Ds1 floored me with a question today? How would you answer this?

[Aero]

He was at home today with toothache and on the way to the dentist in the car he calmly said, "Mummy, what is a c**t?" He is almost 10 and knew to ask me when his younger siblings weren't around as he suspected it was bad.

On one hand, I'm glad he can come to me and ask me these things without fear of being told off. On the other hand, I feel he's so young to know the meaning of such words.

I did explain what it means and how it is often used out of context etc, etc (and that I never want to hear him say it to anyone), and that he likely to hear it in the playground from time to time like he did yesterday, but I just wondered how others would react and if your children are ok with asking you straight out about such things.

dd1 would definitely come straight out with something like that
I would say its a nasty slang term for etc that is seen as a very ugly word and is not to be used by you

I would tell. I would give context. And I would (have with other words!) say that I don't expect him to use it when I or another adult or a teacher can hear because he will be being rude/ get into trouble. Yes my DS1 will ask, and I always answer. But he hasn't got to the c-word yet, AFAIK!

Great that he can ask and is still innocent enough to know mummy has all the answers and he hasn't said anything bad. DS is 8.5 and still believes in Father Christmas and giggles at the word 'willy'. I'd want him to ask me about words he doesn't know and I wouldn't be too surprised if he'd read it somewhere and very impressed if he'd heard it (he's deaf).

I would have just said the same really - was prob a shock to hear it out of your ds's mouth though

I was just so shocked! He's such a gentle boy that I never expected such a word to come over his lips! I did also say that he'd be in serious trouble if he was ever heard saying it at school etc.

When I first heard the word, I had no idea what it meant for years, but instinctively knew it was worse (imo) than the 'f' word and there's no way I'd have come straight out and asked my parents what it meant! How times have changed and i've always told ds1 to ask me about things he doesn't understand and I'll do my best to answer. It hurt my ears though!

I was about 10 when I first learnt the equivalent Romanian word. I saw it grafitted on a wall and asked a friend. I'd have never asked my mum. She's so uptight she doesn't even mention the p** word (pregnancy, in case you wonder, and she used to be a nurse).

With kids of 10 and over, it's best to take the Roald Dahl approach. Life is exquisite and grubby and exciting. Cunt is a word. As long as he knows he's not to use it in polite company, you and he can have the discussion.

Cunt is an ancient Saxon word ... one of our oldest words. Up until fairly recent times (Victorian), it was fairly normal to call the vagina a cunt. It's only recently that it has become a swear word.

In the 17th century, before the Great Fire of London in 1666, there were places called Cunt Alley (where the prostitutes roamed). It wasn't considered rude.

I am an advocate of open speech with children. What's important is that they learn the propriety.

Actually desi, I did have to admit to him that I didn't know of the origin of the word, so thanks for posting that. I do remember seeing it on here before that it never used to be offensive, but couldn't remember exactly when/why things changed.

I love that 'Life is exquisite and grubby and exciting'. I will quote that next time he hits me with a shocker!

I am so impressed he asked you! I hope my DS feel comfortable asking me about things he doesn't understand. I remember loving Madonna and her song "Like a Virgin". I didn't know what a virgin was but there was no way I would have asked my mother because I thought it was probably something rude. I asked a friend and she said her mum said it was a woman who hadn't had a baby yet.

Ah! That's great, Aero. Your little man is just moving into that other world, right on the cusp of adolescence.

I say make it exciting and interesting. Discuss the issues of life now (in a childlike way): take the bull by the horns. Life is amusing, and we must teach our children that.

He sounds ground, I must say. I have a mental image of him. Is he a charismatic boy?

I must correct

He sounds grand.

I think he is rather. Certainly popular amongst his peers which is lovely. Definitely sensitive and always the pacifist. I'm glad he can ask me and I've always explained things in a 'as they are' fashion at a level he can relate to I hope.

He also asked me recently (just us in the car again), how the daddies stopped the babies from getting into the mummies tummies!
Bit of a conversation stopper that was! At least I didn't say 'ask your father', but I wanted to!!