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Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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Original poster

Daughter struggling with nursery

8 replies

Helpmeout124 · 12/09/2023 22:14

Hello, my daughter is 3 and has autism. She has also started nursery this week, unfortunately about 2 weeks before beginning nursery she started biting. Not very often, but enough for me to bring it up to the nursery staff on her first day.

she bit a staff member on her first settling in session, and she was supposed to start full days on Tuesday, but she bit a child on the shoulder on Monday so management decided to hold back her start date and give her another settling session on Thursday, with a potential start date next week.

I did say as did her portage support worker to the nursery that she would need 1-1 as she is very unpredictable. Climbs, and head bangs. But they said they would try her in normal ratio to start.

does anyone have experience of something similar. Will they say she can't stay? Will they keep her off untill they can arrange 1-1

I work evenings so it's not an issue with child care I just don't want her missing out on the crucial year before she starts school next September. But obviously I'm equally as concerned about the safety of the other children. I just know she needs 1-1 and I really hope they see that too and can't sort it. I can't take my eyes off her for a second or she gets hurt, hurts someone or gets herself into a potentially dangerous situation. So with 5 children it's impossible

OP posts:

Original poster

Helpmeout124 · 12/09/2023 22:21

Her portage worker (not sure if it's called something different in other counties) but here it's support for children and families with children with disabilities.

but anyway. Her portage worker was the one who really encouraged me to send her to nursery because I wasn't really going to put her in, I was happy to keep her home with me but she insisted it would be best for her, which I think it will be hopefully if we can just get the support she needs

OP posts:

caban · 12/09/2023 22:23

It will take a while to arrange 1:1 funding.
In my county the early years setting has to try to manage on their own, get support from LA inclusion officers, implement advice and then be able to evidence that they can't manage before applying for inclusion funding. And it won't necessarily cover full time 1:1.

Have you thought about requesting an assessment for an EHCP for your DD? If you think she's going to need 1:1 support into school then it's worth getting the ball rolling with the nursery SENCO now.

Original poster

Helpmeout124 · 12/09/2023 22:28

Her EHCP is supposed to begin as soon as she's settled in (if that actually happens)

oh god really, that sounds like a nightmare, she's only for a year and these things don't happen quickly do they, she seems to be perfectly happy at nursery but I just think they're going to struggle and I'm going to be signing incident forms every night. She's only 2 days a week. But I feel so sorry for her as she dosnt understand and can't communicate effectively. And of course, so sorry to any child who might get a nip. I don't know what to do, I have no idea how to stop the biting. I've been on the recieving end a few times and it hurts

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Interested in this thread?

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3 year olds Childcare & nursery Families General parenting

caban · 12/09/2023 23:02

Hopefully this year will be time to get the EHCP in place before she starts school.

I think you just have to trust the nursery to manage the biting. Would it be possible to do 4 mornings instead of the 2 full days?

Original poster

Helpmeout124 · 12/09/2023 23:24

I don't think I can because they said they try to space the higher needs children out so they're not in at the same time so she can only do the times she's doing

OP posts:

Smartiepants79 · 13/09/2023 07:09

So she already has an EHCP?
Does it come with extra funding and say she’s entitled to 1-1 support?
If so it should just be about finding the staff to provide it. Which hopefully should take too long.
If there isn’t an EHCP already in place then, yes, that’s going to take months. Still advise you get it started and try and keep her involved in nursery as much as possible. It’s good preparation for school and can help with evidence for the support she needs.

Original poster

Helpmeout124 · 13/09/2023 10:58

She dosnt have an EHCP they said they'd start the process once she's been in nursery a couple of weeks, hopefully done by Christmas 🤞🏻

OP posts:

Valkyriee · 19/09/2023 20:47

My DD is 4 and was diagnosed with autism at 3. She's been in indie nursery for a year now and while she can talk (started talking at 3) she has difficulty understanding language and communicating what she wants or needs. She also has anxiety and sensory difficulties. Was having meltdowns everyday in nursery but they've stopped now. They applied for full time 121 as soon as she started and it came through 4 months later. She now has full time 15 hours 121 which is maximum funding I think. We've now applied for EHCP and waiting draft. We did it ourselves by the way. Nursery wanted to wait if that's anything to go by...

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