing can eclipse that

Silkiebunny · 26/09/2023 03:27

You can have wonderful parties for a few years yet, I would just check with your girls what they want each year, may change from princesses but could move to a new magical theme you have yet to discover.

Lapland is wonderful, do go if you get the chance and now is an ideal age though you are never too old for Lapland.

Hope the chemo goes as well as it can. I did mine last year but my DD is 17 and so no princess party but we went to Mauritius together, there are always lovely things you can do but kids change with age but that's lovely.

Lovely they have such a caring Mum.

Echobelly · 26/09/2023 03:34

You sound rather over-invested in these parties.... yes, young kids do talk about their birthday parties all year, and they do sometimes start talking about next year's the minute this year's is over. Planning years ahead isn't necessary - take the cue from them, they'll know if they want to to a princess party and how their friends will feel about it but don't get hung up on it. I can see getting the chemo - and good luck with it - can hang on your mind but take it one year at a time, and don't feel pressure that everything has to be 'magical' or perfect.

10th birthdays are really not a big deal as well, I've never heard of anyone making them 'extra special', you won't be letting them down if it's just another party, it's fine.

inappropriateraspberry · 26/09/2023 03:40

Just give her a lovely princess party this year. Next year she will probably want a party - it may be a different theme, but that doesn't mean it can't still have the fun and 'magic' you want.
My DD is 8 and had a princess party, but I think that will be the last little girl party. She's previously had mermaid and dinosaur parties! All were great and she loved them. Next year will probably be a film and sleepover with a few friends. Although she has just asked about having a Halloween party! Just do what she wants, not what you want.

Toddlerteaplease · 26/09/2023 04:00

If she still wants one do it. If she doesn't then don't. Be guided by her. She might find something else equally magical for her.

mathanxiety · 26/09/2023 04:51

I have a friend who has a princess party every year. We are both 58.

For your DD though, a lot may change in her world between now and her 10th. She will change a lot in many ways. Don't put pressure on her to have any specific party (or any party at all) for her 10th. Don't get too invested in the topic yourself. Keep your ears open and be prepared to change course.

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