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The fussy eater

3 replies

Stawbydanes · 10/09/2023 18:27

DS is nearly 3 and we tend to often have trouble with tea time at home. It doesn't seem to be impacted based on having tea at 4.30, 5 or occasionally 6 - we usually have the same issue regardless.

At nursery he eats a lot and once a week with my mum he devours fish and chips so I'm not too worried about him not eating enough, it's more just frustrating.

At the weekend, we sit DS down sometimes with us, sometimes on his own. He plays with his fork, tips drips of his drink into his hair and generally just messes about. He doesn't tend to like hot food all that much even though I let it cool down a lot before serving. Tonight he has mash, breaded chicken and peas and he is eating his peas one by one with his hands but very slowly doing his usual messing about between bites.

Me and DH completely disagree on how to deal with this.

DH gets cross and repetitively tells DS to get on with his tea. He'll threaten him that there will be nothing after tea if he doesn't eat up.

I try to talk to DS as little as possible, gently reminding him to eat his tea once or twice. I often give in and sometimes DS will let me spoon feed him. If he doesn't eat much, I won't give him anything else but it's not something I threaten, I'll just say it's time to get down. DH says my approach means we're not doing anything to solve the problem.

Neither approach is ideal as both have lots of inconsistencies.

Any ideas would be helpful. My feeling is we'll get there but shouting is going to be counter productive and contribute to a negative atmosphere.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
chillipod · 10/09/2023 18:36

Solid Starts have lots of helpful info about helping fussy eaters, worth a look? They're on instagram and have more detailed guides on their website. It was made by a woman who had a fussy eater child Smile

Likeaburstcouch · 10/09/2023 18:41

I swear by SR nutrition. She has a blog on this, some of this is irrelevant to you but lots should help and it summarises at the bottom.

www.srnutrition.co.uk/2016/05/top-tips-for-dealing-with-a-picky-eater/

Spottypineapple · 10/09/2023 19:09

If he eats fine at nursery and with your mum, then he's not a fussy/picky eater, he's just messing around at the table which is normal toddler behavior.

I would second giving Solid Starts a follow for techniques around 'toddlers at the table' they do have a paid course for this as well but their free content is brilliant.

They would say don't pressure him to finish his tea, don't use dessert as a reward for finishing tea, let them eat as much or as little as they like and feign indifference if they don't eat much. So basically not far off your approach but you need to get your husband on board with this and be consistent

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